


Kylo Ren | One Shots

by supremeleader



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, NSFW, NSFW Stories will be warned in the notes!, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Smut, au's
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-18
Updated: 2018-12-30
Packaged: 2019-04-24 19:58:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 56,779
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14362536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/supremeleader/pseuds/supremeleader
Summary: A collection of Reader Insert requests and non-requests for Kylo Ren, Ben Solo, and Matt the Radar Technician; some originally posted on Tumblr (user damndriver)





	1. Bitter-Sweet Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request: Can I request a modernkylo! X reader where they were enemies at high school and now years later they meet again at Rey's wedding(and the reader might be Rey's little sister)?

Flowers filled your line of vision as you stood outside of the mansion Rey rented for her wedding. The backyard was a world of its own and Rey had decided to hold the ceremony there; flowers and hedges, plants and potted trees surrounding you everywhere you looked. There was even a large fountain that had a stream of water seep away from it as a bridge was built over it.

"A little too much?" Your mother asked as she approached you, the ceremony was going to start soon and you wanted to get a good look at everything.

"You know how Rey is... She likes her plants." You chuckled, turning to face your mother. "How is she? Is she nervous?" You asked as your mother let out a small breath.

"Just a bit, but she's more happy than anything. Said she's been dreaming about this since forever." She smiled as you nodded.

"Well, she really loves Finn, and he really loves her, so it's well deserved." You nodded with a wholehearted smile. "I'm happy for her."

Placing a hand on your arm, your mother then grabbed your hands. "You know that someone will come one day."

"Mom..."

"Y/N..." She lifted an eyebrow. "You're a beautiful woman inside and out, they'll come. I know it."

"Rey met Finn and it was love at first sight... Do you know how rare that is?" You asked as your mother lowered her head for a moment before lifting it.

"Who said it has to be that way?" She shook her head. "For all you know, you've already met them." Winking, she let go of your hands before walking away, leaving you there with slouched shoulders before aiming back inside to prepare for the ceremony.

"There you are!" Rey threw her hands up as you had entered the room she was readying herself in. "How do I look?" She asked with a smile, presenting her gown. Laced long sleeves, the gown hugging her figure before lightly fanning out at the bottom with the tail that it had dragging along the floor. Her hair was in a low updo as her vail was held against it.

"Beautiful." You smiled, nodding your head.

"Thanks... My palms are sweaty." She chuckled as she opened and closed her hands. "Do you think Finn looks handsome? I'm sure he does." She winked as you laughed.

"I think you only have to worry about yourself because you, my lovely sister, outshine everyone else here." You winked as she grinned.

"You look quite beautiful, yourself." She smirked as you chuckled. A simple light beige gown that was strapless, not too tight but not too loose. Your hair was left loose in gentle waves.

"Thank you." You bowed your head before walking over to the balcony window of the room. "So... You did a great job with all the planning. It's beautiful." You said, eyeing the people filling up the white chairs that were set up.

"Thank you, mom kept saying it was a bit too much..." She rolled her eyes before walking over to stand beside you. "She doesn't understand the beauty of nature."

"That's just mom." You sighed, eyeing the recognizable faces you saw. "She'll never change."

"Oh well." Rey shrugged. As she eyed the crowd with you, her eyes landed on a specific couple. An older one that was, close friends of your parents. Han and Leia. "Y/N, have I told you who Finn's groomsmen are?"

"No." You shook your head. "I just know the bridesmaids."

Biting her inner lip, Rey took in a small breath. "Oh..."

"Why?" You asked.

"Well... Uh, you know how the bridesmaids walk down the isle with the groomsmen?" Rey scratched the back of her neck.

"Yeah?"

"Okay, well, a friend of our parents asked if we'd add their son to the list since Finn was missing one person... and, with lots of convincing, we did." She nodded as your eyebrows narrowed, unsure of where she was getting at.

"Uh huh..."

"So, you see-" Hearing a knock on the door, you and Rey looked over to see your mother.

"Y/N, let's go, it's about to begin!" Your mother waved her hand as you nodded, walking over.

"Your groomsmen partner is Kylo!" Rey shouted as your eyes widened, heart skipping a beat.

"What?!"

"Come on, Y/N!" Your mother tugged you out as you were pulled along the way, wide eyes and parted lips. How could Rey possibly partner you up with the man you swore was your enemy? The man you despised and loathed? The man you knew was always out to get you?

"No- No, I can't-"

"Oh, relax, it's been years and Kylo's a different man." Your mother waved a hand but you shook your head.

"N- No, he's not, he will never be!"

"Shh! You're making a fool out of yourself." Your mother shook her head, bringing you with the rest of the bridesmaids who were already in their positions. "Get in your spot and don't ruin this." She pointed a finger at you, shoving you into your spot before handing you your bouquet.

"But, mom-"

"Grow up, you're an adult now!" She fired as you frowned.

Hearing the music began as the ceremony started, you stood there with furrowed eyebrows and a scowl on your face. You couldn't believe Rey would do that to you knowing how much you couldn't stand Ben "Kylo Ren" Solo.

As the bridesmaids walked in and paired up with their groomsmen, one by one as the line moved, you were one of the last's since Rey wanted you to end up standing close to her—a sacrifice Finn made knowing Kylo would be close to him.

Lifting your head and seeing Kylo practically stare at you, you walked up and harshly grabbed his arm. "Don't fuck this up, Ren, this is my sisters wedding." You snapped before forcing a smile on your face.

"Anything for you, princess." He teased as you growled, walking out with him.

Lucky for you, the walk wasn't too long and you acted as if he was just some guy; you hardly looked at him, but, the feeling of his muscles against your hand didn't help when they were so... hard. You hadn't gotten a good look at him as you were just blinded with rage, but, you did notice a drastic change from the glimpse you took.

Taking your spot throughout the ceremony, tearing up the entire time at the sight of your sister, you had nearly forgotten about the fact that Kylo was even there. That is until everyone was dismissed and sent inside for the reception and Kylo just had to approach you.

"It was absolutely beautiful." You said to Finn as he stood beside Rey, you smiling to the two as you held a quick conversation with them. "I'm so happy for you two, congrats!" You clapped, pulling them into a hug as they laughed.

"Congratulations." A fourth party spoke, the low voice making you sigh as you knew which mouth it came out of. "And thank you for inviting me."

"It was solely because I needed someone to fill the spot." Finn glared as Rey patted his chest.

"Your parents insisted we invite you, as well." Rey said as Kylo lifted his eyebrows. "You weren't in the... original guess list."

"Well, it's nice to know I was a second thought." He shrugged, not taking any of it to heart. He was never close to the two anyway... but, to you? Oh, if he didn't love making your life a living hell. "But, I'll admit, I solely came for Y/N."

"Ugh." You groaned, rolling your eyes. "We're adults now, act like one." You snapped.

"Of course, that's why I came here." Kylo said with a grin, your eyebrows narrowing as you looked over at him, this time you noticing how much he had changed. Much more bigger... and far more broad than what you remembered. It had been so long since you had last seen him... This man was far different from the Kylo you once knew and hated. At least, look-wise. His personality? Possible just the same.

"We'll leave you two be." Rey nodded as you snapped your head over, giving her a pleading look, but Rey only shrugged and walked away with Finn as you frowned.

"Alright, spit it out, Kylo. What mischievous plan do you have hidden up your sleeve?" You pointed a finger as you instantly turned to face him, glaring.

Rolling his eyes, Kylo shook his head. "None."

"That is bullshit! You always have something evil plotted against me!" You stomped but he sighed.

"Y/N, that was then. If I had something planned, then, I would've done it during the ceremony. Not now." He chuckled but your eyebrows scrunched up even more.

"I don't believe that." You shook your head. "You don't like Finn nor Rey, so it's impossible to believe that you came here just to come."

Smirking down at you as he stuck his hands into the pockets of his slacks, he leaned forward. "Best believe it."

"I won't because it isn't true." You crossed your arms, stubbornly lifting your head and looking elsewhere as Kylo grinned. As much as it bothered him, seeing how stubborn you could be, he couldn't help but smile even more. You were in denial, he knew that, and he found it cute.

"I won't do anything to you, Y/N. I am not the same person I was before. It's been years, you're not my target anymore. I've moved on. Now I bother someone else because I actually hate them." He admitted as you instantly looked over at him.

"What?" Your eyebrows furrowed.

Arching an eyebrow, Kylo shook his head. "I never hated you, Y/N. You were just an easy target."

"Easy target?!" You scoffed as he smirked once again.

"Yes." Kylo nodded. "I loved seeing you get all flustered, it was cute." He shrugged.

"Cute?! What are you trying to pull, boy? Why are you here?" You squinted your eyes.

"For you." He simply confessed as your glare dropped.

"For me? I knew you had something-"

"Because it's been too long and I'm tired of playing scavenger hunt just to find you. I found the opportunity and took it." He said, removing a hand from his pocket and swiping his finger underneath your chin. "No one compares to you, my dear Y/N."

"What..." You breathed.

"Is it not obvious?" He chuckled as you shook your head. "I like you, Y/N. Always have and I never stopped. You've always been on my mind... And seeing you now, all grown up, the feelings blossomed."

Gulping, you took a small step back, distancing yourself from him as your eyes widened. "I... Have to go." Lifting your dress and rushing off, away from Kylo and going inside, he watched with a sly grin. He knew very well you felt the same.

Spending most of the afternoon trying to avoid any sort of contact with Kylo—including eye contact—you found yourself taking in endless rounds of any alcohol you could get. You wanted to forget what you heard, to act like it didn't happen, because (sad thing was) you knew that deep down there were unclaimed feelings for him in your heart that you've avoided for so long.

"Y/N?" Rey furrowed her brows as she walked up to you, you on your fifth drink—maybe sixth, you couldn't remember—as you leaned against a pillar.

"Reeey!" You drawled out, grinning. "The drinks are... phenomenal." You snickered as she slowly nodded, grabbing your drink and peeling it from your hold. "Hey!"

"I'll give it back but for now you need to ease off a bit." She lied, only to drink the rest herself as you frowned. "No more alcohol, only water, I'll tell the bar tender." She pointed a finger at you as your frown deepened.

"But-"

"No." She waved her finger. "I want you to remember this day." Turning away and walking off with your cup, you watched her and dropped your shoulders.

"But I don't..." Groaning, you rolled off the pillar and nearly tripped from your heel.

Aiming for the backyard and pushing the glass doors open, seeing there were people outside, you decided to get some fresh air, to get your mind off of things, maybe cool off a bit from the heat you now felt all throughout your body.

Lazily walking down the steps as you held the railings, you eyed the fountain beside you before aiming for the bridge. It was nice and rather big, a bit out of place and should've been put in front of the house, but, you liked it either way.

It was also tempting... You could so easily dive in and cool off, your body was on fire and the water looked cold. But, to your surprise, you knew better.

Letting out a sigh and rubbing your face, you felt someone bump into you. Feeling your foot slip over the edge of the bridge as you gasped, you instantly fell in and hit your head.

"Oh, gosh!" The woman that had accidentally hit you exclaimed, covering her mouth.

Hearing the commotion as Kylo was speaking to his parents from afar, he looked over. Of course he had noticed you when you had walked outside but he didn't want to make it any obvious to his parents that he was interested—even if Leia sensed something. 

Realizing you were no longer there, he then noticed a body—your body—floating in the fountain. "Y/N?!" He shouted, rushing over as his parents instantly followed after.

Stepping into the fountain and not caring if his shoes got wet, Kylo quickly lifted you in his arms and got out, Leia walking up to him and checking your pulse, then, your head and made sure you weren't bleeding. "She's fine... she must've hit her head." Leia said with a small sigh. "We should take her in."

Nodding his head, Kylo pushed through the small crowd that had built up, entering the home as Rey gasped. "Y/N?"

"She's fine." Leia assured. "She fell into the fountain and hit her head."

"Did she fall in herself or?" Rey asked, concerned as either of your parents sprinted over.

"Someone accidentally pushed her in, must've bumped." Han said as your mother sighed.

"Here, come with me, Kylo." Your mother waved.

"I have extra clothes upstairs, please give them to her." Rey said to her mother as she nodded.

"Thank you for getting her out." Your mother said to Kylo as she guided him up the stairs. "Rey told me she was drinking a bit too much and I was afraid she fell in on her own..."

"It's nothing." Kylo shook his head, but he was processing your mother's words. You weren't much of a drinker, at least, not that he knew of.

"Here... I'll get her some clothes." She said as she opened the door to the guest room, Kylo walking in. Feeling you shift in his arms as you groaned, he lied you down before going to get a towel from the bathroom.

Fluttering your eyes open and instantly trembling from the wet gown and hair, you realized you were no longer outside, but in a room. "Ouch..." You groaned, touching your head and feeling it throb.

Sitting up and rubbing your arms, you heard footsteps approach you. "Oh, good, you're okay."

Looking over and seeing Kylo, you shoved your face into your hands as he shook his head, sitting beside you and putting the towel over your shoulders as he rubbed them. "You're the last person I want to see..." You mumbled but Kylo dismissed your words and kept trying to warm you up, but you shrugged him off and stood up, kicking off your heels and wrapping the towel over your shoulders to keep you warm.

Sighing, Kylo watched you. "Come on, Y/N. Don't be stubborn. I'm trying to help."

"I don't need your help." You spoke over your shoulder.

Standing up and walking over to you, Kylo gently got a hold of your hand. "I'm trying here, you know."

Hearing the door open, you instantly slid your hand from Kylo's as he rubbed his forehead, you looking over and seeing it was your mother. "Oh, thank god." She breathed, settling the clothing onto the dresser and rushing up to you. "This is the exact reason why you don't drink."

"I never do..." You grumbled, causing Kylo to look over at you. "I just... Saw the opportunity and took it." You lied—Kylo knew this.

"Well, look where that ended you." Your mother gestured her hand at your soaked body as you sighed. "Look, I want you to shower and change into this, and I want Kylo to stay and make sure you don't slip in the shower or anything-"

"Mom!" You whined but she shook her head.

"You did this to yourself and Kylo was the one who got you out. If you decide to join the party again, you can." She said, kissing your forehead before leaving the room. "Make sure she doesn't hurt herself again." She pointed at you as she spoke over to Kylo before leaving your sight.

Dropping your head and rubbing your face, you sighed. "You know you don't have to listen to her." You said, lifting your head and turning to face Kylo, but he gave you a look as if he wasn't going to disobey your mother's words.

"Why were you drinking?" He asked, changing the subject as your eyebrows narrowed.

"That's my business." You defended but Kylo wasn't buying it, so, he took a step closer.

And then, you took a step back.

"Why are you so defensive?"

"I'm not." You spoke through a clenched jaw. "I'm not."

"I get it if you were drinking because my confession was too much and it made you realize that you feel the same." He nodded as you gasped.

"In your dreams!" You exclaimed but Kylo smiled.

"I've dreamt about it plenty." He admitted as you scoffed.

Turning away and grabbing the clothes, you aimed for the washroom. "I don't want to see you when I come back out."

"I'm staying here whether you like it or not. Your mother's orders." Kylo said, turning on his heel.

"I don't care what she says, I'm an adult and I can handle myself." You seethed, just about to shut the door but Kylo caught it with his foot.

"That's why you fell into the fountain, huh?"

"I was bumped into!" You shouted, Kylo shaking his head. "Move your foot."

"No."

"Why?!"

"In case you fall, I don't have to break down this expensive door." He said, eyeing it before looking back down at you.

"Ugh." You rolled your eyes. "Fine, but don't you dare try taking a peek." You pointed your finger, Kylo lifting his hands and taking a step back as you closed the door enough for there to be a sliver of light coming out from the bathroom.

Sitting on the edge of the bed and waiting for you, you eventually came out in a casual dress, wet hair being dried up enough with your towel.

"You're still here?" You asked, looking over at Kylo who was sat on the bed.

"Yes, Y/N." He sighed, standing up. "I told you I wasn't going to leave in case-"

"Something happened. Yeah, I know, but I'm fine and nothing happened." You said with a shrug.

Looking down at you, Kylo crossed his arms, his dress shirt hugging his biceps as you screwed your eyes back. "Why are you trying to push me away?"

"Push you away? Kylo, you're not even close to me." You snickered but he shook his head.

"No, you're pushing me away by avoiding me. I told you I liked you and I still do-"

"Congratulations! I don't care." You lied, just about ready to turn around and leave, but Kylo stopped you. "Just leave me-" Pulling you to him, Kylo's lips pressed against your own as your eyes bulged.

"N- No!" You shoved him. "You don't get to do that! You don't get to just kiss me and think- and think that'll prove something!" You shook your head, but as you were ranting, your lips tingled with the sensation of his own. "You can't just.... You can't just- Not when- I don't-" Losing your train of thought as you couldn't even seem to focus on what you wanted to say, Kylo shook his head.

"You talk too much." Grabbing your face and pulling you back into the kiss, you simply gave in and caved in as your shoulders dropped, not wanting to admit that this was what you wanted since forever.

"Y/N, are you- Oh my god!" Rey exclaimed as she had opened the door to the room you were in, you had gotten carried away and hadn't realized that you were making out with Kylo until you shoved him off as he tripped over his own foot and fell back.

"Huh?" You asked as you turned to face her, a hand on your hip as your other wiped your lips.

Shaking her head, eyeing Kylo—who was on the floor, sat up on his elbows—then over to you, she sighed. "Well, I'm glad my plan worked out."

"What?!" You and Kylo said in unison.

"Just don't forget that this is my wedding." Rey winked before shutting the door behind her.

"I should say I'm surprised that she did this for a reason." Kylo said, sitting up as you then looked over at him and shook your head. "But I'm not. And I know my mother had a part in this, she's always been skeptical and always asked me about you and why-"

Practically tackling him back down onto the floor and smashing your lips against his, you snickered. "You talk too much."


	2. Curiosity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request: Hello! You are one of the best writers ive found! I know it says your requests are closed, but I would like you to have this idea for when they are open again. Plus, I dont want to forget about it! But I was thinking, could you do one where reader and Kylo have a daughter and one day, Kylo leaves his lightsaber somewhere and his daughter finds it and starts playing with it and he freaks out because reader isnt around and he doesnt really know how to handle it? Id really appreciate it! Thanks!

"Where the hell did I put it?" Kylo mumbled to himself as he searched his belt for his lightsaber. Something felt off with the weight distribution he usually felt on his hips. His lightsaber—something he always had with him—wasn't there.

For a moment, he almost feared someone had stolen it from him, but he knew it wasn't possible. He would've felt it. He would've seen someone try and take it. Especially when his cape covered most of his body.

"Shit..." Kylo cursed under his breath. He felt almost naked without it. He never went a day without it at his hip.

Turning on his heel and retracing his steps, in hopes it hadn't fallen, he found himself aiming back for his chambers. Maybe he was in such a rush that he completely forgot about it. Or maybe he just assumed it was already attached to his belt...

Opening the door to his private quarters, Kylo let out a small breath, waving his hand for the door to shut behind him before he started his treasure hunt. This somehow always happened with other things like his datapad or one of his boots—solely because his five year old daughter always had them hidden (and not on purpose). She just had more fun playing with _his_ things than her own.

Searching the faint living area, through the couch and table, bookshelves and cabinets, he aimed for his bedroom. As soon as he opened up the door, he took an instant double take. His daughter was sat on his bed, holding something a bit too big for her small hands as she waved it around. "Honey..." Kylo slowly said as he walked over to her. Seeing that it was his lightsaber in her hold, he gulped. "Sweetie... What are you holding?"

Standing up on the bed and turning around to face her father, his daughter smiled at him. "Daddy's laser!" She beamed up at him, holding the heavy hilt in her hands, fingers coming close to the activation switch.

"How did you get it?" He asked, carefully sitting beside her and hoping she wouldn't accidentally push the switch.

"It was on the table." She pointed to his nightstand as Kylo shut his eyes for a moment, cursing under his breath at his own mistake.

Sighing, Kylo reached out his gloved hand. "Daddy needs his lightsaber for work." He said but she frowned. "I promise I'll get you one, _one_ day." He nodded as a smile instantly grew on her face, dimples appearing on her cheeks, much like her fathers.

"Okay!" She squealed, handing him the hilt as he quickly took it, clipping it to his waist before grabbing her and standing her in between his legs.

"Where's mommy?" He asked, looking into her hazel eyes, much like his own.

Biting her thumb as her other hand lied on Kylo's wrist, she then pointed to the washroom. "Showering." She nodded.

"And... And she didn't notice you took the lightsaber?"

"No." She shook her head. "Mommy left me with my toys... But then I found your laser." She admitted, looking down at his belt, puffy cheeks growing a tint of red as if embarrassed. As if she did something wrong.

"It's okay, you're not in trouble." He breathed, sensing her sudden worry. "It's just... My _laser_ isn't something to play with, okay?"

Looking back up at him, she nodded. "Okay, daddy."

Smiling at her, he twirled one of her pigtails around his finger before wrapping his arms around her small frame and hugging her. "Thank you." Pushing her back and kissing her forehead, he then heard the washroom door open behind him.

"Kylo?" You spoke up, amazed that he was _home_ already. Seeing him look over his shoulder, your daughter than waved at you as you smiled at her. "What happened?"

"Well, I forgot to put my lightsaber on my belt and I found our little curious monkey here playing with it." He said as he stood up, daughter in his hold on one arm.

Lifting your eyebrows, you covered your mouth. "Oh..."

"Luckily, I came in time." He sighed as he walked over to you.

"I had no idea it was even here... I just left her with her toys and told her I'd be right out and that the door was unlocked if she needed anything..." You said, looking at Kylo, then at your daughter and caressing her cheek.

"It's fine, I've got to be more careful." He said as you looked back up at him.

"Daddy said he will make me a laser!" Your daughter spoke up with excitement, you arching an eyebrow at Kylo.

"Is that so?" You tilted your head as he gave you an awkward smile, taking a small step back.

"I have to head back..." Kylo nodded, handing you your daughter over, kissing the back of her head before kissing you. "I am the Supreme Leader after all!" Seeing him wave and rush off, you shook your head before looking down at your daughter.

"Your father is something else." You mumbled, kissing your daughters temple before exiting the bedroom.


	3. The Aid (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request: I love your fics!! I kindly request a kylo x reader where reader and kylo have the force connection instead of kylo and rey. Reader sees kylo shirtless, and kylo sees reader naked, they fall in love through the force connection, ends up nsfw. If you could make a fic out of this, it will be greatly appreciated!! Thank you for your hard work and all that you do!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut ahead!

It was the day of the newly titled Supreme Leader's inauguration. The First Order had never seen such a ceremony before when they had the same Supreme Leader since the very beginning of the militias origin story. Months had passed since the construction of the new First Order base. It wasn't entirely a Starkiller Base 2.0, they went a separate route. They went with something stronger, far more sturdy, and something difficult to destroy.

They settled for a planet, and on that planet, they built their new foundation and their brand new Supreme Leader's palace.

Standing at the very front of the rows of soldiers and officers, First Order alliances and all sorts of members who helped run the organization, you took in a small breath. It was the dawn of a new age, and with a new ruling, came new faces. Plenty of new faces.

And you were one of them.

The Knight's of Ren had been promoted to the Supreme Leader's personal guards as well as a few new Force (and non-Force) users to aid and protect the man, himself. He didn't entirely need it, not when he was Force sensitive, but anything could happen. After all, _he_ was the one who killed the Supreme Leader—something no one in the First Order knew about.

Standing with a straight back as you kept your eyes on the freshly done throne, you watched as the Supreme Leader had been given a proper acknowledgment for his newfound title. 

Steadying out your breathing, you made eye contact with the man. A long and fixed gaze that he had given you, almost as if he had been studying you—inside and out. And it felt as if he were doing just that. You felt it in your veins. In your bones. And, in your _soul_.

You were fairly new to the First Order, being one of the few who was brought in to aid to the new Supreme Leader (amongst the other four who had as well). You were the quietest of them all. You did as you were told, kept to your schedule, and stayed in your place. Out of the five, you were the introverted one. Which, of course, had the Supreme Leader curious. He had his eyes on you since day one.

Standing there until the ceremony had finished and everyone was dismissed, you patiently waited for the throne room to file out. Clusters of guests piled out as you watched over your shoulder. The Knights were standing closely to the Supreme Leader as he stayed seated on his new throne while the four other members of the Aid knelt before him as he had given a few orders.

"You are dismissed." Kylo Ren waved a hand as the four stood up from their spots and walked right out, you watching before looking over at him, taking in a small breath. This happened plenty before the base had been opened for business. You were always the last to be acknowledged and dismissed. "Y/L/N." Kylo spoke as you quietly swallowed, walking over as the sound of your shoes had hit the tiled ground, echoing throughout the quiet throne room.

"Supreme Leader." You bowed your head as you knelt before him, the cloak you had been dressed in hid your figure under the carmine color fabric. Something all Aid's wore

"How did you enjoy the ceremony?" He asked, your head slowly lifting up and looking at him.

"It was wonderful, Supreme Leader." You truthfully spoke as he nodded his head, standing up from his throne with a small breath before walking down the steps, towards you. You never understood as to why he always singled you out. Why it was that you were the one to stay behind. To have one-on-one. It made you nervous. You feared you had done something wrong each and every time.

Like, now. Your heart began to race in your chest as he aimed for you, unsure as to why. "There is no need to worry." He spoke, sensing your jitteriness as he came to a stop before you, sticking out his leather gloved hand towards you. "You are not in trouble."

Breathing in deeply, you carefully reached out your hand towards his as your cloak lightly fell open for your arm to stick out.

Taking your hand in his, Kylo helped bring you to your feet as you were now standing before him, eyes never leaving his—and neither did his to yours. "I want to thank you for your work amongst the Aid's." He began, voice softer than it normally was. "Although it was quite the new task for you, moving away from your home planet to work amongst the First Order... You are of big help."

"Always, Supreme Leader." You bowed your head, heart still racing within your chest.

"You are the quietest of the bunch... Yet, the most productive and useful. I appreciate it."

"Anything for you and the First Order." You nearly breathed, trying your best to steady out your faint pant, heartbeat sounding within your ears.

Still holding your hand in his, Kylo brushed his thumb against your knuckles before gently letting go. "You are dismissed."

Taking a small step back and bowing, you turned and walked off, footsteps echoing against the tall walls of the throne room, stormtroopers opening the door for you before you exited. The sound of the door shutting hummed in the large room, vibrating against Kylo's feet as he stood there with his eyes still focused on where you once were.

You were unaware of it, but the Force moved heavily around you and only you amongst the rest—especially within the Aid's. You had believed that there were Force users amongst the group... What you hadn't known was the truth.

There was only one and they were Force sensitive. And it was you.

Heavily inhaling then exhaling, you walked along the empty halls, towards where your chambers were—the Aid's living within the palace as the Knight's did as well.

Your heart was racing faster than before and you were unsure as to why, wondering what had changed. What had made you feel so... antsy and jittery? What had taken your breath away and what made your heart beat the way it was now?

It wasn't uncommon for you to be a bit shy around the Supreme Leader, he was intimidating and he was the highest ranking official. He was also devilishly handsome and had this aura that drove you mad. But that was something you never thought too hard on, telling yourself that anyone—or maybe everyone else—thought like that.

That day... that moment you had first met him, where he recruited you and took you in, you could never forget the feeling in your chest... In your soul. It was so strong, it felt heavy. Till this day, you weren't sure what it was. It wasn't like you had never spoken to a ruler or leader before, you had previously worked amongst royalty.

It was something about the man behind the scar. Something about Kylo Ren that had your mind fogged up. Nearly making you lightheaded.

Just as you were now. Rubbing your forehead and entering your personal quarters, you thanked the stars that the day had been over; solely because you were just ready to pass out for the evening.

Remove your cloak and hanging it up, loosening your hair from the low bun it was in, running your fingers through it before you removed your boots and the rest of your outfit, hanging them up before entering your washroom, stripping off your underwear and taking another shower.

Cleaning yourself from head to toe, exiting the shower and drying yourself up, brushing out the knots in your wet hair before tying it into a braid, you changed into your nightwear—a simple, black and silk, nightdress. Walking over to your bed and pulling back the made sheets, you got underneath and rested your head against your pillow. Normally, you weren't as exhausted, but today you were feeling the weights and it was such a wonderful feeling to be engulfed by your bed.

Moments after you had shut your eyes, you knocked out. The vastness of your dream world had consumed you. Most nights—if not, all—you hardly dreamed. Or, at least you didn't remember. But, on this night, you had.

You were dreaming, and you were dreaming something that felt more like a reality than a fantasy.

Opening your eyes and finding yourself standing within the throne room, you shivered as you felt the faint breeze hit your bare arms. Looking down and realizing you were in nothing but your nightdress, your heart fluttered as you lifted your head, feeling as if you weren't alone.

And, you weren't. Turning your head to the left of you, you saw the Supreme Leader—Kylo—sitting there.

Tilting your head, unsure of what had been happening, Kylo stood from his seat and walked down then steps. Turning your body to face him as he aimed for you, you took in a deep breath. It was all silent. Not a single sound was heard... You could only _feel_. And you felt your heart racing as your body filled with goosebumps.

Coming to a stop, arms length away from you, the two of you stared— _gazed_ —at one another. Almost as if in a trance. This was something fairly new to you.

Reaching his hand out towards you, you lifted your own, fingers just about to meet with his, only for you to wake up at the sound of your holo-alarm. You could've sworn you had only been dreaming for easily five minutes. _Easily_.

Getting up after shutting your alarm, you prepared yourself for the day. Showering, changing into your uniform, eating a small breakfast and making your way to your post. Most of your duties and tasks weren't that difficult, half of the time they were delivered to you or another Aid told you. Sometimes the Supreme Leader, himself, informed you.

Today was simple, working within the palace, amongst a few officers that had been posted there. Most of your days were simple, actually. You were just an aid to Kylo Ren, helping lessen out his overflowing duties as the Supreme Leader. It was quite similar to the previous job you had when you were working with a royal family.

Making up for the lack of work done on the previous day—due to the ceremony—you finished up a bit later. Nearly every day you had to report back to the Supreme Leader with the rest of the Aid's, but (of course), today you were left alone.

Kneeling before Kylo and informing him about the duties that had been fulfilled, it was hard to look him in the eye with the dream you had of him the night before. It felt so real... _Hyperreal_. With a Force user like him, you wondered if he had known about it. Or... Maybe dreamt of it, too.

"Thank you, Y/L/N." Kylo nodded, eyeing you as you had lowered your focus, taking in a quiet, deep breath. "You may retire for the evening." He dismissed as you stood up and bowed.

Turning and walking away, you could feel Kylo's eyes burning into your backside, the feeling never leaving until the doors had shut behind you. It made you feel uneasy and a bit woozy. And you weren't sure as to why his staring was having such a strong affect on you compared to before.

Doing your nightly routine, you found yourself in your dream world—just like the night before—except this time, you were at the door of the throne room and you could feel someone on the other side of it. You were just about ready to turn the knob, but you instantly woke up to your alarm.

And it was like this for a week.

The following night, you had dreamt that you were opening the door, and there on the other side was Kylo standing there. It was always silent and the two of you always stared at one another, and just before you could make contact... you woke up.

The night after that, you were at the doorway as Kylo sat on the throne, standing up at the sight of you and aiming for you, but before he could reach you, you woke up.

After that night, you dreamt that you were standing in the hall as Kylo opened the door to you.  Yet, he couldn't reach you.

And then, on the sixth night, you two were in the hallway, either on each end. You were becoming eager but you couldn't seem to quicken your pace once you had begun walking. And, of course, as you reached out to him, you were slipped away from that alternate plane.

On the seventh night, it was the most peculiar. You weren't in the throne room, nor were you in the hall, you had found yourself walking within the palace, almost as if you had a destination. You were in your nightdress and bare feet, hair loosely tied back as you walked along the corridors. You weren't sure as to where you were going, but your feet were leading you somewhere.

Walking through a hall you had never been through before, you came to a stop before a pair of large doors, not as big as the throne rooms doors, but they were massive and a bit taller than the door for your quarters.

Reaching for the handles, the door only opened on its own as your heart skipped a beat, no one standing at the door... but, from afar was a figure. A figure just outside on a balcony.

Taking a step forward, the figure stood tall, the bright sun from the outside blocking them from being deciphered. That is until they had turned and looked at you.

The Supreme Leader.

Kylo Ren. 

Taking in a small breath as you continued taking small steps forward, he extended out his arm—just as he always had. Reaching out, in hopes this time you'd make it, your fingers brushed against his. And, just before you could fade away into the real world, his hand reached out and wrapped around your own, causing you to gasp awake with a racing heart.

Spending your day with a clouded mind, worked up in the dreams you had been having, you were pulled out of your thoughts when a stormtrooper had approached you. "The Supreme Leader requests your audience."

Sucking in a breath, you nodded. "Thank you." Watching the trooper turn away and walk off, you let out a small sigh before aiming for the throne room.

You wondered, at this point, Kylo must've felt your dreams of him... Or at least seen them. He must've known about them. It was hard to believe that he was oblivious to the matter. You wouldn't think it. For something as strange as reoccurring dreams that involved him? He must've sensed _something_.

Maybe that's why he was calling you.

Entering the throne room and making your way towards him, he stood and gestured for the Knight's to leave, causing your stomach to turn. Were you in trouble? Did he know about the dreams and maybe was disgusted by it?

"Relax, Y/L/N." Kylo said as he walked up to you, cape billowing. "You worry too much, I can feel it."

Letting out a small breath, you lowered your head. "Sorry, Supreme Leader."

"There is no need for an apology. You need to stop filling your head with lies and saying that something bad is going to happen between us." He spoke as he stopped before you. "You did nothing wrong."

Nodding your head, your eyes lowered. You wonder why it was that you were there, before him. Was he about put you on a new task? Your day was just about to end, you didn't think he'd be that cruel—at least, not to you.

"Excuse me, Supreme Leader... But, why was I requested?" You asked as Kylo grinned the slightest.

"Of course... I had told the others I will be off on a small mission with the Knight's. Work will be doubled." He informed as you nodded.

"Oh..." You breathed. "When will you return?"

"A few days. Nothing too lengthy." Kylo said as you nodded once again.

"Okay."

Looking down at you, searching your eyes, a strange surge was felt through your veins in that moment. A shiver went down your back bone as your breath lightly hitched. "You may return to whatever it was that you were doing." Kylo broke his silence as you bowed, taking one step back before turning away and walking off.

 _I've seen them, too_... A voice softly sounded within your head, almost like a whisper, causing you to stop in your tracks momentarily before exiting the throne room. Shaking the feeling off, you returned to what you had been doing before finishing up for the day, wanting to eat dinner, shower once again, and then rest.

Returning back to your quarters after you had your dinner, you opened the door, only to gasp. "S- Supreme Leader?!" Turning in your spot and shutting the doors behind you, afraid someone would see, you carefully looked over and felt your heart skip a beat at the sight before you. Kylo Ren with a completely bare torso, pants stopping just at his hip bones where the prominent v-line caught your attention.

"Y/L/N..." He lowly spoke, eyeing you as he held his undershirt in his hand. "Why are you in my chambers?" Kylo asked but your eyebrows narrowed.

"W- What do you mean? You're in mine..." You stuttered, swallowing your apprehension as you looked at him.

"Yours?" He questioned before walking over to you, you taking an involuntary step back, eyes falling to his wide chest, only to flutter and look away, a tint of red now on your cheeks. "Hmm..."

"W- What is it?" You asked, looking back at him.

"The dreams have connected us." He said as your head tilted.

"Dreams?" You breathed, only to swallow. "You've seen them... too?"

"Yes." Kylo said, looking down at you. "Every single one of them."

Blushing and feeling lightheaded, you looked down and shook your head. "I'm... I'm sorry, I can't control them, I-"

"It's alright." He said, you looking back up and taking in small breaths. "It's the work of the Force..."

Blinking, your eyes faltered as you tried steadying your breathing, nearly panicking. "I don't understand..."

"Neither do I..." Kylo lowly spoke, you shifting your eyes back to him. "But, in due time, I'm sure we will." Seeing him disappear as if he were smoke, you let out a deep breath. Whatever it was that was bringing you two together... you weren't sure how you felt about it. But you knew for a fact... you weren't bothered by it. And neither was Kylo.

━━━━━━━━━━━━

Days had passed since your encounter with Kylo, days since your strange... connection began. It wasn't something that happened once and never again, no, it was reoccurring. Just like the dreams were, except now, he was no longer in your dreams... Instead, he appeared in places before you without control, and it never ceased to make you flustered.

The two of you kept finding yourselves appearing before one another, unsure as to how. And it always happened when it was just the two of you. In the halls, in your quarters, in the training room whenever Kylo was exercising—something that always had your heart going. You even found each other in the throne room or even on his balcony. Of course, wherever you were was far different than where he was.

It was... a phenomenon of its own. You couldn't quite explain it. The Force kept bringing you two together, more often than not. Although short encounters, it somehow always got the most emotions out of you. And 99% of the time, you were flustered.

But, neither of you spoke a word about it in person. You couldn't. You _wouldn't_. No one had to know what happened behind closed doors—in this case—behind closed minds. It was just you, Kylo, and the Force at play.

As time had progressed and as the connections kept happening, you found yourself growing attached to Kylo in ways you never thought you would. You slowly broke out of your shell and confounded in him. No one else knew much about you—there really wasn't much—but, whatever amount there was, he was learning about it.

Although you didn't expect Kylo to open up to you, knowing that he had every right not to and you chose to be expressive towards him, he did speak a few times on personal matters. Faint, but, they were something. He was very closed off, but—at least with you—he had given you some access to his life. Not a lot, but some. Enough to not keep you in the dark as everyone else was.

Undressing yourself and entering your shower, feeling the water drench every inch of your as you had leaned your head back the slightest and shut your eyes, you pushed your hands through your hair and soaked it up. The water was at the right temperature, although it was a bit too hot, it made the small washroom begin to steam up. The weather was dropping and you were beginning to shiver whenever you weren't underneath your cloak or sheets. So, of course, your showers would be warm—in this case, hot.

Taking in deep breaths, lowering your head and wiping the water away from your eyes before you could open them, you pushed your hair back and opened your eyes. "K- Kylo?!" You shrieked as he was now standing before you... At least, not physically (you hoped). You were sure you would've heard him.

Not even seconds after he had appeared before you, you yelled. It wasn't his intention to appear to you while the two of you were showering in _different_ showers. He had no control over the connection. Yet, there he stood, eyes trailing down your body as you nervously covered yourself with your arms and hands. "I didn't choose to appear now." He simply spoke, eyes almost trailing as his thoughts went elsewhere.

Feeling your heart in your throat as your chest heaved, you gulped as you realized he was naked right before you as well... Except, unlike you, he _wasn't_ trying to cover himself.

Quickly looking away and acting as if you hadn't seen what you saw—although your cheeks and flowing blood begged to differ—you looked up at him.

"There's no need to worry around me." He said as he stood there, your eyebrows scrunched up as your stomach swarmed with butterflies. "This is a Force connection after all..."

Taking in a deep breath as you looked at him, Kylo's eyes gazed into your own as your heart began to throb. The way he was looking down at you was unlike any time before. "I should be upset..." You spoke, the steam surrounding the two of you as your body lightly trembled.

"But..." Kylo trailed, eyes tracing your face.

"I'm not..." You breathed, shivering at the way he was studying you.

"Maybe this happened for a reason." He said, reaching over, wondering if he could feel _something_ even if it wasn't physical contact.

"What would that be?" You asked, eyes falling to his hand as it reached for your upper arm, the tips brushing against it as you shivered once again with a faint gasp, not expecting to feel anything.

"There's more to this connection than we thought." Wrapping his hand around your arm, you could strangely feel the pressure... even the way he began to brush his thumb against your skin. "I can just barely feel you... Can you feel me?"

"Y- Yes." You nodded, watching his hand before he lifted it up and rested it against your cheek, causing you gulp.

"Interesting..." Leaning towards you, your heart began to race as you watched with wide eyes. "How about..." Seeing his face grow closer to yours as his lips hovered your own, your eyes fluttered for that moment as your lips began to tingle. "This?" Shutting your eyes, the faint pressure on your cheek was suddenly gone, causing you to open your eyes and see that Kylo, too, was gone.

Dropping your arms from covering you, your shoulders slumped. Maybe he was going a bit too far for the Force's liking? Or maybe the Force was trying to say something that couldn't be said through words...

That night, you had hardly slept, the feeling of Kylo's hands lingered all throughout and you couldn't shake it away... You didn't want to. For some reason unbeknownst to you, you wanted to be reminded. You wanted to feel _something_ even if the connection was nothing but what felt like an astral projection.

But, you _felt_ him. You felt his fingertips and his grip... You nearly felt his lips, too. And you were ashamed at how much you wanted to really feel it and not just faintly.

You wanted the physical contact and you were afraid you were going to become desperate.

Lying on your side, wide awake with a frown, you sucked in a deep breath. Kylo was all you were thinking about. He was taking over your mind. Every little thing somehow lead to him and it was making you feel things. Things you couldn't seem to describe or simply form a sentence for.

Things that had your heart going like it always had. Except, this time, in not such a fearful or anxious manner. Although still suffocating, it was for far different reasons than the norm.

Fanning your face as you rolled on to your back, you muttered. "Kylo..."

Little did you know, you were making Kylo's heart beat the same way as he lied wide awake on his bed, thinking about you and (somehow) _only_ you.

Rubbing his face as he had been staring at his ceiling, he let out a small breath before mumbling "Y/N."

Standing from his bed and pulling his pants on, Kylo lazily put on a robe. He needed to clear his mind if he wanted to get some sleep in him.

Sitting up on your bed, you looked over at your holo-alarm and saw it was half past one in the morning. Groaning, you removed your sheets and stood up, putting on slippers and tying on a robe before deciding you needed to get some air. Maybe that would help in some way, shape, or form.

You just needed to get Kylo off of your mind and you'd be fine... That's what you needed, right?

Sighing as you had exited your quarters, walking along the halls with crossed arms, you shook your head in defeat. No matter what you did—trying to eye the architecture or the seldom art, even the interior design—nothing seemed to work for you. You were just aimlessly walking around the palace.

Treading down a hall slowly, rubbing your face and pushing your hair behind your ears, you took in a some air before exhaling through your nose. You feared you were going to lose track of time and end up walking around until the sun had risen.

Not realizing you had been going down a familiar hall, you stopped just before a pair of tall and wide doors. The throne room. You hadn't realized it, but something brought you there. A faint tug in the Force that had control over you without you knowing it.

Reaching for the doors and pushing them open, you were just about to walk in, only to feel your breath hitch. "Oh... Sorry." You spoke up as Kylo had been sat on the throne, almost as if he were deep in thought before snapping out of it and looking at you.

"Y/N." He spoke, sitting up and waving for you to enter.

Doing so, shutting the doors behind you, you walked over. This was exactly what you needed, to run into the one person who had your mind all jumbled up. All thanks to your shared Force connection. "I can't seem to sleep." You admitted.

"Neither can I." He confessed as you nodded, coming to a stop before the steps. "Would you like to know why?" He pointed his hand as you took in a small breath, nodding. "You."

"Me?" You blinked as Kylo nodded.

"Yes, you." Standing up, you watched as he slowly walked down the steps in his loosely tied robe. "You have overcome my thoughts. My mind. Everything. This connection... It's taken its control. You are all that seems to be important now."

"O- Oh..."

"It's driving me mad." He said as you swallowed. "And I'm sure I'm not the only one."

Seeing him take the last step just as he was about to stand before you, you lowered your gaze, but Kylo brought it back up as he lifted your chin with a hooked finger underneath. "You're not..." You breathed.

"Mhm..." He hummed, looking you deeply in the eyes. "I can tell... You feel it just as badly as I do."

"Feel what?" You questioned as he leaned forward, face inches away from yours.

" _Everything_."

Taking in a shaky breath, Kylo lowered his head as he hesitantly reached his hands out to grab your upper arms, wishing it wasn't the silk material—rather—your skin. "I-" Cutting yourself off as your throat locked, Kylo lifted his head and looked you in the eye before bringing you closer to him, his cheek brushing against yours as he was about to whisper in your ear.

"I want it all... just as bad." Kissing under your ear, you shivered as your lungs filled. "And I know you are itching for it, too." Bringing his hands up to hold your face, his lips crashed onto yours, moving deeply as you felt his tongue come into contact with your own.

Letting out an involuntary moan, your hands clutched onto his biceps before he lowered his own on to the tie on your robe, loosening it up and pushing it right off of you to feel your skin against his palms. Trailing his hands all along your arms and grabbing your hands, he pulled you back to the throne before he sat down on it, eagerly bringing you on top of him as your slippers fell.

Kissing you so strongly, you reciprocating the movement, your shaky hands reached for his loose robe and opened it up, hands roaming his torso and nearly whimpering at the touch. Far better than you imagined. He was so broad and hard, his skin felt so smooth against your palms and you couldn't get enough. You squeezed his pecks and biceps, nails trailing as you made Kylo tremble under your touch.

Everything was moving so quickly and the two of you were feeling every bit of it. It all felt beyond the level of real, it was strange, as if all your senses were heightened.

Roaming his hands up your thighs, he lifted your night dress over your head and tossed it aside as he grunted, your bare chest meeting his as his hands slid down your back and grabbed your underwear. Sliding it right off of you as he sat it in the arm rest, Kylo lowered his pants enough as he breathed against you, the kiss becoming sloppy as your lips began to throb.

Positioning you and guiding your hips as he sat you on him, he gently pushed you down as he filled you, you sinking inch by inch as your chest heaved, a groan leaving your throat and sounding against the kiss as your hands held tightly onto his shoulders.

"O- Oh!" You breathed against him, lips parting but Kylo pulled you right back into the kiss.

Feeling your body burn up, Kylo eagerly moved your hips for you as you began to thrust against him, eyes burning with tears of pleasure from the stretch and the sensation you hadn't felt in so very long.

Wrapping your arms around him as you slipped from the kiss and rested your temple against his, your moans filled the throne room's walls as Kylo lifted his hips to meet yours. Low growls gradually increased as Kylo helped you pick up the speed of your circling hips. It was almost like a dark, twisted fantasy that Kylo was living, having sex on the throne.

And it felt far greater than anything else he had ever experienced.

Building up a sweat, moaning and groaning as muffled curses and growls left Kylo, the two of you held tightly onto one another as the heat was building up within either of you.

"Oh, Kylo..." You heavily breathed, eyebrows scrunching up as your fingers now gripped tightly onto his hair.

"J- Just a bit more." He grunted, soon reaching his climax. "F- Fu- ck-" Biting down, lifting his hips to meet yours, your heart fluttered as you came, spilling all over him before he came  
moments after.

"Kylo..." You panted as he lifted your hips, sitting you on his lap and kissing your cheek. "Kylo, th- this connection..."

"What about it?" He asked, looking at you as he took in a deep breath.

"I- I..." Sighing, you looked him in the eyes. "I think I love you..."

Resting his hand against the back of your neck, looking deeply into your eyes before he pulled you into a kiss, he muttered against your lips. "I've been in love with you."


	4. Four Years

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happens after four years of separation from the person you were once engaged to?

" _Will you marry me?"_ The voice rang in your head, the faint memory filling your thoughts as you found yourself sitting in the passenger seat of your boyfriends car.

Looking out the window as your elbow was resting against it, you bit your thumb nail, unable to snap out of your trance. " _M— Marry— Kylo... I— Oh my gosh, of course!" Smiling at him as he placed the engagement ring on, you instantly tackled him into a kiss._

The two of you were too young, you would soon become 18 as Kylo had already been. Graduation was a few months away and summer would soon start... But college was what got in the way of things.

High school sweethearts, was what you liked to call it. Getting engaged and marrying during your senior year before real life had struck. You were so happy. So in love... And you knew he was the one.

But then the end of summer came and you were about to move away for college. You wanted to make a compromise, to go to the university close to home but Kylo knew it was always your dream to get out of your hometown and explore.

He never wanted to hold you back... and that's why he called off your marriage to him. Although you two weren't officially married, he had ended it the moment you were about to take your flight.

You remembered the pain you felt in your heart, how it felt as if someone tore it out... Stepped on it, tore it apart, and burnt it to a crisp. You were a sobbing mess, cheeks running with tears and body trembling. Kylo did everything to keep you calm, holding you to his chest and muffling out your cries, but you couldn't take it. You had to leave.

And so, four years later, you found yourself driving to an anniversary party with your boyfriend. The first boyfriend you had after all that happened with Kylo.

You moved on.

"We're here, honey." Your boyfriend—Alexander—said as he parked his car in the driveway, snapping you out of your haze.

"Thanks." You smiled over at him before getting out of the car, waiting for him as you reached your hand out for him to hold.

It was Han and Leia's 25th anniversary since they had married and they wanted to celebrate, inviting dozens of people—including you. Although you and Kylo had been separated, the couple never lost contact with you. They adored you.

Knocking on the door as you stepped closely to Alexander, the door opened to the sight of Rey. "Y/N?" She nearly whispered as you smiled. "Oh, wow, it's been so long!" She laughed, pulling you into an embrace before looking at the man beside you. Dirty blonde hair, light skin that had some color, built... He had a nice aura about him. "And... Who is this?" She asked.

"Alex." You introduced. "My boyfriend..."

Blinking and lifting her brows, Rey looked at you for a moment, then over to Alex as she stuck her hand out for him to shake. "Rey..." She introduced herself. It almost seemed as if she forced a smile—and you couldn't help but feel a bit uncomfortable. After all... Rey was Kylo's cousin.

"So, where's Han and Leia?" You asked with a wide grin, trying to move passed the awkwardness.

"Right, uh, in the backyard." She pointed, moving to a side as you then walked in. Some of the guests were spread throughout while most were outside.

Greeting those you had recognized—Luke, Finn, Poe, Rose, and Kaydel—you had introduced your boyfriend to them as they kindly responded.

From afar, a trio watched. Standing at a corner with drinks in their hands, Phasma, Kylo, and Hux watched. "And... Who is that?" Hux asked as he lowered his sunglasses.

"Seems as if Y/N has a new boyfriend. It's quite obvious." Phasma huffed, watching you hold your boyfriend's hand.

Kylo stood quietly, eyeing you and only you. You had cut your hair, you seemed more mature, you were dressed so... nicely, as if you were already a married woman working a high paid job. A beige coat covering the dress you were in and matching heels. You even had a purse in your free hand. You changed so much since the last time he saw you... And it was hard not to stare when you were right there... _smiling_.

"At least she's happy." Kylo optimistically spoke. He didn't want to seem bitter or jealous. After all, he was the one who left you. He should be happy that you found happiness elsewhere...

But, of course, it was hard to when his feelings for you never left. Always a wound in his heart that would never heal.

So, he kept his distance. Plus, he didn't associate much with his family... He was a changed person, too. Ever since he left you.

Hours had passed and you were having a great time, catching up with your old gang of friends, even speaking to Luke for a bit. You sat closely beside Alex, holding his hand or arm, even knee, resting your head on his shoulder... Everyone could tell you were in love.

Everyone except Rey. Rey was skeptical and she knew if her cousin—wherever he was hiding with his so called friends—wouldn't enjoy the sight.

"This is so sweet." You spoke up as you were sitting beside Alex. "25 years is a lot. I mean, I know people who've passed 50... but, still." Eyeing Han and Leia with a smile as they stood close to one another, you then looked over to Alex, only to see he was holding something in his hand.

"Then... let that be us." He spoke, opening up the small velvet box that presented an engagement ring. "We've only been dating for a year but... It's been absolutely wonderful. And you've graduated recently and now you have a job and you're so successful at such a young age and I am so proud of you, Y/N..." Alex breathed as you sat there with wide eyes and racing heart. "Will you marry me?"

Hearing a few gasps from those around you, you nodded your head as Alex grinned, pulling out the ring and slipping it on your finger, instantly pulling you into a kiss as you laughed.

"Oh, gosh, let me see the ring!" Rose squealed as she rushed up to you as you stood up, others gathering to eye it. "It's gorgeous!"

"Thank you." You chuckled, Poe and Finn eyeing it as Kaydel pushed through to see.

Moving over to Han and Leia, Leia gasped and held your hand. "Oh, wow! This is beautiful..." She nodded. Even though you _were_ engaged to her son, she still was happy for you. She didn't want to seem as if she was still heartbroken over the breakup... Even if she knew very well her son _still_ was.

"Good luck to you, and let's hope you hit 25 years." Han winked as you smiled.

"Thanks, where's Rey?" You asked.

"Uh... I think I saw her walking to the front yard..." Leia answered as you nodded.

"Ah, okay, thank you!" Rushing off, you aimed for the front door and opened it,  
spotting Rey speaking to Phasma and Hux—a rather odd sight seeing as she seemed as if she hadn't even known them. "Rey, hey, I was looking for you!"

"Sorry, I was out here." She apologized as she watched you walk over to her, you not realizing that Kylo was out on the grass, kicking a ball amongst himself... Hands deep in his pants a he got lost in his own world. "What is it?"

"Alex proposed..." You said, lifting your hand as Rey felt her breath hitch, Phasma's eyebrows lifting as Hux slightly shook his head... The blonde and ginger were sure their dark haired friend had heard this.

"He— He proposed?" Rey stuttered as you nodded. She didn't seem so excited like everyone else. "Wow... Wow, that's... That's great!" She said, almost as if she was forcing it out but you were too excited to even notice.

"Thank you! Ahh... I can't believe it." You chuckled as Hux and Phasma awkwardly looked away, you lifting your focus, only to see Kylo looking at you. This had been the first time, throughout the party, that either of you made eye contact... And the sight of him so easily sucked your excitement away. You could almost see the pain in his eyes, the way his eyebrows were fighting not to scrunch up as he stared at you.

Sucking in a breath and looking away, you smiled at Rey before walking back inside. You knew that was the end of the party.

* * *

 

A few days had passed since Han and Leia's 25th anniversary party and you decided to stay in town for the winter break. Now that you had lived elsewhere, the only times you could see your family was for holidays. So, you spent it catching up with them, even hanging out with your friends and showing Alex around the city you grew up in.

But, as you were trying to enjoy your vacation, Kylo lingered on the back of your mind. That moment the two of you exchanged eye contact, you felt something in your heart that you never had before... It was indescribable but it was almost as if an imprint was left behind.

Visiting your parents home, you decided to go into your old bedroom—your parents still weren't ready to clear it out even if you had moved out so long ago.

Everything was the same, nothing out of place, except for the missing items you had taken with you. Old books, posters, movies... Merchandise and memorabilia... Even photos from high school that you had framed were still there.

Smiling to yourself as you had picked up one—you with Rey, Finn, and Poe—you placed it down before walking around your room... only to see something sticking out the bottom of your bed.

Moving to your knees and pulling it out, you gulped. The words **_Do Not Open_** written in black marker made your mood drop. You should've listened to your own advice, but, you couldn't. You opened it anyway. You opened it and instantly felt your heart sank.

It was filled to the top, photos upon photos, gifts and love letters, dead flowers and little objects that represented memories. Pulling things out as you bit your tongue, feeling your heart race as your stomach turned, eyeing images of you and Kylo, your eyes began to well up with tears. Blinking them away as you lifted a few frames and objects, a small image caught your attention.

You knew you shouldn't have pulled it out. You knew you shouldn't have pulled the picture out... But, you had to.

Furrowing your eyebrows as more tears had built up, blocking your vision, you sniffled as you wiped them away. Looking at the photo, your heart shattered. It was the day he had proposed to you, Rey had taken the photo of you the moment you had said yes.

Taking in a deep breath as you eyed it, you couldn't help but breakdown. The tears slipping and streaming down your cheeks as you stared at the engagement ring in the image.

It made your heart ache. It made your body shake... You looked at it, and then over to the one that now claimed your ring finger and let out a small whimper.

You thought you had moved on... but, you hadn't.

You still loved Kylo. Even after all those years of building yourself back up and moving on. You _still_ loved him.

Hearing a knock on your door, your breath hitched as you wiped your tears, placing everything back into the box and shoving it under your bed before you stood up to answer the door. It was Christmas day and your parents were holding an early dinner and had invited over guests—including the Solo's and Skywalker's... So it was no surprise to see Leia at your door.

"Hi, sweetie, your mother wanted me to let you know that dinner is ready." She softly smiled as you nodded, giving her a small thank you before walking off.

Looking into your room, Leia saw a box stick out from under your bed... and, sticking out from the lid, a picture of you and Kylo. She knew you were crying, you couldn't hide that fact from her so easily.

Sitting quietly throughout dinner, hardly talking to anyone—not even Alex—as you pushed your food around, you sat with a small hunch. Every now and then you had lifted your focus and made eye contact with Kylo... as if he had already been looking at you, and it was breaking your heart even more.

You couldn't look into his honey brown eyes, not when they looked so saddened. He hadn't said a word to you and you hadn't said a thing to him, and no one acknowledged this, they left you two be. But, there was a tension, and two people had noticed it. Two people that weren't you and Kylo... And one was Rey.

Now standing with Alex, as your parents were with you—amongst Han and Leia—your focus went elsewhere... To Kylo. He was sat on the couch, alone. Rey was with Phasma and Rose, leaving Kylo to himself. He didn't care, he didn't want much company anyway.

Just about to look away, you sucked in a breath as Kylo looked over at you for a moment as you felt your heart flutter. Looking away, unable to take it anymore, you turned to face Alex. "Can we talk in private?" You asked him as he nodded. Grabbing his hand and walking towards the front of the house, you bit your inner lip.

"What is it?" Alex asked. He noticed how uneasy you were.

"I— I can't do it." You shook your head with a small frown. "I'm sorry... I can't... I can't marry you."

Blinking, Alex sucked in a breath and eyed you for a moment, seeing how your eyes were watery. "You still love him, don't you?" He asked as you frowned even more.

You stood silent, not saying a single thing but looking down and taking off the engagement ring before placing it on his palm. Not bothering to look at him, you walked around his figure and exited your house.

What you hadn't known was that Rey, Phasma, and Rose had overheard this... And so had Kylo.

Standing up and following out as Kylo watched them, he blinked and looked down. He knew he couldn't get involved.

Rushing out and splitting up, Rey went left and sprinted down the sidewalk, instantly spotting you as you held tightly onto your red coat. "Y/N! Y/N, wait!" Rey called out.

"Leave me alone, please..." You cried out, sniffling and shaking as you had let out your tears.

"Y/N, please..." Slowing her pace and catching up to you, Rey held your hand. "Please, it's too cold outside—"

"I— I just need to be left alone, please!" You begged, whimpering, but Rey refused to leave your side.

"No." Rey shook her head as you sobbed. "I will not. I am not leaving you to cry alone and suffer alone."

Sucking in a shaky breath, you shut your eyes and shook your head. "I miss him... I miss Kylo... I didn't know how much I missed him until I saw him..." You whimpered. "I kept myself busy with a new boyfriend so I wouldn't think about him. A new boyfriend who was nothing like Kylo. A man who was social and super friendly and was open. Who was a major extrovert and loved to party and to be around others. But now everything has crashed down and I realized I don't want someone who is the complete opposite... I want Kylo. I always have..." You gulped, slipping from Rey's grip and walking off.

Standing there and watching you walk off, Rey turned and walked up to Rose and Phasma. "She still loves him."

"Did she tell you that?" Phasma asked.

"No... But she said she misses him and still wants him. She always has..." Rey sighed as she looked down.

Making your way to a pier you visited often during your childhood, you tightened your coat around you as the weather dropped increasingly, the winds growing heavier from the ocean. Although it was Christmas and very cold, plenty of people still were out, celebrating.

Quietly walking by yourself, you heard footsteps approaching on the wooden surface as you sighed. "Please, let me be..." You said without turning. Rey and Rose now standing on either side of you before you quickened your pace.

"We should let her be for a bit." Rose said, but Rey shook her head.

"She needs us." Rey responded, about to follow you, but as you were about to rush off, your heart skipped a beat as you saw Kylo approaching you from the distance.

Backing up and not watching where you were going as your foot got caught over a chain link, you slipped right out of your shoe and shrieked as you fell over into the ice cold water.

"Y/N!" Kylo shouted as he ran as fast as he could, removing his jacket and tossing it to a side.

"Y/N!" Rey called out, panicking, only to see her cousin dive into the water.

"Oh my gosh..." Rushing off, Rose went to buy a blanket as Phasma sprinted over and grabbed Kylo's coat.

Bringing you to the surface with him, Kylo held you close to him as you trembled violently, gasping for air as he swam over to the pier. "It's okay... It's okay, I have you." He said as you were crying, _panicking_.

"Here!" Rey called out, lending a hand as Phasma helped, the two on their knees as Kylo lifted you up enough for the two to pull you out just before Kylo could.

Shivering in your spot as Phasma placed Kylo's coat over your shoulders, Kylo brought you into his chest and held you close to him as Rose rushed back with a blanket, draping the two of you with it. Wiping your hair from your face as he left kisses on top of your head and on your temples, you buried yourself into him as you kept your eyes shut.

Calling a cab to pick the five of you up, Rey looked over at you and Kylo, smiling at the sight—although at terrible circumstances—she knew the two of you still had the love for one another.

Picking you up in his arms as the three girls lead the way to the cab, Rose sat in the front as Phasma and Rey took the back, you sitting on Kylo's lap, still trembling as he held you to him. Rubbing your thighs and arms, even your back, you nuzzled your face into the crook of his neck. You just needed him there, with you, even if he was just as soaked.

Making it back to your house, being bombarded by thousands of questions, Kylo ignored them all and left that to the girls as he brought you to your old bedroom. Sitting you on your bed, grabbing you a new set of clothes and helping you change as you shivered, Kylo couldn't help but constantly look into your eyes as you sat there with a pout. He felt awful for scaring you the way he had but he was glad that you were okay now.

Bringing you under your sheets, Phasma rushed in with a bunch of blankets as Rose set up a heater, Rey brining in hot chocolate as they all surrounded you. They had you covered and Kylo knew it was better that way.

Leaving the bedroom and joining everyone else, Leia looked at him with confusion. "What are you doing? Why aren't you with her?" She asked.

"She's better off with friends." He simply answered but Leia shook her head, extending her arms out.

"Change into this and join her. She wants you more than anyone else." She insisted as Kylo looked down at the clothes she had in her hands—something she must've been able to get. " _Go_."

Sucking in a breath, Kylo listened to his mother and instantly changed, making his way back up to your room where the three girls decided it was best to leave you two be.

Looking over at Kylo, seeing him in different clothing, you sucked in a breath. "I am so sorry that—"

Walking up to you, Kylo held your face and pressed his lips against your own, cutting you off. Feeling you kiss him back so quickly, he pulled away and joined you under the sheets, holding you close to him. "I still love you... I always have."

Smiling to yourself, you held him tightly, enjoying the close proximity and the feeling of his skin. "I never stopped loving you, either." You confessed as he tightened his hold around you.

"I know it's too soon... But I want to pick things up where we left it." He said, reaching into his shirt and pulling out a chain as you sat up enough to look at him. "I've worn it ever since you left. For these past four years. I never took it off... I couldn't." He admitted as you teared up.

"Kylo..."

"I want to be with you forever... And I don't give a damn anymore, nothing will hold us back. I'll do anything to have you in my life for as long as we breathe." He said, looking you in the eyes. "Please, take me back."

Blinking away your tears, you nodded with a smile. "Of— Of course!" You laughed, Kylo removing the ring from the chain and placing it back on your finger. "I feel awful for what I pulled on Alex but... but you and I were meant to be..." You said, eyeing the engagement ring as you smiled.

Reaching to cup your cheek, Kylo leaned in and kissed you. "Always and forever."


	5. The Knight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request: Luke said that Kylo had taken a few of his students with him, which we're all assume to be the Knights of Ren. Can you write something on Ben Solo's thoughts as he was bringing destruction to the Temple and how he was choosing those who came with him, with the reader being included as one of those lucky survivors. Ps. You're amazing omg I love you + You know what would be amazing to see? Seeing the creation of an actual force bond that's not just a manipulation. Supreme Leader Ren and his special knight, (Y/N). That would be fun to see!

An unbearable shift in the Force had woken you up from your slumber. It wasn't the greatest sleep you had, for some strange reason, you were afraid to sleep that night.

Something in the Force had warned you... had pulled at you, but you couldn't tell as to what. It left an uneasy feeling in your chest the entirety of the time you lied in bed until you had fallen asleep.

But then you woke up, and the feeling was there again. But _worse_.

Taking in deep breaths, you woke up in a sweat, eyes searching your room as if to find any disturbance in the Force... yet, you found nothing.

Swallowing through a dry throat, you took in a deep breath as you sat up. Something wasn't right. But what was it?

Lying on his side, eyes shut with a steady pace of his breathing, Ben could sense his own uncle creep up on him from behind. He could feel his intentions. He wanted to kill him.

 _Snoke was right_. Ben thought.

Clutching onto his lightsaber, Luke's jaw tightened. He couldn't do it. How could he kill his own nephew?

But there was so much darkness in him... so much _evil_.

Reaching over for his lightsaber, Ben quickly activated it as he turned. With a swift movement, his free hand reached out and instantly clenched.

He was going in for the kill.

This was just the beginning he was going to end the Jedi once and for all. Something his grandfather couldn't do.

Hearing the sound of walls crumbling, distant screams and and fire crackling, you looked out the window. With wide eyes, you watched as a fire began to burn the temple. Then, your attention was caught by the sound of lightsabers clashing. You _knew_ something was wrong.

Instantly standing from your bed, you reached out for you lightsaber as it flew into your hand. Not even bothering to pull on a robe, you rushed out of the room and into the halls. The lights were flickering and a sense of distress and terror was heavy on your shoulders.

Focusing on the Force, you quickened your pace. It had to be stopped. You had to do something. You couldn't let them get away with it.

Sprinting out of the temple and into the frigid atmosphere, the smell of fire burning filled your knees. The heat from it was patting against your skin, instantly bringing sweat to your forehead.

Searching the area, your eyes instantly landed on a pair of lightsabers clashing against one another—a blue one and a green one. Ben and... one of your fellow Jedi. They were neck at neck, and you could easily tell who had the upper hand.

You had to do something, you had to stop them.

Not wasting any time, you rushed over, heart racing within your chest as you kept your eyes latched onto Ben's moving body. This wasn't going to end well, this wasn't going to have a good outcome if you hadn't done something.

Clenching your jaw as you broke into a sprint, you instantly activated your lightsaber and saw red. You were going in for the kill as they were.

With a swift twirl of your lightsaber and a bend in the knee, your fiery weapon came crashing through, slicing through the air.

Slicing the Jedi pupil in half.

Shifting his eyes over to you for a moment, seeing the fire within them, Ben took in a deep breath. He could easily tell where your loyalty had lied at that very moment. And it wasn't to the light... nor was it to Luke.

It was to the darkness.

It was to _him_.

He had five people in mind who he'd let survivor. A handful of Jedi that he'd let live if they agreed to be taken under his wing. The group being those he could easily sense the darkness within. Something so fragile, yet, so easily manipulated.

Ben knew, from the very beginning, who was going to survive from who wasn't. And one of the first people to take his side was you. The first person he had in mind.

The rest? They were nothing to him. Nothing but a block in his path. A bump in the road. A _disease_ that had to be rid of.

Keeping his eyes set on you as you had to his own, Ben knew he could put his full trust in you. He knew this since the very moment he had met you. And you knew this as well.

There was something there, something strong but never unveiled. Not until that moment where you killed that student just to protect Ben.

With the intensity in his eyes, and the fire in your own, no words had to be spoken. No, just actions that had to be taken. With a swift turn, you and Ben were back to back, finishing off the last few of the Jedi that would try and take either of you down.

You couldn't tell what it was, but something surged through your veins. Something so strong and powerful.

Something Ben was feeling as well.

The two of you were quick with your feet and arms, swinging your lightsabers and murdering anyone who dared get in your way. Down to the last four that now stood in front of you two. Their lightsabers were in their hold, but there was no sign of them wanting to activate them and use it against you two.

No, they had something else in mind.

 **Abandonment**.

"This is the end of the Jedi. Join me, and we will bring justice to the Force. Rule the galaxy and finish what the Empire could never." Ben spoke with a clenched fist, the other four students nodding their heads. "Show your loyalty." Seeing them, one by one, fall on one knee, Ben took in a deep breath before extending his hand, his now deactivated lightsaber floating above his palm.

With a swift full in the force, the lightsaber was ripped into pieces, metal bending and snapping at his will as the Kyber Crystal cracked.

"The darkness will guide us to victory. The light will be severed." At that, the four in front of him had done the same with their own blades, watching them fall apart and pile up on the ground.

Turning to look at you, Ben bowed his head before you reached your hand out, eyes on his but focus on your lightsaber. In a matter of seconds, your lightsaber had become like the rest of theirs. _Nothing_. A pile of metal. A separation from the light and the Jedi.

It was time for the Jedi to end.

Years had passed since the dark turn Ben Solo had taken, now falling under the alias that was Kylo Ren. It brought in a whole new person within himself. Someone stronger... someone more powerful.

Someone full of pent up rage and anger.

Someone who was able to defeat the man that held him back from fulfilling his destiny.

And it wasn't entirely Luke... no, it was _Snoke_.

Snoke was holding him back from becoming what he was meant to be. The most powerful Force user there ever was.

The Supreme Leader of the First Order.

Sitting on what he now claimed to be his throne, surrounded by the four knights he had taken with him from the temple, Kylo leaned his chin into his knuckles.

"They have failed to retrieve the data we needed from the new Resistance allies..." Hux spoke as he was on one knee, head low. A hint of him was afraid to even make eye contact, knowing very well Kylo had nothing to hold him back from killing Hux. He knew he could do it with a simple snap of his fingers.

"They?" Kylo questioned, sitting up straight and leaning forward. "Or, you?"

Gulping, Hux lifted his head and looked at Kylo. "Excuse me, supreme leader... I should have-" Choking on his own words, Kylo stood up and walked down the throne and towards Hux.

"You will not fail me, general. Just like how you never failed our miserable, previous Supreme Leader. You will get me what I need. You will make sure your men try harder. And you will make sure not to disappoint me." Kylo spoke through gritted teeth as he glared down at Hux, the man choking and gasping. "Understood?"

Rapidly nodding his head, Hux fell forward as Kylo had let go of his grip. "Yes... S-supreme Leader."

"Good. Get out of my sight." He waved a hand, sending Hux flying back towards the door.

Turning away and returning to his throne, Kylo felt a tug in the Force. He knew very well he couldn't answer to it then, not when he was surrounded.

"Wait outside." He said to the knights. "Make sure he doesn't waste a second lying there."

Bowing their heads, the four knights moved over to Hux, pulling him right out and leaving Kylo on his own as he sat back down on his throne, taking in a deep breath.

"Where are you?" He asked, looking as if he were talking to nothing.

"I'm here." You said, although not physically there, Kylo could still see you through the Force.

"You should be beside me." He said. "Being that extra support I make myself believe I don't need."

"You will always have my support, Kylo." You said, looking at him. " _Always_."

Taking in a deep breath, he stood once again from his throne, walking towards you. "Hux failed me."

"And that's a surprise?" You lifted an eyebrow, looking at him. "He only tried his hardest around Snoke because he wanted the title once Snoke was no longer capable of standing his ground. Yet, here you are. Supreme Leader."

"That should not be a reason as to why he is not trying." Kylo seethed, shaking his head. "This is why I've made you the Admiral. You won't fail me. You never do."

"Of course not." You said, eyeing him as he came to a stop in front of you. "You have my loyalty, trust, and respect. No one else."

"I know." Kylo nodded, looking at you. "This bond... what we have. It fuels me."

"As it does to me."

"Under Snoke's watch... I could hardly harness the capabilities our bond offered us. He would've used it against me. Used it as a weapon to torture me." Kylo clenched his fists. "He had to be executed. He was holding me down."

"It was about time." You smirked. "Snoke was blind. He was weak... he was useless. He lacked power. He only attracted fear... but even then, he wasn't intimidating enough. He failed." You reminded. "You won't. You will bring us victory. I know it to be true."

Listening to your words as you looked him in the eye, Kylo reached out, through the Force as his hand shifted. He wanted you there beside him... not just a Force projection of you. You were the only person that he seemed to have cared for. The only person he wanted around.

The knights weren't much compared to you. You were Kylo's other half. You were the one that kept him in line when he wavered. You were the one who defended him to no end.

You were the one who took his side to defeat Snoke. The one to help end his ruling.

You were loyal to him.

And he was loyal to you.

"You need to return." He said, gloved hand resting against your cheek, you hardly feeling it, but the tingling sensation was there. "You need to prevent me from ripping Hux's head off."

"Soon." You nodded. "I will be back, to be beside you. "

"Soon isn't soon enough."

"I'm well aware." You sighed, your own hand reaching out, gloveless and bare... resting against his cheek as he took in a deep breath. "This is just the beginning. We will crush the Resistance and bring justice to the galaxy. And with you as our Supreme Leader, we will make things right."

Nodding, Kylo's hand fell to the back of your neck as he moved closer to you, enough to have only a data-pad fit between the two of you. "My most special knight..." Kylo began, eyes jumping around your face. "Your faith in me never falters."

"I believe in the bond." You said, feeling his Force rub against your own, even if he wasn't truly there.

"I believe in us." Kylo said, lowering himself just enough to angle his head. "Together..." Hovering his lips against yours, he spoke before he closed the small gap, the soon-to-be kiss not real but was easily felt as if it were, "we will rule the galaxy."


	6. Longing (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request: My love you are a genius and master of your craft. Could I request a Last Jedi situation where after Kylo kills Snoke, he's overwhelmed with his feelings and instability he feels and seeks comfort from the reader aka love of his life. Give me all the feels and maybe a little nsfw?

It played out so easily in front of him, as if he were reliving it. The way he carefully pulled his two fingers back beside him as Anakin's—his grandfather's—lightsaber slowly turned to aim at Snoke. The venomous words dripping from the ex Supreme Leader's tongue ringing in his ears. He could see it, the way Snoke had been speaking and completely unaware of what his apprentice had been doing. Bringing the enemy down.

And that was Snoke.

The ways Snoke's body sliced in half as he sat on his throne removed a weight that had once lied on Kylo's shoulders. The relief of removing the one person that was holding him back, preventing him from becoming what he was meant to be. Holding him back from getting what he wanted... being where he was meant to be.

And that was on the throne. Being the new Supreme Leader. Earning the respect he deserved from those who were now beneath him.

"Our new Supreme Leader, huh? Never thought mister temper tantrum would get that far..." A stormtrooper had spoken to one of their comrades.

"Better be careful with what you say, he can easily slaughter any of us now and get away with it. Probably what happened with the previous Supreme Leader."

Hearing the words of the pair of stormtroopers as you had been sauntering down that exact hall, hands behind yourself with your head held high, you spoke up as you passed them by, "I suggest you bite your tongue when speaking about the Supreme Leader, you never know who's listening and could let it slip if they ever speak to him."

Instantly straightening their backs as you had spoken to the two, their hearts skipped a beat as they bit down on their tongues. You were the Admiral, one of the highest in command and they knew very well it wasn't wise to, in simple terms, trash talk the Supreme Leader... especially when you were walking by.

Aiming for the bridge, you let out a small breath, thinking about how Kylo Ren was now the Supreme Leader. You couldn't help but feel... satisfied with the change. Although you'd never admit to it. It wasn't like you were in bad standing. No, everyone respected you.

Everyone including Hux and the belated Snoke.

Even Kylo himself.

But what he felt for you was beyond respect. No, it was admiration and fascination. The way you took command and lead the First Order, far better than Hux possibly could ever.

Sadly, unlike his ability to be around Hux, he rarely got to be around you. You seemed far more busier than the ginger, even if your position was much like his own. And, unlike Hux, you put all your hard work and pride into the First Order without letting your emotions get the best of you.

Entering the bridge and overlooking the men and women at work, you slowly nodded, satisfied with their progress. Now that Kylo was taking control, things were more in line... to many people's surprise. Things were actually getting done. Unlike Snoke, Kylo was more aware and interactive. More assertive and more... intimidating.

At least, to everyone else. Maybe not much to you. You respected him too much to even be fearful. You knew of his capabilities.

"No survivors or anyone remaining on Crait, but there are those who have escaped. They are the spark that will bring back the Rebellion and we must be cautious. We do not need this war to get any worse than it already was." You spoke. "Good job blocking those signals from those responding to the Resistance, there is no need of them getting help." Turning your head ahead, looking at the viewpoint, you took in a deep breath. The battle of Crait was successful in the sense that you made sure no one in the galaxy would reach out to help the Resistance. You needed to keep them from growing in numbers... in which you knew would soon happen again.

Striding down the hall that lead to the bridge, Kylo's calculated pace slowed down as his eyes landed on an all white figure. The only white figure in the sea of black. You.

You stuck out out of every other officer in the Order, the all white jumpsuit you wore and attached cape gave away who you were. The only person in white and a hint of red and black.

Kylo couldn't help but keep his eyes locked on you, eyeing your figure as you gazed out at the stars, surrounded by your men who worked their damnedest to keep the First Order striving. His eyes trailed from your styled hair in its up-do, down the cape that hid your curves. He hated how he could hardly see your true figure with your back facing him. Each time he was able to see the front side of you, it made his heart race.

You were what he wanted. What he's always desired. The woman with the upper hand who gained the upmost respect.

And he could never have you because of Snoke. Snoke prevented him from doing anything Kylo wished and longed for.

But now, now Kylo was in control. Now Kylo was the Supreme Leader and he could now do whatever it was that he pleased. Especially if that meant making you his.

Feeling eyes boring into your back, you took in a small breath. You knew who it was, as if you could easily pinpoint who the eyes belonged to. The one person that made you flustered just by simple eye contact because you knew what his gaze meant. You knew what he held behind those hazel eyes.

Lust, desire, greed, power... you.

 _The only person I'll ever be proud of_. His words echoed within your head as you blinked, swallowing at the sound of his husky, low voice. He projected his thoughts into your own and it felt as if he had been whispering them in your ear, making you shiver.

It was fairly new, the way Kylo would praise you, tell you how much he appreciated your work and how you handled situations. He loved reminding you how much you were of worth and very much needed. And sometimes, he just was too eager to tell you in person that he had to tell you through your _thoughts_.

Looking over your shoulder, your eyes trailed up to that of Kylo's. The pair that had already been staring intently at you, as if trying to bore the image of you into his brain. The intense gaze always had the hair on your skin rise as goosebumps grew.

The look in his eyes, as if he were looking into your soul, made your heart skip a beat. No one had ever made you feel this way before. Especially through just their _eyes_. And Kylo's eyes said everything and nothing all together. It was that fierce. _So, very proud of you_.

Taking in a small breath as you felt your cheeks heat up, you looked away. You couldn't let your officers see you blushing. Blushing was a very uncommon thing to see on your face. It was rare for anyone to win your heart or to even make you feel the way you were feeling now. The heat in your face... the heat in between your thighs. You couldn't let this get the best of you, not when you were a leading member of the First Order.

Not when Kylo Ren was the Supreme Leader and had far more important matters to deal with than purposefully making you feel worked up.

Feeling a grin growing on his lips, Kylo turned away as he knew that would be enough staring... at least, for now.

That is of course until some time had passed you by in the day, you moving about the ship to get things done, only to see Kylo walking towards you. You tried keeping your composure, not making his newfound gaze get the best of you as you had looked over at him. But how could you when he was looking at you as if you were the stars in the night sky that twinkled so brightly?

"Supreme Leader." You bowed your head out of respect, expecting him to keep walking on, but then he got a hold of you, hand on your shoulder as he stopped you in your tracks.

"Admiral Y/L/N." He spoke, voice rumbling to the point you could almost feel it in your chest. "I am very thankful for the work you have put into this organization. What you did on Crait, preventing the Resistance from receiving any help... it was superb." He praised as you simply nodded your head once, heart moving up your throat. You couldn't seem to understand as to how... or why Kylo was getting to you so easily when he never did before.

Before, he was just the commander you always heard about but hardly saw. You were on a different ship and never had the chance to even be around him. But now, now you were around him more than you possibly could have imagined. And you were quite grateful for it.

"Thank you, but there is no need for praising. I do this for the Order. For what is right." You spoke, the ends of Kylo's lips curving upwards as your heart fluttered.

Standing there and looking at you, not bothering to hide the fact that he was eyeing your body—how your outfit hugged your curves and how you held your hands together in front of you, making your chest more prominent.

You were anxious. He could feel it so easily through the Force. And you were antsy. Your blood was pumping ever so quickly through your veins as your heart began to echo in your ears. He was making you feel this way and he knew it very well. He was almost proud of himself... to the point he was _smirking_.

He was getting this far and he was going to keep going until he got you right where he wanted you.

"Well, it's me showing my gratitude. I am thankful to have you, help me, lead these men and women to victory." He softly spoke, resisting the urge to stroke your cheek or even hold your chin. He wasn't going to push just yet...

"It's an honor, Supreme Leader." You spoke, almost low enough for your voice to crack. He was making your insides twist as your knees pressed together. Just by the way he was looking down at you, so closely and carefully, you could hardly even tell if you were breathing or not. You were so caught up in the man in front of you.

It wasn't till then you had noticed his features. The dark hair that nearly touched his shoulders, so full of volume. The beauty marks and freckles that peppered all across the soft skin on his face. The deep scar... the imperial and sharp nose that you could only imagine- _No, don't think about it_. The plush and pink lips, his jaw, the cheek bones. Then... his eyes, the eyes that looked so keenly into your own. The eyes that made you want to break out into a sweat. The eyes that looked as if they were tearing your clothes to shreds as if it were so easy to do.

He was something else, something so foreign to you. Not a man most would call the ideal kind. No, he was different. Unusual. Remarkable.

He was beautifully unconventional.

"I'm sure you're a busy woman, I will let you be." He spoke, breaking your deep thoughts that had you lost in another universe.

With a single bow of his head and one deep look into your eyes, Kylo walked away, leaving you standing there as you took in a deep breath. Almost as if you hadn't been breathing. Almost as if you had forgotten how to breathe.

Feeling lightheaded, you rubbed your face before walking away. Kylo treated you far differently from anyone else and you were unsure how you felt. Even if you, deep down, believed that you were... lucky. To have _that_ man's interest, respect and attention... it said something.

That day would end up longer than you had imagined. No thanks to your intoxicating thoughts about Kylo Ren. _The_ Supreme Leader.

Lying on your oversized bed, dressed in a silk set nightwear, a buttoned up top and pants, you couldn't help but shift in your sleep. Your dreams weren't normally like this. No, they never were. You hardly dreamed with the stress of your job. It was rare.

Yet, here you were, in a world that felt so surreal... A world that felt hyperreal, as if it were happening in the now.

"I want to give you anything and everything. All that you could ever dream of. The galaxy... The _universe_." Lying underneath Kylo, bare skin to bare skin, your eyes clenched shut as your body grew hot. Eyebrows tightly knitted as you but your bottom lip. The feeling of his breath against your neck as his hands held your own above your head. You were panting. Your face was red.

No, you weren't scared. You were flustered. Beyond flustered and turned on. "I will give you my all. My life. My being. I will protect you from all that is cruel. I will let no man hurt you. I will let no man have you." Kylo's words were making your chest heave as you felt him against you, the way he was so close and intimate with you, how your bodies felt so perfect against one another.

"No one can have you. No one could have dared taking you away from me."

"No. You are mine."

"Mine and only mine."

Waking up in a sweat, wide eyes searching your pitch black room, you gulped. It felt too real... it felt like Kylo had been there, right beside you, saying those things.

And with the fast beating of your heart, you had only wished he were.

Little did you know, this would be happening for the next few nights. You finding yourself underneath Kylo, on a bed, on a couch... on the floor, on a panel... in his shuttle. No matter where it was, you were underneath him as he spoke his possessive words... yet, they weren't all too possessive when you found yourself wanting to be his the more you dreamt about it.

You were just glad they were dreams. You constantly found yourself waking up sweaty and hot, to the point you had to keep your shorts off... sometimes, even your sheets.

The dreams grew more and more graphic as the days progressed. Instead of just hearing his words, you could almost feel him. The grip on your waist, the pressure in between your hips, the bite marks against your skin... the soreness. It was becoming far too real, to the point you could hardly even look at him whenever he was near, watching you.

Little were you aware that Kylo had been doing this. Projecting his own dreams and fantasies on to you. And they were starting to get out of control.

Standing on the bridge, gazing out at the stars as you took in a deep breath, you gulped. Your mind was going elsewhere... somewhere far from the First Order and that battlecruiser you were on. It was going into a dark and obscene place.

You couldn't stop thinking about those dreams. The dreams that you could no longer tell if they were even dreams with how real they felt. Sometimes you woke up wondering if it had actually happened and you were just too worked up to even remember.

_I can just see it now... grabbing that cape and ripping it right off. Ripping her clothes to shreds, freeing her breasts from their restraints and her hips from their confines._

_I could drag my leather covered hands against her skin, giving her a spank before I tear the gloves off with my teeth, bearing my fingers into her. Delving into her flesh. Feeling her melt and ooze onto me._

_I could just taste her on my tongue, pressing her against the ground right there and then, plunging my tongue into the depths of her and tasting the galaxy's edge from within her thighs._

_I could feel her squirm against my hold, pressing her hips down as I'm nose deep into her._

_I can hear her moans of pleasure, the sound of her cries. The begging for me. The longing. The desire. The eagerness for me to fill her until she couldn't possibly feel anything at all._

_I can just sense the ecstasy that courses through her veins like my hands rushing along the sides of her body, smooth skin against my finger tips as I keep her where she's meant to be. There, with me, in places no one else could have her. In ways no one else can satisfy her. Only me._

Not realizing how lost in your mind you now were as you heard Kylo's vivid thoughts bleed into your own, as if narrating what he could so easily do to you if no one was there, you let out a faint whimper. The image appearing in front of you crystal clear.

Your bare body on the ground, head thrown back in pleasure, eyes clenched shut as your hands were deep into his hair. Tugging and pulling at it, feeling the softness slip through your fingers as he was tongue deep within you, head in between your thighs and making you see stars.

Making you see the universe through the darkness of your eyelids.

You could feel your knees pressing together at the thought of it, fantasizing and imagining it... wanting to feel it at that very moment. Wanting to feel _him_.

Biting your tongue at your sexual desires, the sound of someone stomping away suddenly caught your attention as you looked over. Kylo rushing out of the bridge, somewhere to possibly be left alone.

He was doing this and you knew it. He was making you hear his thoughts and seeing his sexual fantasies with you. And he was hearing your vulgar and impure thoughts about him.

With a racing heart and burning skin, Kylo rushed off, needing to be left alone. Needing to be away from you at that exact moment. Things were going to far, even for him, and his body couldn't possibly take it.

All the corrupted ideas he channeled within his mind and projected on to you was getting the best of him. It was making his face flush with heat and pants tighten at his hips, restricting him ever so crucially.

He felt filthy. He felt dirty. He felt crude.

You were getting the best of him. You were becoming his late night thoughts and sudden day dreams. You were the one thing he thought about in the shower and the one person he thought about when he was left alone to just his hand.

Like he was now.

His breathing was so heavy and his heart was racing so fast. The sweat was building up on his forehead and chest. The heat was becoming overbearing and so were his pants.

He needed to free himself. To relieve the dirty images from his mind. He couldn't conceal his emotions, the only moment he was missing his helmet.

He wanted you, he wanted to be with you and he wanted to be _in_ you.

Clenching your fists, you aimed down the bridge, towards the direction Kylo had gone in. You had to do something about this. You couldn't continue sleeping and waking up to having Kylo Ren fuck you good, only to realize it was all but a twisted fantasy. A fantasy that wasn't even yours but soon became it.

Seeing Kylo enter a room as the door shut behind him, you tightened your jaw and followed right after, walking right in and doing the unexpected.

Grabbing on to his arm and turning him to face you, your free hand grabbed the back of his neck and roughly pulled him down to you, lips crashing against one another that your teeth's almost collided.

You couldn't take it anymore. You couldn't handle the unresolved conflict between the two of you. The heavy tension that was wearing you down.

You needed him and you needed him now. And he wasn't going to waste your time.

You kiss him so roughly, to the point your breathing against him. Kylo tries to catch up with your pace but he's so lost in the kiss that he can't find himself to concentrate.

It's disastrous, it's messy and it's all over the place. You couldn't even tell if you were still kissing his lips or just his bottom one and chin.

Your hands were all over his body, shoving his cape off of him, removing his belt with a loud _clank!_ due to his lightsaber's hilt.

Kylo could feel your eagerness radiate off of you. You were desperate. You were needy. And he was the only one who could satisfy your urge.

"You're a filthy man, Supreme Leader." You breathed against him, lips still aching to taste more and more of him. "You make me think... such obscene thoughts about you. You make me desire such naughty things. You make me want to press your face within my thighs."

"Do you understand what you're doing to me?" You questioned, panting. "You're making me into something I've never been before. You're making me into an animal, Kylo Ren."

Kissing you back just as sloppily, Kylo held tightly onto your waist, tugging your cape off and ripping your one piece open, you removing your hands from him to let the sleeves slip right off of you as the top half hung at your hips. "I couldn't help myself." He spoke. "I want you terribly."

Kylo was stunned at first, you making the first move catching him off guard, but he was quick to act. If you were initiating it, he was going to go along with it, as far as he possibly could.

He was desperate and he had been wanting this for so long. And now that he had nothing holding him back, he was going to do exactly that.

No one can stop him now. No one can rip you away from him and threaten his life and your own. No one can get in his way. Not anymore.

Grabbing onto your bare hips, wet lips moving down your neck and leaving a sloppy mess in its wake, he couldn't help but bite at the sensitive skin. Tear at it and leave bruises so you could remember just how much he wanted _you_.

He was going to mark every inch of your body with his lips, leave black and blues on your flesh. You were now his and he was going to leave his imprint behind. And you were absolutely enjoying it with the moans slipping from your parted lips as you tugged at his smooth hair.

"I'm going to destroy this little, pretty body of yours." He spoke against your chest, grabbing at your bra and tearing it right off, freeing your breasts and encasing them in his hands, hands that eagerly worked all over your body, not getting enough. "I'm going to make you remember this for so long, that when you dream of me... when you think of me, you can almost _feel_ me."

Panting and moaning, making small noises as you whimpered from his touch, Kylo grinned. "That's right, moan for me." He hadn't even done much and you were already tearing at the seams.

"I'm going to fuck you to the point you're going to think you're up in the stars." He admitted, and without hesitation, he went straight for it.

He didn't wait, he ripped your clothes right off as he did to his own. He was too eager, to the point he couldn't even get his boots off.

But, he didn't care. He now had you pressed against a table as he pounded into you, skin meeting skin as breathing echoed in the room.

He wanted to say things, to speak his dirty thoughts, but the sounds leaving his throat were enough as it was.

It was animalistic. It sounded so rough and aggravated. With every buck of his hips, he let out a disgruntled sound, filling your ears as he filled you.

This wasn't going to last long, not with the built up tension. He could feel himself reaching his high. He was going to come and he wasn't even going to stop there.

And you? The heat in your lower abdomen was too much to bear. Your inner thighs were aching, you were tightening against him and you let out a string of moans and whimpers as you clutched tightly onto the table, eyes shut as you took in heavy breaths.

This was far better than your imagination.

Far better than Kylo's fantasies.

The sensation in between your hips, the  undying feeling of him hitting the right spot that had you seeing stars made you want to fall limp.

It was overwhelmingly _perfect_.

Bending over you, broad and bare chest pressing against your back, Kylo's lips brushed against your ear as he tugged at your hair. "You're mine." Hearing you whine, Kylo panted, "And I'm all yours."

"I'm yours... and you're mine." You spoke as you came, Kylo following shortly after as he fell limp against you.

Removing himself from you, he turned you to face him, hands gently resting against your cheeks as he kissed you ever so passionately. "I need you... by my side." He began. "To keep me sane and in place..."

Nodding your head, your hands reached up to the back of his neck. "Okay."

Leaving one last gentle kiss against your lips, his hand reached into your hair as he burried the side of his face against your own, focused on either of your breathing. He knew his journey ahead was going to be a long and cruel one. One that will bring him plenty of troubles... but, with you by his side, he knew he could get through _anything_.

"You don't know how long I've wanted this." Kylo admitted, eyes shut as he held you close to him. "I adore you, my dear Y/N." Turning his head to kiss your neck, softly, you took in a shaky breath at how gentle he had become. "I want to give you my all... if you give me your heart."

Blushing, you nodded, arms wrapping around him and bringing him even closer to you, enough for your bare bodies to touch but in a manner that was comforting. "It's all yours."


	7. Letters From The Past

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request: after meeting The Resistance members Rey realizes she's seen you before. She remembers seeing Kylo's future and she saw you clear as day in it.

The atmosphere around you felt so still. The sounds of distant terror had become mute, the frantic Resistance soldiers surrounding you were silenced. All you could hear was your heart. All you could feel was heartbreak. All you could see was the man you had longed for.

The sight of him made your heart race, the feeling coursing through your body and veins making it feel as if it all had been too good to be true. This couldn't have been real. After so long... he was in walking distance from you. But, could he see you? Could he sense you? You were sure he was too focused on the man in front of him.

His old Master.

His uncle and blood.

Luke Skywalker.

Swallowing, the world around you felt awfully slow. Leia stood beside you as she kept her eyes locked ahead as the rest of the remaining Resistance soldiers had. You wanted to look away, to turn your back to the event unraveling right in front of your eyes. To walk far from that spot and never look back.

But, you could't. You couldn't when your heart ached for this. When your mind begged to see his face once again.

One more time, that's all you wanted. No matter if he couldn't see you. No matter if he no longer felt for you.

You had to see the face of the man that tore himself from you years ago when you thought you had it all.

You had to see Ben Solo.

Not realizing everyone around you had left your surroundings, including Leia, you heard her speak up. "Don't look at me, follow him." She said to the remaining Resistance members, you looking over and seeing them walk off.

Turning your attention ahead for one last moment, you gulped before softly speaking, "Ben..."

Now finding yourself rushing along with the small group surrounding you, boarding the Millennium Falcon, you took a seat in the corner, not bothering to join in the victory that was surviving and escaping. How could you when you saw him? How could you when a piece of you... a big one, wanted to run to him and hold him close and never let go.

Looking down at your hands, you took in a deep breath before reaching into the pocket of your jacket, pulling out an old, small piece of parchment paper. Unfolding it and feeling your hands shake, you bit on your bottom lip as you read the letter.

The last letter you had ever received.

_My dear Y/N,_

_I send this out as the last letter I'll ever write for you, from here. I wish it didn't have to be this way, that I'd have to write this out on a piece of paper and not say it to you, face to face._

_I miss you dearly. You are all that matters to me now. Forever and always. But I fear my journey has reached it's end. I have found my true placement._

_I know you'll never forgive me for this, leaving you behind as if you were nothing to me, but remember this: you are my everything. You are the only thing I will hold close and dear to my heart. You are the reason why I fight to see another day, in hopes to see your face again._

_By the time you receive this letter, I'm sure you will have been advised as to what has happened._

_I'm sorry, but this is the path I'm meant to be on, and I hope one day you will come to forgive me._

_Forever yours,_ **_Ben_ ** _._

Sucking in your lips as you shut your eyes, feeling them burn with the tears that had formed, your head hung low. It had been six years since you had received that letter. Six years since you've kept it close to your heart, in hopes he'd come back to you.

Six years of you waiting.

Sitting beside Leia, Rey's eyes lowered as she felt an uneasiness in her chest. Sadness... pain. Lifting her eyes, they trailed over to the source. The woman in the corner. The one who had been holding onto something and looked down at it with watery eyes before placing it into a pocket.

You.

Eyeing Rey's expression, the furrow in her eyebrows, Leia followed the direction her focus now was in. She was lookin at you... and Leia could feel the same exact thing as Rey. "I know her... I've seen her..." Rey lowly spoke, Leia's head turning back to Rey. "In my vision..."

"What vision?" Leia curiously asked.

"I saw Ben's future... as clear as I'm seeing her and as clear as I'm seeing you." Rey said as she looked back at the general. "She was in it. She was in tears... happy... holding him as if she were afraid he'd evaporate. And he... he was happy. Happiest he could ever be."

"That's Y/N... one of the brightest and most strongest Resistance fighters." Leia began. "She was Ben's secret lover..."

"Secret?" Rey questioned, eyebrows narrowing.

"Ben was training more than he possibly could see her... they loved each other in secret. They did it in a way so no one knew..."

"But how do you?" Rey asked, Leia's eyes connecting with her own.

"She told me. She said Ben was afraid, that if anyone were to find out, they'd use her against him. Hurt her. Kill her." Leia said. "So they kept it hidden. They wrote letters to each other... secretly met up whenever he came to visit me..."

"They were torn from each other..." Rey spoke. "She has hope... she hasn't given up."

"No..." Leia shook her head. "She hasn't. It's been six years... and she believes he will come back. Like he said in the letter she keeps in her pocket. She never lets it go. She keeps it close to her heart."

"He needs to see her. She may be the only hope we have..." Rey spoke.

"Han couldn't do it... You couldn't do it, Luke couldn't do it..." Leia began. "I could never do it. I knew he felt me. Out when we were at war before I was blown out of the ship. I felt him... and he felt me. But he resisted."

"But what about her? She could be of help. Maybe she's the one?"

"We couldn't do that to her... that's too painful-"

"He's the Supreme Leader." Rey interrupted, almost in a pleading tone. "He wouldn't let anyone harm her if she were to go to him."

"No, I can't send her out there. Not when anyone can kill her, Rey. I can't... I can't keep losing. I nearly lost _you_."

"But I'm still here. She's here. She loves him... she still loves him. And I know he still loves her. I felt it. I saw it. Leia, please... she is our only hope of saving him." Rey begged but Leia couldn't look at her, it was too painful. The thought of sending you out there, defenseless, alone... you hardly ever manned a blaster. How were you supposed to enter a First Order battlecruiser?

"I... Ive lost so many people in one day... I've lost so many people in my lifetime. And I know this is war and it happens..."

"Leia... we could bring him back. We could have Ben back with us... with her. She will no longer suffer." Rey said. "I saw them. In his future. They were so happy... so in love. They held on so dearly to each other. He was so at ease... free. Leia, we have to do something."

"No." She shook her head. "I'm not putting her life at risk, I'm sorry." Leia stood. "We've lost him..." Looking up at Leia and seeing the pain in her eyes, knowing very well she didn't mean what she had said, Rey watched her leave her sight before looking back over at you.

Keeping your head low as you held your chest pocket, you took in a deep breath. _I hope you're okay, out there... I hope you're safe... I hope you soon realize what path you're truly meant to be on... where you're meant to be... With me._

Hearing your thoughts as you had left your mind open, Rey swallowed before she approached you, sitting beside you. "I don't mean to bother you, but, if you don't mind... I'd like to talk to you."

Turning your head and seeing Rey, you swallowed. You knew she had seen him... you wanted to ask her so many questions, but you held back. "You're not a bother..." You shook your head, dropping your eyes from hers.

Rey couldn't help but frown. You were hurting. "I know something you don't... I know something you do." She started, taking in a deep breath. "You love Ben Solo-" Seeing your head shoot up, she continued, "And he still loves you."

Blinking as your tears resurfaced, you listened. "I saw into his future... it was crystal clear. It was real... and you were in it." She began as you swallowed. "You were with him, holding him close... happy... crying. Thankful for his return." Rey said. "You never gave up on hope. You never gave up on him... no matter how long it took... you believed."

Looking away, you bit your inner lip, heart sinking at the thought of Ben's return. "Ben..." You softly spoke.

"We can still save him. _You_ can save him." Rey said, laying a gentle hand on your shoulder. "You can bring him home."

"How?" You asked, looking at her. "I-I don't know how to defend myself, I hardly do... I never leave the Leia's side... it's a rarity I use a blaster. I'm not Force sensitive and I-"

"You don't need to be skillful in combat to save someone. You don't have to be somebody to do good. Everyone starts small... everyone starts somewhere. I know this." Rey nodded. "I was no one and now I am someone. Same for Finn... same for Luke..." Rey said. "You are someone to Leia... to Ben. To us all. To the Resistance. To the light in the galaxy."

"You can save him. You can do what no one else was able to do because Ben's heart belongs to you. He has it locked away and only saved for you. Because you are the only person who ever truly understood him... stood by his side... respected him. You loved him. And you still do."

Blinking away your tears, you sucked in a breath. "You can save him, Y/N. You can bring him home... into your arms." She softly smiled. "And you won't do it alone... You have me."

"H-how? How can I possibly save him when he's-"

"He's no longer an apprentice... he's the Supreme Leader." Nearly gasping, your eyes widened. "If he feels you in the Force, senses your presence... he will go to you and make sure no one harms you."

"But... what if he wants me to join him?"

"Then you have to convince him what's right. Show him where he's truly meant to be." Rey nodded. "And I think you know where."

━━━━━━

Standing on the bridge of one of the remaining battlecruisers, Kylo crossed his arms behind himself, hands held together as he looked out at the stars. The remaining of the Resistance was able to escape, but that didn't mean he'd lose them forever. He'd find them once again, he'd finish what Snoke couldn't. He'll be a far better Supreme Leader.

But his thoughts went elsewhere. They were no longer with the war... no longer with the Order... no longer on that spot he was standing in, staring out at the stars.

No, they were on the Force.

 _Ben_.

Turning his head the slightest as his eyes searched the scattered stars, he took in a deep breath. It hit too close to his heart. It was too familiar... he could feel the closeness.

When the scavenger... when Rey had called him by his name, it struck something within him. Just like how it had when his father had called him. But it didn't strike him like that faint voice he was now hearing in his head... the soft voice that bounced through the Force.

 _Ben_.

Sucking in a breath, he looked down from the stars and at the ground, that tug in his chest... that skip in his heartbeat. His fantasies were getting the best of him. His imagination was starting to overrule him.

_Come home..._

Feeling his lips part as his eyes trailed the black ground beneath him, Kylo's breathing grew fast. It felt too close... too strong.

"Supreme Leader." Hearing Hux's voice speak from behind, Kylo turned his head, enough to see the general through his peripheral vision. "We have a prisoner on bored... They claimed to have... turned themselves in."

Staying silent as Kylo lightly swallowed, he nodded. Something didn't feel right... something was off. Who in their right mind would turn themselves in to the First Order?

"Take me to them." He said as he turned, cape billowing behind him as he walked off the bridge, a pair of stormtroopers guiding him along the way.

The closer he got to the room, the louder the ringing in his hears had become. The stronger his breathing was... the faster his heart was racing. Something was waiting for him... he could sense it in the Force.

"Here, sir." One of the troopers spoke as Kylo lifted a hand, dismissing them.

Standing there and eyeing the door, taking in a deep breath, Kylo's hand reached out the slightest as the door opened. Watching the metal slide to allow him in, Kylo took a step forward, only to stop at the sight before him.

Hearing the bang of the door shutting, you slowly lifted your head from looking down, bound to a chair like a prisoner.

Feeling his heart skip a beat at the sight of you, Kylo's eyes grew in size as he instantly opened and closed his palms, the restrains holding you down instantly opening as you nearly fell forward, Kylo flinching... as if you were going to collapse, so he could catch you.

Standing straight and trailing your eyes from his boots, up to his face, your breath hitched. He was there, right in front of you. Alive, breathing... _different_.

Blinking as you felt your eyes water up, you swallowed. He looked so different up close... so much older than the last time you had seen him. Dark circles, prominent eye bags... the deep scar. If you were anyone else who knew him from his past, you'd hardly recognize him... but then you looked into his eyes, deeply, and you could see the hint of light in them. The eyes you missed looking into... the eyes that held so many emotions that fell dark.

Slowly reaching your hand out, the tips of your fingers brushed against his chest before pressing your palm on to where his heart was beating... racing. Shutting your eyes for a moment, lips parting as you took in a deep breath, you couldn't help but feel a tear slip. He was real and right in front of you, against your palm.

He didn't swat your hand, he didn't push you away... he didn't reach through the Force to harm you. No, he stared down at you. He eyed your hair, your attire, the Resistance badge on your shoulder... your face. It struck something within him. It had been so long and here you were, alive, in front of him and not showing an ounce of hate towards him.

"Ben..." You softly spoke, your hand just about ready to fall, but his now gloveless hand held tightly onto it, keeping it in place as your eyes then opened. Head lifted and tears dripping down your cheeks as Kylo looked you in the eye, he fell to one knee before you, hand still clutching your own.

Reaching into your jacket's pocket with your free hand, you pulled out the letter and placed it right in front of his line of vision. You knew, he'd know what it was.

And he did. The second his eyes landed on it, he felt his throat lock. The letter. The last one.

"I never lost hope... I never gave up on you." You stated. "I waited... for as long as it took. Because I loved you..." Hearing your voice, Kylo's eyes trailed up to you. "Because I still love you..."

Looking up at you, as if not believing your words, Kylo held tightly onto the letter as your hand slid to lie on his cheek. "You were meant for more... I know. You were meant to be better... to be stronger... to be the greatest. But you were never meant for any of this. Not a Jedi Master... not a Supreme Leader... you were meant to live for what you truly wanted. And that isn't being part of this battle." You shook your head. "Neither of us were meant for this."

Taking in slow, deep breaths, Kylo couldn't look away. "It's too late... I've killed my demons... I've fallen too deeply."

"No... you haven't." You said. "If you had, you wouldn't be here, with me, in this moment. You were meant for so much more, Ben. A life away from it all. A life free from the darkness and light. Somewhere where you truly belong." Swallowing, your voice softened. "Beside me."

Feeling tears slip, Kylo eyed your face. Every little feature it had to offer... every feature that brought him peace of mind. Something he hadn't felt in so long. "It's time to come home... It's not the same without you. It never was." Moving on to your knees, your hand gently moved onto his scar, fingertips brushing against it. "Just you and I... away from it all."

"Where would we go?"

"Anywhere..." You breathed before closing the gap between the two of you, kissing his lips and nearly melting into it. It had been so long... so very long. You could hardly remember how it felt, it almost felt brand new. It felt like the world around you was nonexistent. As if he weren't a prisoner to his own demons. As if you weren't a prisoner to your broken heart.

It felt like freedom and peace and happiness altogether. It felt like hope, faith and trust. A never ending bond. A strong link that could never be broken.

An opening to your future.

What you felt in that very moment was felt through Kylo. Through is veins, against his chest... in his heart. He still felt something. He still felt love. It was there, it was deep, and it was becoming strong again.

"Please..." You begged against his lips. "Us against the odds. Us against the world..."

Feeling you press your forehead against his, Kylo shut his eyes.

This was his chance... this was his way out. His way of escape... but, would he take it?

"Okay." He nodded, you letting out a sigh in relief as you kissed his injured cheek before standing with him.

Putting on false restraints, Kylo got a hold of your arm and walked out with you, aiming for the hangar.

"It was a setup." Hux gritted his teeth as he stood beside of pair of stormtroopers who had overheard you speaking to Rey through a com link. "It was a setup! Someone find them!" He shouted, looking into the empty torture chamber. He knew Kylo didn't have what it took to be a Supreme Leader. "FIND THEM!"

Hearing stormtroopers marching, Kylo quickened his pace, approaching an unmarked shuttle that had been a spare, dropping your restraints and tossing them to a side. "You will pilot us out of here." Kylo said to the pilot that had been checking on the panel.

"I will pilot you out of here."

Letting you go and hitting the ramp button to close it, Kylo's eyes landed on a furious Hux. "Shoot it down! SHOOT IT! KILL THEM!" He shouted in pure anger, face burning red as he clenched his jaw.

Feeling your breath hitch as a trooper had aimed right at you, the blaster shot hovered inches away from you as your heart dropped, Kylo's hand outstretched, preventing it. "No one will take you away from me." Seeing the ramp close in time, the shuttle was off.

Dropping his arm, Kylo turned to look at you as you had done the same to him, not holding back and pulling him into your arms, letting out what you had been holding in, crying into his shoulder as he held tightly onto you.

Your heart felt so light, it felt too good to be true... it was too easy. How were you the one who was able to save him?

"I never stopped loving you, Y/N." He admitted. " _Never_."

"I love you, Ben." You breathed, whimpering. "So much... please, never leave me again."

Tightening his hold around you, he buried his face into your neck. "I couldn't."

"Where to?" The pilot asked.

"Where is she going..." Rey asked, eyeing your tracker. "She is supposed to return..." Looking up at Chewie, he let out a small roar. "She's... she's leaving. And she's taking him with her..." Watching your tracker blink, growing further and further away from the new Resistance base and the battlecruiser, she swallowed. "They're running away..."


	8. Visions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request: With everything that happened with Rey, I can't help but to imagine how would it be if Reader was the one in her place. Not as in being badass like Rey, just literally waking up and screaming because you were seeing Ben shirtless at the end of your bed or simply ranting to him about how Poe was getting on reader's nerves as he silently listens to give a shitty opinion after and even though it was weird to you, Kylo acted as if it was the most normal things ever.

For once, it had been a peaceful night for you. Usually, your nights were uneasy and your sleeping schedule was terrible. Working alongside the Resistance, trying to bring balance back to the Force, protecting the light... it was draining and it took a toll on you. Even if you fought hard enough to keep going.

But now, now you were at ease, not tossing and turning. Not waking up every ten minutes. Not staying wide awake, staring into darkness.

No, you were asleep. No dreams, but you were completely out.

That is until you woke up to an uneasy feeling pressing against your chest, burying against you. As if someone was nearby... close enough for you to sense them out. To feel their presence.

Opening your eyes and taking in a deep breath as you sat up, you rubbed your face and let out a yawn. You were hoping it was around the time you had to wake up and not the middle of the night. Knowing you, you wouldn't go back to sleep.

"Ugh..." You grunted, lowering your hands, only to look up and gasp. "What the hell?!" You shrieked, jumping in your spot and covering your eyes. "W-why are you here?! How are you here?! Why are you shirtless?!" You exclaimed, peeking through the slits of your fingers, only to hiccup.

"I could ask you the same exact thing." Kylo said, looking over at you, sitting in front of him. "Why are you in my chambers?"

"Why are you in _mine_?" You glared, standing up from your spot. "How did you even get in here?"

"How did _you_ get in _here_?" He repeated, taking a step closer as you took a step back. "I was just finishing my shower, getting dressed... and then you appeared out of nowhere."

"I appeared? No... _you_ appeared out of nowhere. Why are you here? How are you in front of me?" You asked, crossing your arms. You didn't want to seem the least bit of flustered, not with a shirtless Kylo Ren in front of you. Something you hadn't seen in a very long time... and the last time you saw it, he wasn't even half the size of him now. He was... thin and lanky.

"I'd like to know the same thing." Eyeing you, he took in a small breath as you kept your eyes on him—nowhere else. You couldn't dare look down at his broad chest or his hard muscles on his stomach... and you definitely couldn't look at the towel wrapped lowly to his hips. "You've changed."

"Of course I have. It's been years, _Ben_." You calmly spoke, too focused on your breathing and heartbeat to even stress over his so called revelation. You couldn't get worked up over sheer stupidity in the obvious when he was nearly naked _right_ in front of you. "You're no longer scrawny."

"You're no longer weak." He pointed out as you glared. You knew he was responding in such way because you were attacking his ego. "You're not afraid to back talk."

"Should I be?" You asked.

"The rest of the Resistance is." He responded, you swallowing. You didn't want to seem afraid, not in front of him... were you afraid?

"That doesn't give me a reason to. I know who you are. I know your capabilities. I'm sure if you wanted, you'd try to kill me know... but you haven't tried."

"I don't see the need to, y/n." Hearing him speak your name, you felt shivers. "The only wrong you've done to me is join the enemy."

" _You_ joined the enemy." You corrected. "I did what was right."

"So it may seem." He softly spoke, eyeing you from head to toe.

"I don't understand as to why we can see each other." You said, eyes looking down for a moment, only to shift away. "What's the point? Why did you come to me?"

"I didn't." He calmly answered, you turning your focus back to him, eyebrows narrowing. "It's the Force."

"Why would the Force bring us together?" You shook your head.

"Maybe because you're the only one who's worthy to speak to." Glaring at him as your eyes narrowed, he smirked, causing you to sigh. "I wish I knew why."

"Well, I don't have time for this-"

"You just woke up." Kylo crossed his arms, making his muscles more prominent as you sucked in a breath.

"Yes, well, I have things to do and you have clothes to put on." You pointed, looking back up at him as you tried hiding the fact that you were... enjoying the sight.

"Why?" Kylo asked. "You enjoy it, don't you?" Feeling your eyes widen as you wanted to scream, you suddenly heard a knock on your door, catching your attention as you looked away.

"No, I do n-" Looking back ahead, Kylo was no longer there. "Bantha fodder..."

"Y/n, get up!" Poe shouted as he banged on your door. "We've got things to take care of and you are late!" Groaning, you rubbed your face, shoulders dropping. You hated to admit it, but you were the slightest of disappointed that Kylo was no longer there... In all honesty, his presence wasn't even that bad. It was tolerable. It almost felt like how your... friendship was before.

"Alright, alright!" You swatted your hands in the air, hearing him walk away as you turned to get ready for the day ahead of you. Something you weren't looking forward to.

You were exhausted... tired... completely drained. You wanted the war to end. For the lives to stop being taken away. For the galaxy to be okay for once in forever...

But, not even peace of mind was achievable with your position.

"I'm tired..." You breathed. "I'm so tired. I'm exhausted... My body aches, it's killing me. I can hardly sleep anymore, it's all a mess. Everything feels like it's falling apart and I am trying so hard to remind myself that it's not. That I'll be okay... that I'll get through this. Like I am now." You said, leaning against the table in the small, unoccupied panel room you were in. "I should blame you for this."

"But you don't." Kylo said, sitting across from you, fully dressed and with his cape on.

"No." You breathed, rubbing your forehead. "I don't. Cause it isn't entirely your felt... even if you're a Supreme Leader now."

"I want to end this war as much as you do, y/n." He said. "But, of course, your men keep getting in my damn way."

Rolling your eyes, you stood straight. "My men? What about your men?"

"At least my men don't boss me around any longer." He quipped as your facial expression dropped, thoughts reverberating back to Poe and the way he was taking command earlier.

"You're talking about Dameron, huh? How do you know about that?" With a skeptical look, Kylo shrugged, leaning back in his seat. On his _throne_.

"I don't."

"Liar." You huffed. "But, you're right. He knows how to get on every single one of my nerves. He acts like he's the head of the Resistance. As if everyone has to listens to him. He was demoted, you know?"

"That's because he's an imbecile. Poe Dameron believes he's the finest pilot in the galaxy. I beg to differ." Kylo held his head high as you looked at him, eyebrows scrunched up as you blinked. He was full of himself... but, at least he was listening. Which was odd.

"He is the Resistance's most finest, Ben. Maybe not the galaxy's... According to you." You said, crossing your arms as Kylo's head turned from looking elsewhere, eyebrows narrowing as if you had said something offensive. "Oh, save it."

"Then tell me, dear y/n. Who is the finest pilot in the entire galaxy?" He asked, your eyes shifting away, not willingly looking into his own. " _Enlighten_ me."

Shifting your jaw as you knew you should've seen this coming, you then bit your tongue. "I'm waiting..."

Moving your eyes back to meet his, you cleared your throat. "I wouldn't know-"

"Bullshit."

" _Hey_." You snapped. "I'm telling the truth."

"You know you never could lie to me. No matter how hard you tried. It always slipped through the cracks. You're lucky none of my men have ever captured you." He spoke, hands and arms resting on the throne.

"And if they had, would you have tortured me?" You asked in pure curiosity.

"No." He plainly answered, catching you by surprise. "You try to find anything to make me out as the bad guy... but it's not working out for you, is it?" Staying quiet, you unfolded your arms, resting your palms on the table behind you. "Of course not. I'm not the bad guy in your story, y/n. Maybe that's why we're here in this exact moment."

"You honestly think the Force is trying to bring _us_ together?" You asked, sarcasm dripping from your words like venom. "It doesn't make a lick of sense. There is nothing between us."

"Exactly. No hatred... no respect... nothing. Absolutely nothing." Kylo said, leaning forward. "Riddle me that."

"I wish I could help solve it, but neither I can decode it." You said, only to take in a deep breath. "How are you so unfazed by this?"

"Why should I be? Although I am curious as to how it happened... You are not a bother." He spoke truthfully as you stood silently, sucking in a small breath as you swallowed. "If anything, I enjoy this. It's been too long."

"Yeah..." You lowly responded, eyes trailing down. "Is that why you're letting this happen?"

"You're letting it happen, as well. You could so easily ignore me." Kylo pointed out as you stood there, quiet.

"I don't... want to." You admitted, almost ashamed as you looked down. "There's something inside me... that hasn't let go. Even after all this time."

Looking at you, Kylo stood up, walking towards you. "I feel it, too."

Looking up, your heart skipped a beat. "I tried to convince myself... that it's nothing to worry about. That it's just my mind taunting me. But... I guess not..." You breathed, Kylo coming to a stop in front of you.

"You've always been there. On the back of my mind. I've felt you." Kylo admitted. "And you've felt me, too." Looking him in the eye, you swallowed. "That's why we're here... in this moment."

"How?" You softly asked, looking up at him as you stood straight. "How is it that this is happening if it's been so long?"

"Maybe it was time." He said. "You've been so... tired, distant... Aching. You can't take the pain anymore. The toll it's taking on you... you needed a sign. A sign on what to do." Staring at him as he spoke, your heart ached in your chest. "And this was it."

"But... what is it trying to tell me?" You asked, Kylo moving closer, the gap between the two of you becoming smaller as your heart raced.

"That, it's time for you to leave." Kylo spoke. "You were meant for more. For better. You are worth so much more than you believe. You are tearing yourself apart trying to prove yourself... when you don't have to. Not when you already mean so much."

"I-I don't... I always overwork myself, trying to become better. To _be_ better. But it's never enough. It never _is_ enough."

"It is." He said. "It is to me."

Looking him in the eye, searching them, you blinked. "Don't try to pull that."

"Pull what?"

"Use me. Manipulate me. It's not going to work."

"Why would I need to manipulate you when I have everything I've wanted?" Kylo tilted his head. "I'm the Supreme Leader now. Luke Skywalker is gone. I have all that I need. Do you?"

Looking at him, as if searching for an answer, you swallowed. "No..." You nearly whispered. "I deserve better... I am slowly killing myself with the lack of sleep. Not eating as much. Overworking myself. Out doing myself. I need... I need help."

"You need _freedom_." Kylo corrected. "I can give you that, and so much more."

"How?" You nearly cried.

Reaching a hand out, Kylo looked you in the eye. "I am the only one who truly knows your worth." Looking down at his hand, your chest tightened. "Join me, and together, we can rule the galaxy."


	9. Long Live The Supreme

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request: Yay, I'm so excited to see your new work! An idea for a request containing TLJ spoilers: reader can't help feeling a bit jealous and insecure, because of Kylo's force bond with Rey. You can take it however you want! You're amazing and I love everything you do!

There was a distance growing in between you and Kylo. It was suffocating and it was deep. Ever since the fall of Starkiller, he hadn't been the same. There was something off... something you couldn't pinpoint. Yet, he stayed with you.

A part of you feared it was because of you, that he was no longer feeling the same things he once felt before, towards you. That he was losing interest. That you weren't good enough.

Why would Kylo Ren, a Force user, want to be with someone like you? Someone mediocre... someone just like everyone else. A nobody.

It was slowly tearing you apart, your mind was getting the best of you and fear was at hand. You had long nights where you couldn't sleep, back facing him as you lied silently, crying. How had he not sensed your distress?

Then... you found the source to your problems. You had overheard Kylo talking to someone... someone in your living quarters, and your fear skyrocketed.

You were afraid, upset, disappointed... deceived, jealous... insecure, all at once. Had he been cheating on you? Was he falling out of love? It was breaking your heart and you had to distance yourself, you had to save yourself from the pain you knew you'd soon feel.

But, how could you when you loved him? You knew you loved him, you felt it, it was there and it was stronger than any other emotion you felt for him. And it hurt knowing... he didn't want you anymore.

Standing from afar, watching Kylo sitting there, talking, your heart snapped when you recognized the figure. The scavenger.

Covering your mouth and trying not to gasp, your eyes burned with tears as your knees buckled. How was she there? Why was she there? Why were they reaching hands?

Unable to hold back any sounds, a whimper escaped your lips, loud enough to catch either of their attention.

Seeing their heads snap in your direction, you quickly turn and ran. You ran as fast as you could and you didn't stop running. Not for anyone.

You ran down the halls, past stormtroopers and officers, nearly ramming into them, almost tripping over droids rolling by. Your heart was aching in your chest, echoing in your ears as your vision blurred with tears.

How could he do this to you? How could he lie to you?

She was nothing to him. He had told you.

He hated her, he despised her. He wanted her dead for what she had done to him...

Yet... there he was, hands touching as they spoke.

It was replaying in your head and made your chest ache. You were in pain. So much pain. You loved Kylo more than anything.. and this is how he repaid you? By cheating on you?

Whimpering and trying so hard not to collapse in the middle of the hall, you escaped, you tried getting as far away from that room as possible. You couldn't let him find you. You couldn't see him. Not when you were in this much agony.

Turning a corner and reaching a barren room, one that held some of the stormtroopers blasters in, you locked yourself there.

Crashing your back against a wall of blasters, you cried into your hands, knees shaking as your breathing hitched. You wanted to leave the ship, to never look back, to never see him again.

But the pain in your chest... it was so strong, so heavy, it was _killing_ you. Did your love mean nothing to him? Did he lie to you all this time when the two of you snuck around? Was he just using you so he could feel as if someone did care for him... in which you truly did.

You cared for him more than yourself, you had put him before yourself so many times that you've lost count. He was always more important to you... yet, here you were, just a pile of garbage.

Hearing a loud bang, you jumped in your spot. "Y/N, OPEN UP!" Kylo shouted from the other side of the door, your breathing quickening as you shook your head.

"GO AWAY!" You shouted, but he refused.

"Open the door!" He continuously banged. "Open the damn door! Let me talk to you!"

"No!" You panted, bottom lip quivering as you trembled.

Hearing the door shake as Kylo reached into the Force, forcing it to slide open, he took a step forward, only to halt in his spot as he looked at you. You were aiming a blaster at him, shaky hand clutched as your finger was on the trigger.

Trailing his eyes from the blaster, up to your own, he could see the pain in them. The heartbreak. The sadness... the anger. You were hurting badly. "Let me explain-"

"No." You spoke through gritted teeth. "Am I nothing to you? Was I just someone on the side to make you feel good? So you weren't lonely? WAS I JUST A TEMPORARY FIX!" You exclaimed, nudging the blaster as Kylo kept his eyes locked on to your own.

"No." He simply answered as you glared.

"You LIAR!" You stomped, teeth chattering as the tears continued to slip. "You know I loved you! You know how much I love you! Was my love not good enough? Am I not good enough?" Your voice cracked, Kylo feeling his chest tighten. "I'm not... Because I'm not a Force user, I'm not a combat expert, I don't know how to pilot... I don't even know how to use a blaster properly." You cried. "You don't love me... it was all a lie."

"Don't do this, y/n." Kylo said. "You know none of that is true. You know I don't give a damn about titles or skills. I don't care if you can kick my ass or not. That's not what matters to me. It will never matter-"

"Then why her?!" You shouted again. "Then why distance yourself from me?! Why neglect me..." You whispered as Kylo's jaw tightened, hating the sight of you like this. "I-I don't understand!"

"I'm using her." He simply stated as your heart dropped. "I need her to trust me... I need her to believe that I want what's best for her. She's naïve, she's oblivious. If I get her trust, she will come here... she will meet with Snoke... she will either join or be defeated." Kylo said. "She is the last of the light, Luke is deteriorating and if I convince her to come... I can end the Jedi."

Staring at him with burning eyes as you blinked, Kylo took a step forward. "She means nothing to me, y/n. She is a pawn in all of this... You, you are everything and more." Not realizing how close he had gotten, Kylo grabbed onto the blaster and lowered it from your hold. "I never meant to neglect you, to make you feel unloved... but I promise you, with what I have planned... we no longer have to hide."

Staring up at him with tear stained cheeks, Kylo placed the blaster back before his hands pressed against your cheeks, gloved fingers wiping away your tears. "I promise you... I will give you my all."

"What will you do?"

                                                    ━━━━━━

Frantically pacing, eagerly waiting as it had been hours since you last had seen Kylo, you felt your stomach turn. You hated not knowing what was going to happen. Being out of the loop. All you knew was that there was war. War and destruction.

Unable to wait any longer, you rushed out of the room and towards the throne room, where you knew Kylo would be.

Picking up your pace and entering the elevator, you eagerly tapped your foot before the door opened to a complete disaster in front of you. Sparks flying, bodies lying everywhere... Snoke's body in half as a part of him lied on the ground while the rest fell off the throne.

Gulping, heart race picking up, your eyes landed on a pile of black. "Kylo?" You breathed, rushing over. What happened? Where was the Scavenger? And why was there so much death?

"Kylo?" Falling to your knees and holding onto him, Kylo groaned as he opened his eyes, sitting him. "What... what happened? Who-"

"It's done." He said, looking you in the eye. "He's no longer anchoring me down. He no longer controls me... He is no longer in my way."

"What about the scavenger?" You asked, eyeing him.

"She escaped. But that does not matter. What matters is that we finish what Snoke could never." Kylo spoke, standing up with you. "He's dead. I killed him and you will be the only one to know that. Everyone else will believe it was the scavenger." Slowly nodding your head, you swallowed. "No one can get in our way." He said, looking you in the eye.

"He's gone..." You lowly spoke.

"We have a new ruling. General Hux won't be pleased." Kylo said, a faint grin on his lips as you couldn't help but smile, knowing where this was going.

"Long live the Supreme Leader."


	10. The Supreme and His Queen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request: With Snoke's death, General Hux adamantly urges the new Supreme Leader find a wife so that they may bring a heir to Kylo's reign (one that will be raised properly by decent parents, that Ben Solo sorely lacked, and not juat trained) and for further political alliances. Insert monarch reader, ruling alone, and taking no shit when this Emo Barbie and his ginger puppy kick her metaphorical door down and demands PROPER courtship, or no deal

Sitting silently on his throne, knuckles pressed against his chin as his free hand drummed his fingers against the arm rest, Kylo took in a small breath. It felt as if any and all things the general—Hux—had to say to him was absolutely useless. Now with the title he had Kylo could easily tell Hux to, in simple terms, _shut up_.

He knew very well that Hux was still bitter about the change, his words "long love the Supreme Leader" still haunting Kylo. Hux's loyalty to Snoke was strong, so he knew very well that Hux questioned the supposed fact that the scavenger, Rey, was the one who had killed the previous supreme and praetorian guards.

But, Hux knew very well there was no chance of him going up against a Force user, especially one who could snap him like a twig and very much hated him, so he tried not being on Kylo's bad side for the sake of... well, himself.

"Supreme Leader, amongst all of this... you need to find a wife."

"Excuse me?" Kylo nearly snapped, eyes trailing from staring effortlessly at nothing, over to the ginger.

"Let me rephrase that-" Clearing his throat, Hux continued, "you need a wife who will birth your heir should the time come that you are killed or die."

Narrowing his eyes, Kylo huffed. "No one is worthy of being my empress, general. None of you soldiers or officers. Who might you suggest I marry?" He seethed, as if what Hux had said was the most foul and absurd thing to come out of his mouth. Amongst many other things.

"A queen. A ruler. Someone worthy, obviously. Not my men." Hux shook his head. "We need more allies, the Resistance are gaining more and more. If we get you to marry a queen and make them our ally... the possibilities will be endless on who would support us. More political alliances." Hux stated as Kylo pondered over the thought. He couldn't help but admit it was a wise idea... Kylo did need someone else beside him to keep him in check. Now that he was the highest in command, he had no one to go to or to correct his actions.

"Who in this galaxy would be willing to marry me? Many royal families and rulers refuse to be a part of any of this. Most of them stay to their own matters or support the Resistance." Kylo reminded as he had leaned forward.

"I am well aware, but before I came here, I had my men do some... research." Hux cleated his throat. "It would be wise to find you an unmarried queen, someone far beyond worthy... a woman with strong characterization and love for her people."

"Why does that matter?" Kylo lifted an eyebrow.

"Because, then she would be a fine mother to your child. One you would have to raise as well so they won't turn out like you." Hux slipped, Kylo glaring and causing Hux to choke on his words for a moment. "F-forgive me, Supreme Leader... I meant, they won't feel neglected."

"Hmm." Kylo hummed. "Who is this _queen_ you have in mind?" He waved his hand, becoming eager and impatient.

"Queen y/n y/l/n. And her planet is not too far off from where this battlecruiser is plotted." Hux informed. "She is a wise queen... I've read up on her, or at least my men have informed me. She is strong willed, persistent... independent-"

"I would hope a queen would be independent." Kylo scoffed. "The question is, is she worthy to stand beside me and rule the galaxy with me if and when the time comes?" He lifted a brow down at Hux as Hux nodded.

"Yes. She is. And we extend our proof by meeting her."

"Meeting her..."

"Yes, immediately, Supreme Leader. We make a deal with her. Her planet stands with no one in this war. She either marries you and her people are free to live... or, she watches her people suffer."

"Hmph..." Kylo huffed. "Then I suggest we meet this queen."

━━━━━━

"My queen, we have some unexpected guests." A handmaiden said to you as you had been sat on your throne, just finishing a meeting.

"Guests?" You questioned. "We do not have any guests scheduled to meet with today unless they are from the committee?" Narrowing your eyebrows, the handmaiden gulped.

"The guards alerted me that First Orser ships have landed... it seems as if they were important men who stepped off the shuttle." She said as your eyes narrowed.

"First Order?" You asked in confusion. Your planet had no treaties with the Order or the Resistance. You made sure you took no part in the war as you were doing just fine staying right out of it. Why in the galaxy would they come to you now? "Are they on the palace's premises?"

"Yes... I came here as fast as I could. The guards couldn't stop them... one of them was a... Force user." She breathed as you let out a scoff.

"Who in their right mind-" Hearing the doors being harshly pushed open by nothing, your head snapped in the direction, seeing two figures walk in, followed by soldiers cladded in black and white armor.

"Queen y/l/n." The red head spoke as you took in a deep breath, glaring at the man who dressed in black, hair slick and a patch on their shoulder.

"Who must you be?" You nearly snapped. "I don't do well with men who think they can so easily barge into my palace without permission."

"I am general Hux of the First Order and this is-"

"Supreme Leader Kylo Ren." Kylo introduced himself, cutting Hux off as he took a step forward. "I will make this quick and save the formalities. I demand a proper courtship-"

"Excuse me?!" You gasped.

"In exchange to keeping your people safe. If you do not accept this deal the people of this planet will be considered an enemy to the First Order."

Narrowing your eyes, you stood from your throne and walked towards him. "How dare you enter _my_ planets atmosphere, storm into _my_ palace and barge into _my_ throne and demand such thing from me _AND_ threaten me and my people?" You seethed, looking him in the eye as he looked into yours. In all honesty, he was enjoying the fire within them. The sharpness of your tongue. The lack of fear you showed him. You were a true ruler. "Who do you think you are?"

"Like I said-" Lifting his chin, Kylo repeated himself, "Supreme Leader Kylo Ren."

"And you honestly think I care about such... atrocious title? Supreme Leader? What does that mean to me?" You crossed your arms.

"I am the leader of the biggest military organization in the galaxy. I could easily rule your planet with a snap of my finger." Turning your eyes to his gloved fingers snapping, your eyes shot back up to his own. "And... I am a Force user."

"So?" You shook your head. "Is that supposed to intimidate me? Am I supposed to bend the knee? If anyone should be bending their knee it should be _you_." You arched an eyebrow.

"Is that what you want? Will that shut you up?" Gasping once again as your eyes widened, Kylo fell to his knee, using the Force to force Hux onto his knee as the troopers all instantly fell to their own, not wanting Kylo to make them. "I bend the knee."

Staring in awe at how easily the man had bend the knee—and made his men do it—you swallowed. "Why are you so desperate for me to be your wife?"

"I need someone to bear my children." He blatantly stated as your eyes widened.

"Excuse me?" You nearly whispered as he stood back up.

"I am the Supreme Leader now of the First Order. I am also a Force user. I need an heir to the throne if and when I am killed or I die in action." Kylo said as your eyebrows furrowed. "And I need a woman worthy enough."

"You don't even know me, how in the galaxy do you know I'm worthy?" You glared once again. "I am fine on my own, I am ruling this planet and protecting them just fine with no man by my side. What makes you think I'd easily accept your offer?"

"You could rule the entire galaxy, at my side. Your people would be protected and I will make sure no one attacks them even if you believe they're fine now with just your ruling." Kylo answered. "You can never have enough support, even if you think you're fine on your own, _my queen_."

"And you think I'd take this offer after you threatened me?" You raised an eyebrow, hands falling onto your hips.

"I had to threaten you. What kind of ruler doesn't put fear into others in order to get what they want?" Kylo tilted his head the slightest.

Taking in a deep breath and calming your rising heart, feeling the heat leave your face, you looked Kylo in the eye. You hated how attracted you were in the man, the way he spoke so calmly and assertively... how he took your remarks so easily and fired back at you. It was... hot, especially someone who could actually be at your level. For once. None of the candidates for you when you were a princess was ever worthy enough.

And you were sure, with that look in his eyes, that he felt the same.

"Fine." You answered. "But you must take me to dinner. Treat me as your equal and let me get to know you. I will not be marrying a man I hardly know."

"How gullible of you, my queen." Kylo smirked. "You so easily take up my offer..."

"I could so easily take it back, Supreme Leader. I will not show you any ounce of fear when I do not feel it." You stood your ground as Kylo searched your eyes, a grin growing on his lips.

"Wonderful. Then I suggest we get this dinner over with." Sticking his hand out, you looked down at it before he continued to speak, "I have no time to waste."

━━━━━━

And so Kylo truly did not have time to waste. After that first dinner, in which you teasingly claimed to be a date, the two of you had hit it off a lot better than expected. Which lead to more dinners... and more dates... and, well, more than you or Kylo had expected.

"You are unbelievable, Ren." You glared, arms crossed as the two of you stood in one of the halls in the battlecruiser Kylo resided in. "This is absolutely the most foolish idea you have ever come up with!"

"Oh, as if you can come up with a far better plan? Hmm?"

"You know very well I can when I am always fixing your sorry excuse of a plot that you know very well will fail you miserably." You spoke through clenched teeth, officers walking by as if it were normal. Which, it was. The two of you had been married for a few months now and it was common to see the two of you constantly bickering.

Something that was very common. Something that made First Order members question if the marriage truly was forced upon... even if you agreed to it in the end.

"You are a sorry excuse of a Supreme Leader!" You shouted as Kylo rolled his eyes.

"As if I have never heard that insult from you."

"Listen to me, Ren. I know what I am saying. If you go with this plan it will fail miserably and bite you in the ass." You pointed as Kylo crossed his arms.

"You'd like to see that, wouldn't you?"

"Of course I would." You said as if it were obvious. "But, as much as I love a good 'I told you so' you are my husband and I am not going to allow yourself to look like a complete idiot in front of your people."

" _Our_ people." He corrected, you now not only being a queen to your planet but a sort of... empress to the Order. "Will you be quiet and stop nagging if I take your advice?"

Standing quietly, you nodded. "...Yes."

"Fine." At that, Kylo walked away, but you weren't done with him.

" _Wait_!" Rushing over to him and grabbing his hand, you looked up at him.

"Yes?" He lifted a brow, looking down at you.

"I have news." Seeing his eyebrows narrow, you instantly tugged him into a room that was closest to you; to your luck it was empty.

"What is it?" He asked, you now holding both of his hands and smiling.

"I'm pregnant."

Feeling his eyes widen, Kylo's lips parted. "Really?"

"Mhm." You grinned with a nod, Kylo's wide eyes not leaving your own. "Aren't you happy? You'll finally get your heir."

"So will you, genius." Wrapping his arms around your waist, he instantly lifted you up. "Finally."

"Shut up, it hasn't been a year since we've gotten together." You shook your head as Kylo held you close, you only kissing the side of his head. "I blame you, so many tries and nothing."

"You're finally pregnant, aren't you?" He asked, face in your chest.

"Yes, because for once we weren't hate fucking." You stated as if it were obvious.

"What, do you want us to _make sweet love_ now?" Kylo mocked. "Is hate fucking too much for you?" Lifting his head to look at you, you rolled your eyes.

"You're an imbecile." You sighed. "Who I have... sadly grown to love."

Smirking up at you, he removed one of his arms from your waist before resting his hand on the back of your head, pressing it down to kiss you. "It's painful, isn't it?"

"Yes." You muttered against the kiss, pressing another small one against his lips. "I love you."

"I know." Lowering you down, he pressed a hard kiss against your cheek as you smiled. "Now get back to hating me."

"As you wish, Supreme Leader." You grinned, holding in a laugh before walking out, dropping your smile. "Like I said, you're an imbecile!"

Exiting the room right after you, Kylo sighed. "Tell me something new." Walking down the hall and continuing your argument, Kylo's hand reached into yours, fingers interlocking as either of you turned a corner.


	11. Divide and Unite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request: idk if you're taking requests but I have one you may like. a kylo one set during the events of tlj where he's all stressed about everything going on and that makes him kinda distant from you (married I guess?) and so that makes you feel sad/upset and one night when y'all are in bed you tell him "I love you" but he just doesn't respond so you cry urself to sleep and then the next day (or few days, whichever) he's apologetic and what not. angst but fluff you know?

The stress on Kylo Ren's shoulder's were unbearable. After the fall of the Starkiller Base, he had felt himself falling deeper in the madness of his mind.

He felt as if he wasn't progressing nor succeeding, he felt as if he was being held back... as if he weren't at his full potential. Just as before, when he was training to be a Jedi.

Kylo felt as if he were only being used by the Supreme Leader only to rid the Jedi and nothing more—when Kylo knew he could've done greater. He was promised for greater things, yet none had come.

So, he took it in himself. He allowed the Supreme Leader to toss him around like a rag doll, mess with his mind and "manipulate" him until he was satisfied. When, in reality, Kylo had a plan.

There was so much in his mind, plenty of factors that added to his plan. He knew what he had to do. He had to kill his past in order to become what he was meant to be.

Even if that meant distancing himself from you.

In reality, you were the only good that came from being under Snoke's guidance and ruling. As Kylo had trained and commanded the First Order, he had met you. A fine TIE fighter pilot, one of the greatest in the Order. You always got yourself out of everything—including an encounter with the well know Resistance pilot Poe Dameron.

You and Kylo had a unique relationship, he wasn't one to talk much and you were unsure as to how you even got together in the first place... yet, you found yourself married to him. And that was one thing Kylo had given to Snoke. He allowed Kylo to have such intimacy if that meant bearing a child who could more than likely be a Force user—which Kylo never went through with, he wasn't going to use you just to have a child.

He loved you.

Or so you thought he had.

Ever since Starkiller's destruction, Kylo had been very distant with you. Late nights unable to sleep without Kylo there to hold you... or for you to hold on to. Afternoons spent silently, not a sign of Kylo to stop by and greet you. Mornings spent lonely, no one to share coffee with or hello's to. And it was eating away at you.

You loved Kylo, you saw past the exterior he had built for himself like an armor. You saw the man he truly was... and not just someone who was broken, but someone who was strong and full of potential. Someone worth so much more... someone who was better than just being an apprentice pushed to do things.

And you liked to remind him often of that. Not to make him happy, but because you truly believed it in your heart.

But now it was hard to remind him when he barely even spoke to you... let alone, looked at you.

You wish things weren't changing between the two of you. You missed the way it was before, where he only showed you his sweet and caring side. When he held you close at night and in the morning. When he'd wake up from a nightmare only to have you cradle him. When you shared showers or baths... when you two were intimate and passionate.

Now you feared the fire was gone and the sparks were slowly disappearing on you. And you didn't want this. You never did. You were so attached... so in love with a man no one else was able to read but you.

But now? Now you couldn't even study him... now he kept his back turned to you and left you with a void. And you were starting to feel immense heart break. If he no longer wanted you by his side, he should've done something... not leave you to suffer.

Taking in a deep breath as you felt your chest ache from sadness and anger, you bit your bottom lip. You weren't going to give up on him. Not now, not ever. You never had.

Especially now when you knew just how much worse things were getting for him after taking the role of Supreme Leader. If anything, you were more than proud with his achievement... but at what cost?

Lying on your shared bed, back facing the door of the bedroom, you stared into the darkness as your sleep slipped from you. Your body and mind were exhausted... but you just couldn't sleep. Not without him beside you.

Hearing the bedroom door open, amongst shuffling and shifting, you felt the bed dip behind you as you knew Kylo had come to bed.

Turning over to face him, only to see his back facing you, you let out a small breath. Placing a gentle hand on his hard back, you wore a small smile. "I love you..." You softly spoke, in hopes he'd something.

But... the seconds passed, and the more they passed, the further downward your lips curved.

He didn't say anything. Not a single response left him. Just his breathing.

Feeling your eyes burn as your hand fell from his back, your blurry vision focused on the back of his head before you turned on your back. Staring at the ceiling and feeling a few tears slip, you brought the sheets to your face as you turned back to your original position, clenching your eyes shut as you softly cried out. Whimpering... fighting a sob. But with vibrations of your body trembling, Kylo could feel it.

He had hurt you... he was breaking your heart... and it was the last thing he wanted to do.

Unable to stop the ever-flowing river of tears, you eventually cried yourself to sleep that night, feeling an emptiness in your chest as if someone ripped your heart out.

The next morning, and the few that followed after, were hard. You cried yourself to sleep multiple times, waking up with puffy eyes. Your mind was set on that moment, the three words slipping your mouth from the bottom of your heart, only to get nothing in return.

You felt miserable. You felt unloved. Heartbroken. Torn... disappointed. Used. So many emotions flowed through you, so many that had you on the verge of multiple breakdowns.

It had a major affect on you, your piloting skills were off and so was your focus and attention. You were slacking and you were losing any and all interest in piloting when it once meant so much to you.

"Lieutenant Y/L/N?" Hearing someone call out from behind you as you walked down a hall, nearly dragging yourself, you saw a stormtrooper stand there. "The Supreme Leader requests you in the throne room."

Gulping, you bowed your head. "Thank you..." You breathed, voice shaking and nearly cracking. You couldn't possibly see Kylo, not when he nearly tore your heart right out of your chest as if it were nothing.

Sucking in a breath, you walked in the direction that lead you to the throne room. Never did you think being married to the Supreme Leader would be so terrible... not when you expected it to be so much better than when Kylo was a commander.

Coming to a stop in front of the door, you sucked in a breath and straightened your back, trying to hold your head high even if you knew it wouldn't last long.

Walking up to the doors as a pair of troopers opened them for you, you were instantly presented to the five knights that surrounded Kylo before your eyes landed on him, himself. "Excuse us." Kylo waved a hand, the knights nodding before exiting the throne room as you had walked in.

Standing in silence, lookin anywhere but at him, you felt your eyes burn. _Now is not the time to cry, show no weakness._

"Come closer." Kylo spoke, you doing so without hesitation. You didn't want anymore problems. "Look at me."

Staring at the ground, you took in a deep breath, unable to do so. You were scared to. It had been so long since you actually had seen his face that you were afraid of what you were going to see... afraid of what he was going to say.

"Y/N... look at me." He demanded, but you still didn't do it.

Standing from his throne, Kylo walked over to you, coming to a stop as his boots came in your line of vision, his gloved hands coming together before one removed the others glove. Your heart was racing and you were unsure as to why.

"Y/N... please." He nearly begged, but you refused.

Feeling his fingers press under your chin, lifting your head up, your eyes were still elsewhere. " _Please_..." His voice softened, your heart breaking.

Slowly looking him in the eyes, your heart ached as your eyes burned. "I can't do this..." You lowly spoke, voice cracking. "I can't suffer..."

"I'm sorry." He apologized, almost quickly. He had fear within himself, that he was allowing you to slip from his fingertips when that was the last thing he wanted. When you were the last person he wanted to lose.

"You don't love me." You shook your head, eyes shifting away agains as you felt tears slip. "You don't love me like you used to..."

Sitting in brief silence, hearing nothing but the battlecruisers hum, your heart raced. So he didn't love you? "I do." Kylo spoke, breaking the silence. "I do love you... I never meant for you to feel... unloved. I'm sorry."

Shifting your eyes back to his, you felt your bottom lip tremble. "Then why couldn't you say it back to me that night? Why can't you show it any more?"

"Because..." Taking in a deep breath, he kept his focus on your eyes. "Because I'm overwhelmed. I'm stressed. I have so much weight on my shoulders... I thought I'd be relieved by ridding Snoke from his reign... but now I've only found more."

"Kylo..."

"I know, it's no excuse to neglect you. I am upset in myself for doing so... and no amount of apology can fix that. But, I do... I do love you. I do." He admitted. "I have been... And I know marriage doesn't prove the fact, but to me it does." Kylo said, removing his other glove to hold your cheeks. "Because, I can't rule the galaxy without you by my side. I need you."

"Then don't ignore me." You shook your head. "Let me in... Let me be beside you. Let me do what I did before with commander Kylo Ren." You breathed. "Let me love Supreme Leader Kylo Ren."

Shifting his eyes between your own, he slowly nodded. "I love you, Kylo. I really do. So very much... but you can't push me away. Not when you know you love me, too."

"I won't." He shook his head. "I truly am sorry."

Slowly nodding your head, your hands moved to his shoulders as you tiptoed, pressing a kiss to his lips. "Keep me close..." You muttered. "And I promise, we will get through this together."

Nodding his head, kissing you back, Kylo's hands moved to your waist, encasing them in his arms as he held you close to him, embracing you in a tight hold. As if he never wanted to let go... because he truly never wanted to.

Kissing the side of your head, Kylo burried his face in to your neck, leaving a small kiss. "Thank you."

 


	12. Erased

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request: Could I get a tlj fluffy request please? Kylo keeps constantly getting these visions of the reader. When snoke is killed, kylo finally meets the reader when they arrive on snokes ship to see that he is dead and meet the new supreme leader. The reason he could see her is because they were together at the Jedi temple but were split to train under snoke. When they are reunited they remember each other. Remember that snoke manipulated their minds to forget each other and the feelings they once had

The sight before him felt familiar. But, he couldn't remember. Someone... lying there beside him, gazing at him with the softest of looks. They seemed so gentle, so... precious. But, who were they?

That smile... it was genuine. It made his heart race. In a way it never had before. Or, so he believed. There was something about it, something about the face he was looking at that tugged at his heart. At the Force.

Looking into their eyes, the way they looked deeply into his, as if seeing past the person he was, Kylo couldn't help but feel his eyes water. What was this? Who were they? And why was he constantly dreaming about the same person?

Watching as they reached out to him, their hand lying against his cheek and brushing against the bone, he was about to reach out and pull them close to him, but they vanished. "No..." He shook his head, sitting up and searching the bed. "No... No!" He panted. "NO!"

Forcing himself awake, feeling the fresh tears stain his cheeks, he sat up with a low growl. Gritting his teeth and clutching onto his sheets, he looked over at his holo-clock, only to toss it across the room with the Force. Half past three in the morning. This is why he never slept enough, he always had nightmares... or dreams that were always ruined.

Rubbing the heels of his palms against his eyes, he slouched. He couldn't keep having these dreams... visions, whatever they may be. They were daily, nightly... in his dreams and daydreams. No matter when, he saw them. And they were only becoming more frequent.

It started when he was at the viewpoint, eyeing the stars to calm  
himself down. He felt a presence to the left of him. No one dared bother Kylo at moments like those... But when he looked over, he had seen someone he had never seen before.

They were dressed in black, hair tied back in a loose braid, body being engulfed by the cloak they had worn.

He wanted to be furious, how dare someone interrupt him? But then he realized, they weren't even reacting to his glare. Were they oblivious? Were they trying to get on his nerves? Or were they not actually there...

Turning himself and eyeing the woman, just about to speak up, they only turned and walked away, disappearing into the darkness. As if they _weren't_ there moments ago.

He didn't have time to deal with puzzling visions and dreams, not when he was dealing with more important issues.

The Supreme Leader was losing faith in Kylo. He was belittling him. Losing trust. He no longer saw Kylo Ren as a powerful Force being. No longer saw him as someone who could defeat the Jedi or bring the First Order success.

No, he saw Kylo as a child in a mask. A child who could never be like Darth Vader.

But the more and more Kylo was seen as unimportant and useless, he realized he didn't want to repeat the past. No. He wanted to better his future. Do what his grandfather couldn't do. Finish what he failed to complete. And to do that, he had to let the past die. He had to kill it. Eradicate it. Remove it from blocking his path.

And he knew what he had to do.

Standing and overlooking the men and women working around you, you felt a disturbance in the Force. A missing link... something that had been taken away. Death

Shifting your eyes to the side, searching through the Force, your eyes slightly grew in size. Something happened. Something much bigger than the Force made it seem.

The Supreme Leader. Your Master. You could no longer feel him.

Swallowing, your eyes narrowed for a moment. There was no sense of his presence, he was no longer felt in the Force. Had something happened?

Searching once again, you felt nothing. Absolutely nothing. But, you felt as if a weight was lifted from your shoulders. A sort of... freedom.

Not wanting to get your hopes up, you turned on your heel and aimed for the hangar, knowing very well you had to see it for yourself.

"Where to?" The pilot asked as you boarded your personal shuttle.

"The Supremacy."

Standing there with heavy breaths, eyeing his surroundings and seeing the mass of lifeless bodies—Snoke at the center—Kylo took in a deep breath. It had to be done, it was the only way he, and the Order, could move forward. Snoke was only holding him back, preventing him from becoming what he was meant to be. The Supreme Leader.

Wiping the sweat from his face, deactivating his lightsaber and clipping it to his belt, he used the Force to move Snokes lifeless body off and away from the throne. It was no longer his to claim.

No, now it was Kylo's. And no one could stop him. Not even Hux.

Hux, the angered red head that now exited the lift and saw the disaster before him. The slaughtered Praetorian guards and... the sliced in half Supreme Leader. "What... Happened?!" Hux snapped as he stared at Snoke's lifeless body, Kylo taking a seat on the throne.

"The Supreme Leader is gone." Kylo spoke, sitting on the throne, knowing very well it was meant for him. "He will no longer guide us. We are under a new ruling."

Shifting his eyes over to Kylo, enraged, teeth clenched as he pulled out his blaster, Kylo flicked his wrist as the blaster went flying, crashing against the wall as Hux fell to his knees, forcibly.

"You will kneel before your new Supreme Leader and show the respect you've lacked all these years." Kylo spoke through tight teeth, cutting off Hux's airways. "Be grateful that I haven't demoted you... yet."

Looking up at Kylo with an angered expression, clawing at his throat, Kylo waved a hand as Hux gasped for air. "Get out of my sight."

Just about to reach for his blaster, Kylo only pulled it further away from the General with the Force, the man cursing under his breath before leaving the throne room.

He was seething. This was unbelievable. That throne was supposed to be his when the time would come. Not Kylo's. He knew he was in a world of trouble now.

Exiting the shuttle the moment it landed and lowered its ramp, you walked out of the hangar and into the halls. You had done this numerous of times. Especially when it came to training or physically reporting to the man.

But now, now you weren't so miserable. Now you weren't dragging yourself or forcing yourself to seem the least bit flattered. You knew very well the Supreme Leader was holding back on you. Not giving you his best. Not showing you all there was.

He slacked. He neglected you. He acted as if you being a ranked officer with the Order was far more important than training because _soon, the time would come where you come to play_ , but, you weren't willing to wait any longer. You weren't some puppet. Not a weapon or a sort of plot device.

No, you were a person. A powerful being who deserved it all and more.

And that fact that you couldn't feel—or sense—an inkling of the Supreme Leader said it all.

Aiming for the lift, you only saw a disgruntled officer—General Hux—pass you by. Another man you could hardly swallow with how much of a, in simple terms, kiss ass he was. You wondered if he had done something or something had actually happened. But he seemed so bothered, so aggravated, his anger boiled and radiated off of him. What happened?

Entering the lift, you stood there and took in a deep breath, waiting. Your anticipation was growing on you and you were slowly becoming anxious. You didn't know what to expect. What if Snoke had shut you off for a reason? What if this was all some sort of scheme that you walked right into? What if he was tired of you that he found no use in you any longer?

Your mind was racing with infinite possibilities and all the "what if's", driving you over the edge only for your mind to come to a sudden halt the moment the doors opened before you.

Eyeing the bodies that decorated the ground, your eyes landed on the Supreme Leader... split in half. It was morbid and stomach turning... but, you couldn't help but wear the faintest of smiles. He was gone. And he was gone for good.

Keeping his eyes on the ground, eyeing the bodies he'd soon have to dispose, Kylo's head instantly snapped up as he felt a presence. A familiar presence... one he knew he felt before but couldn't put a finger on who.

Instantly standing from the throne, his heart skipped a beat. You. That face... that hair... the attire. He recognized you. The one in his visions... in his dreams... He knew you. He could feel it.

Lifting your eyes from Snoke, over to the man who was sitting at the throne—the new Supreme Leader, you believed—your heart dropped.

Something within you snapped. Something was put back together.   
Something was remembered.

That face... that face was hard to miss. It was so unique. It was familiar. Your heart was racing at the sight. You knew this man, you could feel it in your chest. You could feel it in the Force.

Slowly walking towards you as his eyes never left your own, you had done the same. There was a gravitational pull, the Force was bringing the two of you together. You knew him. You knew you knew him. You could tell. The familiarity of his face... in his eyes.

This was someone who had been ripped from you.

Coming to a stop before each other, your eyes searched his own as his did to yours. Your chest was heaving now, memories you once lost now resurfacing. "I know you..." You nearly whispered, gazing at him.

Feeling the warmth in his chest, the recognization of your face... the remembrance of who you were. It all now made sense. The visions. The dreams. The memories he had once with you, they were back and clearer than ever.

His past lover. The person Snoke ripped from him.

"Y/n..." He breathed, looking down at you, gloved hand shakily reaching out to you.

"Snoke kept us apart... He manipulated us." You said as you made the revelation. "He split us... To train us separately."

"He's dead. None of that matters now." Kylo shook his head, resting his hand on your cheek. "I'm the Supreme Leader. No one can tear us apart like that again."

Blinking as you looked up at him, you nodded before you reached to clutch the back of his head, fingers entangled in his hair as you tugged him down. It had been too long... It felt like eternity since you had been this close to him. To feel his warmth, to feel his lips against your own.

Lowering his hands to your waist, pulling you even closer to him, Kylo moved his lips against your own hungrily. Desperately. Trying to make up for all the time lost. He had you now and he wasn't going to miss any second of it.

Sloppily kissing him back, sucking on his bottom lip as he took in a deep breath, Kylo's forehead then rested against your own as you took in deep breaths. Gently getting a hold of your jaw, Kylo peppered your cheeks with kisses. "Join me. Rule by my side." He breathed against your skin before looking you in the eye. "I will let nothing stand in our way."


	13. Leather (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request: Omg i feel so dirty but can you write a fic about the reader grinding on kylos thigh to get off somehow!!

You hated those intense looks Kylo Ren would give you as he walked by. The way he'd purposely turn his head in your direction to make it obvious that _you_ were his focus. That _you_ were the only one he had eyes for.

Or, really, the only one he liked tormenting through such bone chilling stares.

But, they weren't bone chilling for the matter that you were scared. No. You were _turned on_.

You liked the dominance he asserted, the way he held himself so highly, how he was above everyone else. The Supreme Leader. The man who took charge. Which such high authority brought high confidence, and the confidence was rattling your bones.

You always had your eyes on Kylo, he was always a sight to see. Dare to say, it was a blessing to have him around. All others claimed you were insane to be so... intrigued by him. To be interested and curious. But, your curiosity—and your lack of fear—was what caught _his_ attention.

There had always been something about that dark, mysterious, and _very_ dangerous man that hid behind thick layers of black and an ominous helmet. Something about that jagged lightsaber and the glorious ways he had fought with it that had you swooning.

Out of all people, you were enthralled in _the_ Kylo Ren.

And it almost seemed as if the feelings were mutual...

Or so you believed.

You constantly found yourself near him, whether in a room, in a hall, or even in a meeting. He was always there, quiet and staring. And the way the chills ran throughout your body, had you shivering and wanting to press your knees together to the point that they'd merge, you knew there was something.

And it wasn't hate.

No.

There was something more to it. Something... strong.

Lust? Desire? Want? Greediness? You weren't sure.

"All final reviews have been made on the blueprints. Starkiller Bass II is in the works, General." You bowed your head as you spoke, explaining the schematics and detail that would be put into the new base. Stronger shields, higher security, all the good stuff that would prevent yet another disaster.

Hux's words had so easily flowed through your ears as he had spoken. You understood him, word for word, but your focus wavered. You felt that sensation you always felt when someone was watching. When _he_ was watching.

The hairs on the back of your neck stood, your stomach churned as your heart skipped a beat. Somehow you knew, the look you were receiving wasn't as usual. No, the look now was burning holes into your back. Shooting daggers and harshly piercing you.

Gulping, you casually looked over your shoulder to prove your theory—Kylo Ren was watching you from afar. Creeping. _Lurking_. Watching you intently with anger and... _jealousy?_ in his eyes.

The envy you assumed he had made you smirk. You liked the idea of him being jealous. You _adored_ the concept of him wanting you and allowing no one else but himself to have you. For some reason, you wanted him to claim you as his. You wanted him to say _mine_ and press his large hands against your body as he bit your skin harshly.

The lewd thoughts were making your chest heave as your skin grew hot—as well as your imagination.

Kylo would grab your upper arm, pin you against the wall, kiss you until your mouths went numb and _oh so_ casually fuck you in front of everyone if that's what it took to make sure that no one would dare touch you.

And with such vivid thoughts, you nearly whimpered and caught Hux's attention. "Are you alright?"

Clearing your throat, you nodded. "Of course, yes." You said, still feeling the eyes bore into your back, still hoping _he'd_ do _something_.

"Oh, lovely." Hux sighed, muttering under his breath unintentionally, hoping you hadn't heard—but you had. His words weren't directed towards you. Rather, towards the figure that now towered behind you like a shadow against a wall. "Supreme Leader, sir—" Hux bowed but was instantly dismissed with a wave of the black leather hand that appeared beside you.

"Leave us." Kylo spoke, voice low and demanding.

Blinking a few times, back still facing him, your heart raced. You took in deep breaths to steady out your sudden anxiety—whether it'd be for fear or excitement—you knew the presence behind you had you trembling.

"Follow me." Kylo ordered, you blinking a few times before turning on your heel and doing so.

You watched as his broad shoulders held his black cape that flowed behind him like a ghost. The way his long strides carried him as everyone made way for him. And just by how they all stared at you, you knew they believed you to be in deep water. As if you were just about to be reprimanded (or worse) murdered.

Realizing where he had been taking you as the surroundings grew familiar, you quietly swallowed as your palms began to sweat. The throne room. You should've been more fearful for your life—although unsure as to why—yet, you were in awe. He was leading you to his throne. Literally. Kylo had entered and had yet to tell you stop.

The throne wasn't as large as the one he'd soon receive on the new base, but, still... it took long enough to reach the dead center before his throne was just parallel to you.

You kept walking, following, all the way until Kylo came to a sudden stop. Had he forgotten you were following? That would've been embarrassing...

But then, he turned and faced you. His dark eyes bored into your own, eyeing you intensely, staring into your soul.

You shuddered, your heart lodged up your throat as you craned your neck upwards to look him in the eye. Were you supposed to speak first? Was he? You were unsure of what was even happening. He just stood there, quiet, watching.

Prey versus predator.

That was the look in those devilishly stunning eyes of his.

Quietly gulping as you sensed he was lifting his hand, not daring to waver your focus from him, Kylo's gloved fingers latched onto your chin. "You." He simply spoke as your breath hitched.

 _Me_. You thought. What about you? Why was he so... quiet?

Feeling his thumb rub against your cheek as you took in a deep breath through your nose, you suddenly felt the leather material against your bottom lip, pressing against it and nearly lowering it.

You were dreaming. You must've been. Your twisted fantasies were getting its payback and making it all feel very, _very_ vivid.

Then, you felt the sudden pressure against your lips. _His_ lips. Roughly moving along yours, begging for a response.

It hadn't hit you that he was kissing you, not until your eyes widened at the sight of his staring right at you before closing as he pressed his tongue against your lips.

Feeling your heart sink as your eyes fluttered closed, your lips parted as his tongue assaulted your own. You were quick to respond, kissing him back just as roughly—or, at least you tried. The hand that was on your chin engulfed the back of your neck as his other pressed against your lower back, bringing you into him.

Your heart raced as you felt his bulge press against your lower abdomen. This had to have been a dream. The Supreme Leader couldn't possibly be hard for you?

But, you took it. You took _it_ in your hand only to earn a swat from him and a gasp from you. "Hands to yourself." He demanded as you whined, but suddenly, you felt your hands press into your sides.

So, he was using the Force on you?

Lowering his kisses from your bottom lip, sucking it before pulling back, he trailed his kisses down your neck and growled at your high collared uniform before ripping it right down the middle and exposing you.

You gasped, the cold air nipping at your skin as the thin bra you wore wasn't enough coverage. Your chest heaved more as you panted, his teeth gliding against your collar before nipping and licking at the smooth skin. The sweet moans that left your parted lips caused Kylo to groan before he held tightly onto your hips, kissing down your stomach before reaching the hem of your pants.

"Please..." You cried out, eyes instantly shooting open as you were just about to cover your mouth. Then you realized you couldn't. Your hands were still bound by an invisible force.

"Please, what?" He nearly hissed, looking up at you dangerously as you looked down, nearly shrieking at the sight.

"I—" Unable to speak, words getting caught in your throat, you sucked in a shaky breath. "My apologies, Supreme Leader." At your words, you could've sworn you saw a faint smirk on his lips. He liked the sound of you calling him by his title, especially in such situation.

Undoing your belt and pants, Kylo lowered it, letting it scrunch up at your boots before he snaked his way back up your body, letting his gloved hands glide up your sides as you shivered. His tongue dragged along your stomach before you felt his heavy breathing against your neck. "You are my toy now."

Trying to steady out your breathing, you slowly nodded as your eyes fluttered.

Just as Kylo was about to kiss you once again, his gloved hand dipped into your underwear and found their way to your clit as you gasped—that is until his kiss caught it.

Sloppily kissing you as his hand lowered even more, Kylo found your entrance and slid a finger in as you moaned out. Your lips parted as his tongue grazed along your own. Feeling his finger pump within you, knowing it wasn't enough, he added a second.

You couldn't help it, your knees buckled as your hips jerked to meet his fingers. And that didn't sit well with Kylo.

With the sudden feeling of emptiness, you whimpered as he lifted his glove. You were so close, your orgasm begging for release, only to see his fingers now before you. "Kylo..." You whimpered, looking him in the eye as he stared back, shaking his head.

Watching him back up, slumping into his throne with his legs spread apart and forearms resting along the arm rests, you gulped. Lifting his hand, his index and middle waved, gesturing for you to walk towards him.

Looking down and realizing you were restrained from your pants, Kylo waved a hand as you were able to move your own again, stripping your boots and pants off before walking up to him—but he lifted his hand, halting you. " _All_ of it." He gestured to your undergarments.

Feeling your heart race in excitement, you unhooked your bra and let it fall from your shoulders before lowering your panties as Kylo's eyes scanned you. It was far more intense than any other time. As if you were the most prized item in the entire galaxy.

Tapping his thigh as you sucked in a breath, you walked over to him ever so slowly, unintentionally sauntering as you swayed your hips. Even if you were more than anxious about it all, a part of you—that was anticipating this—wanted to take advantage. And you could see that want in Kylo's eyes as they grow darker.

Straddling his thigh, your body shivered at the feeling of the cold leather material against your folds.

Looking Kylo in the eyes, bouncing between the two, he reached with one hand and held both of your wrists behind your back. "Move." He demanded as your breath hitched.

Pulling your hips back and moving forward, you whimpered, feeling the stimulation against your clit. "Again." Kylo ordered as you did so; then again, and again, until you lost yourself and began riding his thigh.

Your heart raced as your mouth fell open, moans flowing sweetly from your parted lips as your eyebrows narrowed. Squeezing your eyes shut as you picked up your pace, feeling yourself soaking his thigh, you cried out.

Watching you intently, eyes trailing your body, he reached for your nipple and pinched, bringing his mouth to your other and biting as you whined. His mouth littered your breasts in red blotches, sucking and biting on the pert nub as your pace grew staggered.

You were losing yourself, your orgasm was burning within you as you moaned and cried out. The feeling of his lips against you and your bundle of nerves rubbing against the leather had your heart racing. "Kylo..." You breathed.

Removing his lips from you, he grabbed onto your chin and made you look him in the eyes. "What did you call me?" He asked as you panted.

" _Kylo_." You gritted your teeth as his eyes grew.

Letting go of your chin, he lifted your hips and plunged two of his fingers into your entrance, pumping quickly, curling them as you yelled out. Adding a third finger, making you moan from the pleasure that burned your body, you felt tears build up in your eyes as your orgasm crashed.

Slowly riding his fingers, coming off of your high, slumping forward, Kylo reached for your hair and tugged it back as his held his hand in your line of vision. Your cum dripped from his gloved fingers as you watched with hooded eyes. "Lick them." Kylo said as you opened your mouth, allowing him to bring his fingers into your mouth as you licked at the leather material.

Just as you had been swirling your tongue around his fingers, tasting yourself and squeezing your eyes shut, you heard a distant gasp. Turning your head with Kylo's fingers still in your mouth, your nearly closed eyes widened at the sight of Hux.

"I—" Unable to say anything as Kylo growled, Hux turned and scurried off before Kylo could do any harm to him.

Pulling his fingers from your mouth, Kylo held your chin once again before slamming his lips against yours. "This won't be the last time I'll be seeing you."


	14. Transfixed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request for after TLJ: With Kylo Ren being the new Supreme Leader, he nows more about his workers than he did before. So when he meets the reader, someone who exists outside of the Force, he becomes intrigued and starts to interact with her more.

The First Order was under a new ruling. Everything had changed and the atmosphere was different. At least, for most. You hardly noticed it, especially when you were rarely around those in the higher ups.

You were aware of the previous Supreme Leader, but never had you interacted with them before. You knew they were powerful and the highest title you could possibly receive in the First Order. Possibly why you made sure to never make the chance to interact with them.

The stories were heavily passed around. The man was old. Some say he was a creature. Others say he was a human who had been deformed. That he was taller than anyone else on the Finalizer. That his powers were immense and strong... you had even heard stories that the previous Supreme Leader was able to use the Force through a hologram. Which was quite impressive.

But now came along a new Supreme Leader.

Things around the First Order were the same for you, unlike the rest. You still had a job, a post to be at, food to eat... a bed to rest on and so on. Nothing had changed. Nothing was different. You had a... semi ordinary life aside from the fact that you worked with a military organization.

Your job wasn't anything out of this world. You were a typical First Order officer who was supposed to get something from one place to another. Transmit a few files. Make sure a few documents were sent on time. Basic office work. But, you didnt complain. It was better than being a stormtrooper who would have to deal with odd schedules and constant physical labor.

Mind you, battles.

You had never really used a blaster before nor any of the fancy weapons they had. Your life, as mentioned before, was simple. You came from an average family of an average planet. The only reason why you had this job was because your uncle was kind enough to slip in a good word for you.

Other than that, you lived simply. Had days off, had a few friends, socialized... tried to stay healthy and live a decent life.

But, soon things would change for you.

Relocation was something common for you. You've been relocated a few times. From vessel to vessel, even on Starkiller Base. Lucky for you, you had been relocated to the Finalizer before the satellite's destruction.

Now, you found yourself relocating to the Supremacy. A vessel you've heard of but barely knew about. Only that the Supreme Leader lived on it. Someone you probably would hardly see with the mere job you had.

Settling into your new chamber after a day off of moving in, you changed into your uniform, put your hair in a low bun and gathered the work you had transferred over. You were going to start your day earlier than usual, wanting to get used to the new ship and get into the hang of things. Lucky for you, some of your friends had been transferred over.

"I'm curious, have any of you encountered the new Supreme Leader yet?" One of the officers spoke as they stood to a side, drinking their coffee.

"I rather not. Isn't it Kylo Ren? The man who was once the Commander who started all sorts of ruckus and trouble?" Another officer spoke.

"Yeah, I believe it's him. I rarely pay attention to the upper rankings, but it's hard to dismiss _that."_

"Did you hear the rumors? That he was the one to kill the Supreme Leader?" Another officer chipped in.

"I thought it was some Resistance scum?" One of the previous answered.

"No way. Lots of people believe he killed Snoke, that she was just a coverup for the truth." An officer smirked with a wink. "You know how powerful Ren is. I wouldn't doubt it if he was planning this all along."

"What are you guys talking about?" You asked, getting some tea to start off your morning. Although you slept enough, you liked to feel relaxed by the drink.

"Just the Supreme Leader. What do you think of him?" One of the officers, who you remembered to go by the name of Pell, said to you as she lifted a brow.

"Oh, I don't know much about either of them. The previous or the new." You shrugged, setting up your tea before taking your sips. "I just know it's best to stay far away. Never know what they can do."

"A wise choice, y/l/n." Dain, an officer, had nodded in agreement.

"I'm just here to work and get things done, I don't really have time to gossip or focus on other things." Sipping at your tea and gathering your files that you had sat down for a moment, you walked backwards. "But, hey, I hope I'm on his good side if our paths ever cross!" At that, you saluted before leaving the break room, aiming for your station.

Walking down the halls, easily remembering where you had to go, you drink away at your tea. Your first day of work on the Supremacy was going well so far, but you didn't want to jinx it.

"Y/l/n? Y/l/n! There you are!" Hearing a voice from ahead of you call out, you lifted your head. "Pick up your pace!"

Scrunching your eyebrows, you looked at the time on your data pad. "Lieutenant Tonor, I don't understand, I still have ten minutes till my shift-"

"That isn't of importance! We have an important visitor coming to our station!" Feeling the Lieutenant's hand grab onto your arm and tug you away, you rushed along. "We must be prepared! Who knows what he'll think..."

"He?" You questioned, approaching your station. "Who's he?"

"Now is not the time, just... do your work! Act busy!" The man waved his hand.

"But I am busy-"

"Stop wasting time!" He called out, rushing away from your station as you sighed. You spoke to soon. You shouldn't have said anything about your day.

Settling in your spot, finishing your tea and going straight into your work, you heard low chattering from behind you. Trying to dismiss it as you worked on the files, uploading data, the chattering grew louder.

Looking over your shoulder and seeing two officers lean towards each other as they whispered to one another, your eyebrows knitted. Could they not save the gossip for later? Scanning the room, you realized everyone else was exchanging looks. Why was everyone so on edge? Did you miss something? Did you not get the memo?

Was it about what Lieutenant Tonor said?

Dismissing it, you returned to your work, getting as much done as you possibly could in order to submit the files. You just wanted the day to go swiftly and easily, no sort of problems or anxiety driven issues to deal with.

Standing from your post and gathering the files you had finished inputting, you walked over to submit them, a few stations down. You were so focused on the files that you hadn't realized everyone suddenly grew silent. Dead silent. As if no one was there.

It didn't hit you until you were about to walk back to your post, only to be stopped. "Officer y/l/n." Lifting your head up and looking over at Lieutenant Tonor, you blinked. He was oddly... smiley, for your liking. You could tell something wasn't right with the way his grin looked forced. "One of our newest additions that had been transferred over from the Finalizer."

Squinting your eyes for a second, you slowly nodded. "Lieutenant Tonor..." You spoke in a questioning tone, unsure as to what was happening. He was acting as if he hadn't yelled at you early to get to your post even though you were early.

"Y/l/n, the Supreme Leader has paid us a visit." Hearing his words and feeling them bounce against the walls of your mind, you blinked. Did you hear him right? Seeing the Lieutenant gesture his hand, your eyes followed it, landing on a pair of black boots before trailing up.

Black, nothing but black. Black pants, boots, top... cape. Even their hair. Making eye contact with the man—the Supreme Leader—your heart suddenly skidded to a stop.

And so had his.

Quietly swallowing and taking in a small breath, you nervously bit on your bottom lip as you tried diverting your eyes. But, you couldn't. There was no way you could look away now. You were so consumed in his eyes that it felt nearly impossible to do so.

"I see you have everything handled here." The Supreme Leader spoke, his voice sending chills down your spine. He had been speaking over to your Lieutenant, but he kept his focus locked on you, making your insides twist. It was such an intense gaze, no one had ever looked at you like that—and for so long—before. You weren't even sure if he had blinked.

"Yes, Supreme Leader, sir." The Lieutenant bowed his head, oblivious to what seemed like a stare down between the two of you. He was more worried about his ass being fired—or worse—than to pay attention to what was happening before him.

"Good." The Supreme Leader nodded his head once. "You may return to your work. I've seen enough."

Bowing his head, the Lieutenant turned you with him, peeling you from the heavy gaze. Looking over your shoulder for a moment and seeing the man linger there, your heart raced. The one thing you told yourself to do, you completely dismissed it. But, you weren't in control. It just happened.

Taking in a quiet, deep breath, Kylo Ren walked away. His heart was beating harshly against his chest and his blood was pumping within his hears.

He had never seen you before, and you've worked on the Finalizer? He had to know more. He didn't know why, but he found himself intrigued in you. You were so beautiful and... captivating. He had to get to know you better. Somehow.

Spending the rest of your day with a clogged mind, the image of the Supreme Leader's face running through your thoughts, you took in a deep breath as you lied in bed. He seemed so fascinated in you and you were sure you seemed the same way.

The fire in his eyes were so bright... the passion, the power. You were sure it was all because of his title, but you wanted to know more.

_No, he is the Supreme Leader... your boss. Keep your promise._

Huffing at your thoughts and underlining desires, you rolled to your side and pushed your hair away from your cheek and behind your ear. There was no way you'd get him off of your mind, not when his gaze was imprinted into your memories. Let alone, brain.

Sitting on his large bed, reading up on your file, Kylo took in a deep breath. He felt like a creep. He had taken a data pad that was restricted and locked with information... just to learn about you.

Your full name, age, height... your home planet. The positions and placements you've had before. Enough to know some about you. At least you weren't too much younger than him, just a few years apart.

Tossing the data pad to a side and lying back on his bed, Kylo let out a deep breath of air, rubbing his eyes before pushing his hand through his hair. You were compelling... and you hadn't said a single word to him. Nothing but your eyes. And your eyes had said it all.

Then, he thought about your face. How gentle it looked, how badly he wanted to caress your cheek or kiss your forehead. The way your lips sat together, seeming perfect for his... your hair and how he'd want to undo it from the bun it was in.

He was feeling so desperate. He was feeling lonely. Lonelier than he was before. Now with this higher position, being the Supreme Leader—a title no other could surpass—his loneliness crept on him. Unlike before, where he was lonely, he was distracted. He had so much on his mind, so much to do, that his loneliness was the least of his matters.

But now, now that he had a throne to himself and an organization to run alone... he couldn't stand the emptiness beside him. The lack of company. No one to wake up to in the morning or to sleep with at night.

Lowering his hands and staring at the ceiling, he sat back up. He was the Supreme Leader now, he could do whatever he pleased. No one could hold him back from getting what he wanted.

And that's exactly what he was going to do.

Starting off your day like you had your previous, you walked with a cup of tea in your hold as you aimed for your post. Turning a corner, you suddenly collided with someone, your tea just about to spill on them until it stopped in thin air.

Growing wide eyed at the sight, the contents flowed back into your cup as a gloved hand reached for it. "My apologies."

Hearing the familiar voice, you instantly looked up, shaking your head. "N-no, it's my fault. I'm sorry, Supreme Leader, sir." You frantically spoke, afraid he was upset... but the look on his face said otherwise.

"No need to apologize, and, please... Call me Kylo." The man said as he handed over your cup, you looking him in the eye and slowly nodded.

"Thank you, Kylo." That sounded better than he thought. The way your voice spoke his name was music to his ears.

"Always." He faintly grinned, your heart fluttering. "Have a good day." At that, he walked off, you looking over.

During your shift, you took longer to drink your tea... and do your work. The Supreme Leader—Kylo—was fogging up your mind. He was being so... kind towards you. Nothing you expected. Your fears liked to scare you senseless with false ideas.

Taking a small break to get something to drink, you aimed for the break room, only to see a familiar face walk down the hall. And they saw you. "Y/n." Kylo bowed his head.

"H-hello... Ky-lo..." You stuttered, cheeks burning.

"On a break, I see." He said, coming to a stop in front of you.

"Yes... I was thirsty." You truthfully spoke, taking in a small breath.

"Ah, I see. I must be in your way-"

"N-no!" You waved your hands with a small chuckle. "You're fine, believe me. I'm in no rush."

"It's kind of you to make time for your Supreme Leader." He smirked as you sucked in a breath.

"Yes, well, it'd be awfully rude of me if I hadn't." You nodded, but Kylo couldn't help but grin.

"I appreciate it." He bowed his head. "But, please, let me not stop you." Kylo gestured for you to walk on as you gave him a small smile before walking away.

Soon, he'd make you his.

_————_

Nearly a week had passed since your first encounter with Kylo Ren. Within those few days, you had been seeing more and more of him than any other person—including your Lieutenant. It was almost as if he was everywhere you looked.

At first, you were a bit... scared. A man as powerful as him constantly interacting with you? Something must've been wrong. But then you realized he was being genuine. He was nothing like what the stories made him out to be, at least, not towards you. He was actually friendly... and, truly, that was nice to have. A friend in someone.

"Good morning, Kylo." You greeted, spotting the man as he walked up to you.

"Good morning." Kylo responded. He seemed a little uneasy and on edge. Something was off... or, at least, something wasn't right. You couldn't tell if he was already having a bad morning or if there was more to it

"Is everything alright?" You asked, looking over and up at him as he took in a small breath.

"Of course." He lied. Everything wasn't alright, he was anxious. "Y/n, are you free tonight?" Kylo suddenly asked as your eyebrows lifted.

"I'm always free." You softly laughed.

"Wonderful... well, wonderful that you are free tonight." Kylo nodded. "Would you like to have dinner with me?"

Feeling a smile grow on your lips, you gave him a nod. "That sounds lovely, of course."

"Perfect, I will see you then." At that, Kylo bowed his head before walking away, leaving you standing there with a grin. You couldn't believe that you actually made a friend out of the Supreme Leader.

Your day had gone by smoothly and swiftly, the second your shift had ended was the second you retreated to your chambers. Taking a second shower, you changed into something nice for the dinner. You didn't want to be tied back in all of your uniform so you decided to wear and nice dress. Something long sleeve and decent, not too revealing.

It was a respectful amount of skin you were showing. After all, this was dinner with _the_ Supreme Leader.

Putting your hair in a low bun, having a few strands hang loosely, you heard a knock on your door, you instantly walking over and answering it. "Kylo." You smiled as he looked down at you, eyeing your attire.

"You look beautiful." Blushing, you thanked him before he offered his arm, you grabbing hold before walking down the hallway.

Kylo has made sure that everything was perfect for you, the set up, the food... all of it. So, when you were walked to the table set up in a large room that sat near four large windows that presented the stars, you lightly gasped. "This is lovely..."

Proud of his work, Kylo grinned. "I truly hope you enjoy." Turning your head to look at him, seeing him hold a glass of wine, you grinned.

"I'm sure I will." You said, lifting your glass before taking a sip.

And, you were right. The evening went beautifully. Small talk being shared between the two of you, your attention constantly being caught by the stars as Kylo's eyes were constantly caught by you. You seemed far more stunning than the night sky.

Now standing beside one another, eyeing the stars, Kylo took in a small breath. He wanted to hold you close, to bring you to him, but he didn't want to scare you away. "Kylo, thank you for all of this." You said, turning your head and looking up at him. With the low lighting, you could hardly make out his freckles and beauty marks. But, you knew they were there. Much like the stars behind the glass window.

"Anything for you." He lowly spoke, words coming out soft and almost in a whisper, making you shiver.

Gazing at one another, eyes studying every inch of his beautiful face—as he did to yours—you lowered your gaze. "I should return back to my quarters..."

Slowly nodding his head, he placed his hand on the small of your back before guiding you away, the two of you entering the brightly lit up lift. Standing in a comfortable silence, Kylo's hand still on your back, you took in a small breath.

Kylo couldn't help but keep his eyes on of you, gazing down and admiring the angel you seemed to be in his eyes. Your beauty, your personality, all you had to offer. He knew you must've been the one.

Feeling his eyes on you, you slowly looked up at him, the sudden tension making your heart race. Kylo couldn't hold back any longer, he couldn't wait.

Turning enough for his free hand to hold your chin, he slowly lowered himself, lips brushing against your own as your stomach began to horde with butterflies that so badly wanted you to close the gap.

Feeling your eyes flutter to a close, you lifted yourself a bit on your toes as your lips came into contact with his. A warm feeling moved through your veins as the world around you suddenly fell mute. His lips were far softer than you could've imagined. So gentle and smooth, he was taking his time kissing you and you didn't mind.

Feeling the lift come to a stop, Kylo lifted his lips away from your own before he stood straight, allowing you to walk out first before him. Keeping his hand on your back as he walked you, he couldn't help but grow closer. Wrapping his arm around your waist and bring you to him, you smiled to yourself as your heart fluttered.

Approaching your living quarters, Kylo came to a stop before you, hands holding your own in his as he pressed kisses against your knuckles. "Thank you for joining me tonight."

"I hope we do it again." You nodded with a smile, causing Kylo to grin.

"Of course. Anything for you, my darling." Pulling you to him as he leaned forward, he left one last kiss against your lips before he had let go of you.

Just about to enter your chambers, you turned and eyed Kylo. "Why don't you come in?" You nudged your head, Kylo's eyes brightening up.

"If you don't mind..."

"I don't." You chuckled, grabbing his hand and tugging him into your room. "As long as you stay the night."


	15. Eager

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request:
> 
> Idk if anything like this has been done but, Kylo asking someone out and they say no but later he asks them out disguised as Matt and they say yes.

The deep, open space consumed you as distant stars and the vast darkness surrounded you. Flying in your prized starfighter, leading your squadron, you sucked in a small breath. Yet another mission to a distant plant in the outer reaches of the galaxy. But, you weren't complaining, you enjoyed being a TIE pilot.

"Alright, let's head home." You spoke into the com, leading your team back to the Supremacy. It had been a few days since you left, your mission lasting longer than expected; but this happened often and you were accustomed.

Jumping into hyper-speed, seeing the streaks of light zoom past you, you and your crew saw the large vessel in the distance, flying towards it.

Although you did enjoy what your job entitled, you also very much hated the fact that you'd go days without having a good meal or nights rest. The one thing you looked forward to at the end of each mission... aside victory. You've never allowed you or your team to fail the Order. Not once.

Possibly why your crew was always praised and admired. Although some liked to belittle you out of spite, you knew it was pure jealousy and you never allowed it to get the best of you.

Entering the hangar and landing your TIE, you hopped out before removing your helmet, taking in the strong air that was filled with the metals and gas from the surrounding ships. "Home sweet home." You teased.

"Excellent job, Lieutenant." One of your teammates patted your shoulder before saluting. "Get some rest in you, you deserve it."

"Thank you." Nodding your head once, you stuffed your helmet under your arm and walked off, first aiming for your quarters to shower up and change.

Standing at one of the upper levels the hangar had, the man cladded in all black with his _graceful_ cape sucked in a breath as he watched you walk away. No, he wasn't stalking you, nor did he purposefully wait for your return and made sure to be there the moment you arrived... he just so happened to be there at the right time.

Rolling his eyes at his own pettiness over something as ridiculous as a quote unquote _crush_ , Kylo turned and walked away. Ever since he had taken the title of Supreme Leader for himself, he found more... confidence. And a lot more will power. As well as his lack for caring—at least, lack of caring what people thought.

Plenty crew members noticed their Supreme Leader always at the hangar, and he knew they noticed. He just didn't care to explain himself when he didn't have to. He didn't even bother looking their way, he just kept his eyes focused on one thing and that was you.

You, however, never seemed to notice this. Not when your motives were to go straight to your chambers or the dinning hall. But, it wasn't like you hadn't known the man—let alone, spoken to him. You had gone on a few missions with him, him taking the very best pilots with him as he lead the way with his TIE Silencer. A ship you were very much fascinated in... A ship that Kylo wouldn't mind letting you fly with him one day if you had paid him any mind.

Something you hardly did when he was your superior and you were a busy person. Especially when he was the Supreme Leader. You weren't about to cross paths with him unless you had to, he was the highest ranking man in the entire organization; let alone, you knew about him, his abilities and... well, his reputation.

But, his reputation wasn't as important as his title.

Showering and changing, you made your way to the dining hall where you were greeted by your fellow team—amongst other officers, troopers and pilots. Spending the evening eating and conversing with the group that you sat with, exchanging stories and talking about future missions, you had finished your meal and decided it was time to retire for the night.

"Goodnight." You waved to the group, tossing the contents of your tray before leaving the dining hall.

Turning the corner and rolling your shoulders, ready to be consumed by the sheets of your bed, and the mattress itself, you aimed for your living quarters.

Walking down the halls, opening and closing his palms, Kylo took in a deep breath as he followed your Force and searched for you. It had been quite some time, and he had stalled enough, that he finally pushed himself to confronting you. Although he had gained confidence, he was still a bit hesitant when it came to his so called love life.

Turning another corner, your pace slowed as your eyes landed on the person who had rounded the opposite corner. "Supreme Leader, sir." You bowed your head but Kylo lifted a hand, dismissing the formalities.

"No need for formalities, Y/N." He said as you nodded. "Are you busy at the moment?"

"No, I was headed to my chambers to retire for the night." You answered, shaking your head.

"This won't take much of your time." Kylo said as your eyebrows lightly narrowed.

"Oh, what is it?" You asked, Kylo taking a few steps forward and stopping before you.

Swallowing, Kylo cleared his throat, looking you in the eyes. "Would you like to go out with me? Dinner, at least?"

Feeling your heart skip a beat as your lips parted, you sealed them as you gulped. You knew there was no way you could date or be seen with the Supreme Leader. He was practically your boss. You couldn't date your boss... It was wrong on so many levels. Even if he was a good looking man who very much treated you with the upmost respect.

"I... I don't think I can." You breathed, seeing his shoulders drop. "I'm sorry, Kylo... But, you are the Supreme Leader and I'm a Lieutenant..."

"I understand." He bowed his head before stepping away from blocking your path. "Sleep well, Y/N."

Looking up at him for a moment, biting your inner lip, you nodded once. "Thank you." With a faint smile, you walked away.

Watching you walk away, Kylo cursed under his breath. He thought it would be easier to have you, to make you his, after gaining such a high title... Not prevent him.

Clenching his fists as he turned away, an idea suddenly came to mind. If you couldn't date him because he was of a higher level than you, then he'd find his way to be beneath you.

. . .

"Are we up for our test run on the starfighters?" One of your pilots asked as you had entered the hangar.

"We should be. After our mission, I think it's best to check them out and make sure they're ready for our next one that's in a few days." You answered, walking alongside them.

"Lieutenant, there seems to be a problem with your TIE Fighter." Another pilot rushed up to you as your eyebrows narrowed. "A technician was sent in to check on it, they said it may take a few days to repair."

"What? Seriously? How... It was fine?" You narrowed your eyebrows.

"Don't worry, it tends to happen from time to time, especially when they're used constantly." The pilot assured. "If anything, we can save our test run for when your ship is set?"

"No, no... Go without me, I rather you guys be prepared than not." You nodded. "I'll go check up on the ship."

"Okay, Lieutenant." With a nod of their heads, they walked away.

Sucking in a breath, you turned on your heel and aimed for where your TIE Fighter had been sat, seeing someone emerge from it, a head of blond hair and a bright orange vest catching your attention as your eyebrows furrowed. "Excuse me... You must be the technician?" You asked, catching their attention as they turned. They almost seemed as if you had caught them doing something they shouldn't.

"Uh, yes." He nodded, you tilting your head the slightest at the sight of their big, silver rimmed glasses. "Matt." He introduced, sticking his hand out as you grabbed on.

"Y/N." You shook his hand. "What seems to be the problem?"

"Oh, the ship just needs a routine check up. A few changes here and there, minor repairs. Should take a day or two." He nodded, pursing his lips.

"Oh, good, I thought something bad happened." You sighed in relief.

"No- no, you're all good. The ship is fine." Matt said. "You take good care of it."

"I try to." You shrugged. "It is my baby." You laughed

"It's in the best shape, especially for how long it's been around."

"It's had its incidents, but it's stuck around." You nodded with a smile, Matt looking at you with a faint smile, almost gazing at you. "It's a prized possession."

"Ah, I can imagine. TIE Fighters are wonderful spacecrafts." Matt said, snapping out of his trance, nodding his head and eyeing the ship. "Exactly why we have to constantly check up on and maintain them."

"Yes of course." You breathed, looking at your ship, then at him, not realizing how tall he was. "Well, I'll let you be... I was supposed to do test runs but I guess I can save that for another time."

"Sorry about that..."

"It's okay, no worries, just get my baby all fixed and nice." You smiled at Matt before turning and walking away. "I'll come every now and then to check up on the progress, don't destroy it!" You spoke over your shoulder as he sucked in a breath, nodding.

Lucky for Matt—well, _Kylo_ —he knew his way around ships. Especially TIE Fighters. "This better fuckin' work." He huffed, turning back to work on your ship. He had to get you somehow.

. . .

Busying yourself with a few mission reports you had to review—something you weren't so fond of with how long they took and how bothersome it was to input them—you took a break to get some coffee in your system. It was reaching the end of the day and you had visited the technician (Matt) and your beloved ship a good three times. Although you weren't one to take many breaks, you were doing reports and that was your least favorite thing to do... So, of course, you took multiple breaks as an excuse to give your mind a break.

Getting a cup of coffee as you took a few sips, you made your way over to the hangar to see the familiar blond at work. You wondered if he ever took breaks, it had been hours and every time you went to see your ship, he was there working.

"Do you ever take breaks?" You asked, leaning forwards as Matt had been sat before the TIE Fighter, then taking a sip of your coffee.

Looking over his shoulder as he recognized your voice, you gave him a kind smile as he sucked in a small breath. "Yeah... Uh, I take them every now and then." He said, scratching his head with the wrench in his hold as you tilted your head.

"Really? Because every time I come around, you're always here." Taking another sip, you lifted your focus up to your ship, Kylo— _Matt_ _—_ keeping his eyes on you, eyeing your face.

"Yeah, well... I'm trying to get this done in time for you." He truthfully spoke, your eyes trailing back down to meet with his. "I can tell you really enjoy what you do... And I wouldn't want to hold you back any longer than I have to."

Smiling, you nodded. "I appreciate it, thank you."

"It's no problem." He said, looking you in the eyes before looking away, you noticing the gaze. Biting your inner lip, you stood up straight. "I should be done by the end of the day... Well, a couple of hours."

"Okay." You softly spoke, taking your last few sips of your coffee. "Thank you Matt, I'll see you in a few hours."

Nodding, he looked over his shoulder and watched you walk away as he took in a deep breath. He was growing impatient, even though it hadn't even been a day.

Returning to your post and finishing up the reports, the hours had passed and you 'clocked' out for the day, going to the hangar for the last time in the day. In all honesty, you were finding yourself visiting the hangar more for the fact of seeing Matt... rather than seeing your own ship. You had to admit, he was cute, a unique kind of beauty and he seemed sweet and... friendly. At least, from the few times you've spoken to him.

"Wow, nice." You spoke up. "Did you make my ship... shinier?" You asked, Matt standing up and wiping his hands.

"Uh, yeah... I've finished up and decided to clean it up a bit." He nodded. Truth be told, he was just being extra nice and to get on your good side if he hadn't already. He knew he was being over the top but he was doing anything at this point. "Looks good as new, huh?"

"Yeah, yeah." You nodded with a smile. "Thank you, Matt." Walking over to the ship and seeing your reflection so easily, you saw Matt approach you from behind.

"Y/N..." Turning and seeing how close Matt was, your heart leapt.

"Yeah?"

"Are you... I know this is way too soon, but are you busy now?" He asked, rubbing the back of his neck, your eyebrows raising.

"Oh, no, I just retired for the day." You said as he sucked in a breath.

"Would you like to go to... dinner with me? Right now?" Matt asked as you sweetly smiled.

"Uh, yeah! Sure." You nodded as his eyes widened.

"SERIOUSLY?!" He shouted in disbelief. You'd go on a date with Matt but not Kylo? Seeing you flinch, he apologized. "Sorry... Uh-" Clearing his throat, he swallowed. "Sorry..."

"It's okay." You laughed. "I'm hungry, we should go now." You nudged your head.

"Yeah." Nodding, he took in a small breath before walking alongside you. "Yeah..."


	16. Secrecy (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request:
> 
> Hey I love ur writing so much!! Can I please request something where reader is the queen of a planet that is in business with the first order, there's heaps of sexual tension and bargaining and stuff and she accidentally reveals she's force sensitive by reading Hux's mind or something and kylo is impressed that she was able to hide it from him without him sensing it ?? Smut maybe but more like saucy flirting n teasing n stuff thanks so much hope you decide to write this shitty prompt <3<3<3

Standing at the main balcony of your palace, overlooking the heart of your home planet—the city you lived in—you took in a small breath. The fresh air filled your lungs, the cool weather patting at your face as you held onto the railing. Hearing the sounds of nature mixed with the distant sounds of the people working within the castle, your eyes trailed up to the pale blue sky.

Emerging from the puffy white clouds was a ship, an all black one, its form becoming familiar to you the closer it had become. You knew those long wings, especially the way they lifted when the vessel had landed.

Letting out a breath with a faint grin on your lips, you turned away and entered the palace.

News had spread throughout the galaxy that there had been a change in the First Order—and seeing as you did business with them—you had to see it for yourself. The one who took the title of Supreme Leader.

Walking down the steps and treading towards the main hall, a pair of guards followed you outside as you greeted your guests. A group of four: a pair of stormtroopers, the General and... the new Supreme Leader.

Coming to a stop as you took a slight lean to the left, over to one of your guards, you mumbled, "So the Commander has taken the title of Supreme Leader..." Smirking as you kept your eyes on the man approaching you, you stood straight.

"So it seems, my queen." The guard responded as you nodded.

"Hmph... Interesting." Holding your hands together in front of you, fidgeting with the golden rings on your fingers, the group of four came to a stop.

"Queen Y/L/N." The General— _Hux_ —bowed. "It seems as if-"

Lifting a gloved hand and interrupting Hux, the Supreme Leader step forward. "Pardon my insufferable General, my queen. That is no way to greet you." Feeling Hux's eyes burn on the back of his head, the man reached out for your hand and kissed your knuckles ever so gently; the uncontrollable heat ran up to your cheeks from the softness of his lips.

"Thank you, Ren." You smiled with a small bow of your head. "Word has been spread that there is a new Supreme Leader..." Seeing Kylo stand up straight, he slowly let go of your hand. "I take it that you have taken the throne as your own?"

Looking down at you, he nodded, a faint grin on his lips as if he were prouder than ever. "You will have to deal with me now."

Biting your inner lip, you had nearly forgotten there were others surrounding the two of you. "That is of no bother, I've dealt with you plenty before." You winked, one that only Kylo saw, his large frame nearly blocking the others behind him from seeing it.

"It is an honor to continuously work with you, business partners... Allies..." He trailed as you quietly swallowed.

"Of course." You nodded. "Speaking of which, I believe we have some negotiations to discuss." You nudged your head as he nodded, you turning to lead the rest as Kylo trailed shortly behind you.

Watching either of you from behind, the way Kylo walked extra closely, Hux rolled his eyes. He didn't know how much longer he'd last dealing with Kylo's reign, it was like living in a nightmare. One he couldn't wake up from—as if he were trapped.

And it was only getting more and more difficult to deal with by the second.

_Insufferable? The only insufferable one here is Ren. His ruling will lead to his undoing and I am just counting the days before he fails miserably and I get to take the throne... Maybe even the queen, herself, she wouldn't be a bad addition to my life..._

Narrowing your eyebrows at the involuntary thoughts that filled your mind—as if Hux had been speaking them to you—you looked over your shoulder at him and arched an eyebrow. He surely lacked respect for either you and the Supreme Leader.

Nearly hiccuping at the look you had given him, Hux cleared his throat before crossing his arms behind him, shifting his eyes up to the palace and acting as if he hadn't seen your expression. Pure coincidence that you looked at him with such annoyance after his thoughts came to a stop.

Following your glare, Kylo turned his focus that was now on an unaware Hux, over to an irritated you.

Of course, Kylo had heard Hux's thoughts and chose not to act on his desire to choke the man out or make him trip up the steps, he just wondered if you had, too... _Impossible_.

Entering the palace and aiming for the throne room, you took your seat and began discussing the few matters at hand. Bargaining, negotiations, trade... The alliance between your planet and the First Order. Hux had taken over majority of the conversation at first, irritating you once again. He wasn't the ruler, he was just the _General_. You wanted to hear from the Supreme.

And Kylo knew this very well. Possibly why he kept his eyes on you most of the time and why your gaze always found its way to him. You even asked him more questions and spoke to him instead of Hux, in response.

"We shall take a half hour break." You ordered, dismissing everyone before you stood, Kylo staying behind. "You have a... special General."

"Special is a very kind word to use." Kylo spoke, you coming to a stop beside him. "I'd like to say he's intolerable... A nuisance... Aggravating. The list goes on. He tries doing my job and I have to constantly remind him of where his duties lie."

Looking up at Kylo, you sighed. "A shame... I was hoping to hear more of the Supreme Leader's convincing and confident voice."

Taking a small breath and looking you in the eye, Kylo grinned. "I'm sure you will... Doesn't have to be during negotiations either. I have an inkling that we will be speaking and... seeing each other more. One on one."

"Mhm..." You hummed. "Although, I _know_ it'll happen." Turning away from him and walking off, he watched you as you had, eyes trailing your body. There was clear history between the two of you.

Taking your break within the botanical guardians of your palace's grounds, you breathed in the fresh air to clear your mind. Negotiations always got the most out of you—you always felt exhausted, especially when they lasted hours on end.

Hearing the crickets chirp and the sounds of the waterfall streaming through the small river beneath you, as you stood on the bridge, your lifted your head from eyeing the water flow. Outstretching your arms on the railing, you patted one side before looking over your shoulder. "You followed."

"You knew..." Kylo spoke, skeptical. He was sure he was stealthy enough not to be heard.

"I felt as if I were being watched." You lied, but Kylo didn't buy it. Narrowing his eyes as he studied you, he came to a stop beside you as you looked over. "Yes?"

"Unbelievable..." He nearly whispered, eyes squinting as he eyed you. "You sensed me just now... And you heard Hux's thoughts earlier."

"Excuse me?" You lifted a brow, trying to keep your composure... But then Kylo leaned closer to you, enough that you felt his breathing on your cheek.

"I'm impressed..." He smirked.

"Why's that?" You placed a hand on your hip.

"You're Force sensitive... and you were able to hide it for so long. Years... I never felt a thing." His voice lowered, searching your eyes. "You never cease to amaze me, my queen." Kylo grinned as you sucked in a breath.

"I wasn't going to let anyone know... Not when the previous Supreme Leader would've done anything to have me under his guidance." You scoffed, looking back at the river as Kylo loomed.

"You have no worries with me... I'm just fascinated that you are sensitive to the Force. A queen with such greatness within her." He leaned and nearly whispered into your ear, placing a hand on the small of your back. "Impressive."

Swallowing, you turned your head and looked Kylo in the eyes. "I'm sure this very much amazes you, hmm?"

"Of course it does." He grinned. "You are an overflowing soul filled with talent and grace. Why wouldn't I be? You are a wonder, dear Y/N."

Shaking your head, you grinned. "You're trying to sweet talk me."

"If that were so, I would've made it more clear of what I wanted with all this bargaining... But I'm sure you know what I _really_ want." He grinned, face inches from yours now.

"I do?" You lifted a brow, voice becoming faint. "I don't know... With the new title, I'm sure you think you can get whatever you want, huh?"

"My sweet, I got whatever I wanted, even before I was the Supreme." He grinned as you sucked in a small breath. "With you, that is."

"Well, you didn't get it so easy, hotshot." You winked, patting his chest.  "It was a give and take. What are you willing to give?"

"Oh, I am sure you know what I'm willing to give." Kylo grinned, licking his lips as you bit your tongue. "Anything to satisfy the queen in ways no one else can, of course."

Thinking about your past interactions with him, you felt your heart rate picking up as you sucked in a breath. Pressing your hand against his jaw, you sealed the gap between the two of you, knowing where it had been going.

Smiling into the kiss, Kylo instantly reciprocated it, parting your lips with his tongue as your heart fluttered. Pressing his hands against your back before wrapping an arm to bring you closer, he moved his other hand to the back of your head as he lifted you from the ground.

You hadn't realized how much time had passed you by, kissing Kylo to the point you couldn't feel your lips, and enough where you were sure your face was attached to his.

"We should go back..." You breathed, separating as Kylo lowered you.

"Mhm." He nodded, pressing one last kiss against your lips, hard enough to make you lean back. "Maybe this whole ordeal needs more than just one day to discuss it..." Kylo said, wiping your smudged lipstick away as you did with the remnants that were smeared onto his own face.

"Yeah... A day or two..." You grinned.

"You should go ahead so I can be late. Gives you a reason to chew me out." He winked as you rolled your eyes.

"Of course..." Fixing yourself so you didn't look the least bit disheveled, you walked off, Kylo watching you before you disappeared from his sight.

As more hours had passed, you declared that you'd continue the negotiations the following day, giving Kylo what he wanted and even giving the group places to stay if they chose to. Kylo, of course, took the offer.

But, instead of being in his own room, he found his way into yours.

"Kylo..." You said, opening the door to your room as he stood there, a mischievous grin on his lips. "You would catch me as I'm changing." Getting a hold of you and shutting the door behind him as he lifted you in his arms, you caved in. Wrapping your arms over his shoulder, you smiled down at him.

"What a lovely robe you have on..." He spoke, eyeing the silk material that was silver, tied loosely around your body, exposing a decent amount of your chest—especially with all the shifting, being in Kylo's arms. "Although I'm sure it'll look much lovelier on the floor." He teased as you shook your head.

"You have far better lines than that. You must." You said, kissing his jaw. "Like... for me... I'd love to feel you up." Lifting your bare legs and wrapping them around his waist, you winked. "Every inch."

"Every inch, huh?" Seeing you nod your head, Kylo moved a hand to the back of your neck, bringing your lips close to his before he whispered, "Love, I don't think you can handle all of it."

Rolling your eyes, you kissed him just as he kissed you. "Don't underestimate me, Ren. I like a challenge. Especially when it's coming from the one person who claims they're the only one who can satisfy me." You breathed. "I want to be satisfied, Ren. It's been too long..."

Sucking in a breath, Kylo's lips curved upwards. "Someone seems desperate..."

"I am so not." You shook your head. "You said you could satisfy me, and I'm waiting to be satisfied."

Lowering you, Kylo's hands moved to your robe, fingertips brushing against the sleeves of the robe, the silk material running smoothly. "Well... this is a give and take..." Moving his hands up to the collar of the robe, trailing his hands down and lightly opening it up, he stopped them at the knot of the ribbon. "What will you give me?"

Lifting your eyebrows, looking up at Kylo and away from his hands, you crossed your arms, "Kylo..." Seeing his eyes trail up to your breasts, he grinned.

"Fair enough." He muttered, leaning forward and kissing your cheek, down your jaw and neck, to your chest. Unfolding your arms, he loosened the knot enough, grabbing your hips and kissing your breasts as you took in a breath. "I suggest you try and stay quiet this time around, I'm sure you don't want your people thinking their queen is having an affair of some sort." Kylo muttered against your chest as you sighed.

"Me? You are just as bad, Ren." Pushing him back, your hands moved up to his shoulders and shoved off his cape. "You can't control your mouth, you're very vulgar and very loud." Removing his belt as he watched you, he got a hold of your wrists.

"Yet, you enjoy it." He winked, leaning towards you with a devious grin, kissing your lips as he pulled you to him.

"I do not." You mumbled against his lips, kissing them multiple times.

"Oh, you very much do. You encourage it and you even have a dirty mouth yourself-"

"I do not!" You pushed back with a gasp, Kylo grinning once again. He knew he was right... and you knew it to. "I am a queen and I have a _clean_ mouth."

Letting go of your wrists, Kylo crossed his arms. "Clean?" He arched an eyebrow. "Your mouth is nowhere near clean when I'm around. You very well know that. Especially with what that pretty little mouth of yours does to my-"

Smacking his gloved fingers away from your lips as he had moved them onto them, you glared. "How dare you, my mouth is not-"

"Oh, relax, no one will know their queen enjoys giving head." He smirked as you rolled your eyes, just about ready to take and not give him anything.

"I'm _this_ close from making you give me head and then kick you out of my room." You glared with your hands on your hips.

Pouting, he grabbed your cheeks. "Now, that's not fair."

"I think it's very much fair. I am a _queen_." You shrugged as he dropped his hands, one holding your chin.

"And I am the _Supreme Leader_ of the First Order." He smiled sarcastically, causing your lips to pout. "I think that's higher than being a queen."

"Why don't you drop the ego and stop stalling." You said, lowering his hand as you moved it onto the knot.

"Me? Stalling? I'm sure by now this robe would be on the floor and we'd be on that bed with you beneath me." He pointed, you rolling your eyes with a sigh, untying the robe and dropping it. "And I'd have you-" Looking back over at you, seeing your bare body, he shut his mouth, lips forming into its natural pout.

"You're stalling, Ren." You huffed. Clenching his jaw, feeling his body burn up, he stripped out of his clothes and peeled his gloves off before pulling your body to his. Crashing his lips against yours as his hands roamed your body, feeling the smoothness of your skin against his palms as your hands slid up his neck and into his hair.

Gliding his hands down your back, one arm wrapped around your waist and pressed your bare chest against his as his free hand buried within your hair, fingers knotting around it as you moaned into his mouth.

Bringing you over to your bed, lips never parting, the two of you became a touching mess as you felt each other up. Your hands roaming his body as his did to yours, moans filling the air as you rolled around.

Wrapping your leg around his as you lied partially underneath him, Kylo held your face as his lips moved against yours, your hands on his back. Hearing a sudden knock on your door, you turned your head away from Kylo's and looked at the door, placing a finger on his lips. "My queen?"

"Yes?" You called out, feeling Kylo's hand move down to your ribs as you instantly gave him a look, shaking your head as he grinned.

"The General of the First Order is looking for their Supreme Leader, is there any chance that you know where the man is?" They asked, Kylo digging his fingers into your skin as you shrieked, smacking his arm. "Are you alright?"

"Sorry, there was a bug... on me." You glared at Kylo as his eyes narrowed. "But, no. Have you checked the rooms I offered them?"

"Yes... He is nowhere to be found."

"Check the botanical garden, I've seen him there a few times." You said as Kylo moved his hand back to your cheek as he kissed your neck.

"Thank you, my queen."

Letting out a breath as you heard them walk away, you looked at Kylo and shoved him back, moving on top of him. "What is wrong with you? I could easily kick you out so your General can find you."

"I rather you not." He said before getting a hold of your waist and pushing you down underneath him. Kissing down your chest and stomach, over to your thigh and inner thigh, you sat up on your elbows as you looked at him. "Hmm..." Kissing deeper into your thigh, he lifted his eyes to meet yours before smirking.

"Kylo..." You sighed.

"What?" Lifting himself up, he crawled on top of you as you glared. "Oh, sorry... Did you think I was going to give you head?"

Rolling your eyes, you got a hold of his hair and pulled his face to yours. "You're a real dick."

"Oh, sweetheart, you don't know what a real dick is." He grinned, leaning forward and giving you a soft kiss as you groaned.

"I don't?" You asked as he shook his head. "I'm sure I do... But why don't you remind me?"

"I would love to." Kissing your chin, he reached for your left leg and wrapped it around his waist, teasing your entrance as your breath hitched. "But, you've got to beg for it."

Glaring up at him as he smirked, you lowered your hand and grabbed his length as he yelped. "Why don't _you_?"

"Sh-it... I ha- hate when you do... that." He stuttered, heart racing.

"I know." Kissing his neck, Kylo positioned himself and entered you, the feeling making either of you suck in a breath as you wrapped your other leg around him, biting your bottom lip.

"Ah.... Fuck..." He breathed, before he thrusted.

The two of you became a moaning and cursing mess, Kylo's hips bucking into your own as the two of you got tangled in the sheets. You had pulled him down beside you as his face buried into your neck, muffling his cursing. Then he rolled onto his back and pulled you on top of him, your hands pressing against his chest as you bit your bottom lip, bouncing.

"Fuck, yes, shit!" He cursed, your hand moving to cover his mouth.

"Sh-sh!" You hushed, panting and swallowing, head now hanging as you picked up your pace. "Ugh!" You groaned.

"Fuck, baby, just like that!" Kylo shouted into your hand as you muffled him, his hands moving to your ass as he gave you a small spank. "Stars... You feel so fucking good... So- so fucking good, shit..." He grumbled, your hand falling to his shoulder.

"K- Kylo, shh..." You breathed, Kylo sitting up as your hands moved into his hair as his lips moved to your shoulder, licking and nipping the skin, marking it.

Panting against one another as Kylo moved you down onto the bed and wrapped his arm around the back of your knee, lifting your leg higher to reach deeper, you felt yourself lose your breath. "Shit, Kylo!" You yelled, biting your tongue as he practically rammed his hips into you, hitting the right spot and making you squeeze your eyes shut.

"Feels fucking good doesn't it?" He spoke into your neck. "The way I'm fucking you in ways no one else can... I'm sure all your suitors wish... they could feel your tightness... huh?" He grinned as you bit down, your hands roaming through and tugging at his hair. The bed was nearly slamming into the wall; to your amazement, especially with how massive your bed was, Kylo's strength made it shift. He was going at it faster and harder than before and you knew you were going to curse him out the very next day.

Feeling your body breaking into a sweat with the heat that moved about your skin, your lips parting as you let out loud moans, you felt yourself climaxing. "Kylo..." You moaned as you came, Kylo leaving wet kisses against your neck, pace faltering.

Lifting his head and looking down at you, he grinned before pressing his forehead against yours. "Stars, you're so fucking beautiful."

Lowering your hands onto his jawline, you tilted your head and kissed him as he came. "You're nice when you get what you want."

"I'm only nice to _you_." He corrected as he pulled out, falling to his side and holding you, his hand in your hair as he brought your face close to his, softly kissing you.

Scooting closer to him, kissing him back, you then looked at him. "How long do you think this'll last?"

"What? Sleeping around?" He asked as you nodded. "As long as you don't fall for anyone else." Kylo said as he moved onto his back, wrapping an arm around your waist as you rested on his chest.

"Fall? Who said I've fallen for you?" You asked, lifting yourself enough to look at him, Kylo folding his free arm behind his head as he smirked.

"I know you have."

"I have not." You scoffed, cheeks burning.

Looking over at you, he grinned, lifting himself against the headboard and pulling you to him so that you were eye to eye, you swallowed. "You have."

"I... have not." You mumbled, eyes unintentionally trailing around his face.

"I'll admit, I do feel something for you..."

"Yeah? Let me guess, arousal? Lust?" You arched an eyebrow as you looked him back in the eyes.

"Oh, of course, but, not just that." He smiled.

"Hmph..."

"I am... In love with you-"

"Ugh, you're such a fool, Ren." You rolled your eyes, about to peel yourself from him but he pulled you back.

"I do like you, my queen." He truthfully spoke this time, you letting out a small sigh as he looked you in the eyes. "And I know you feel the same."

Staring at him as your heart skipped a beat, you bit your bottom lip, then looked away. "Possibly..."

"You're stubborn." Kylo shook his head, although smiling.

Looking back at him, you held his chin and kissed him. "Oh, hush. How could I possibly _like_ the Supreme Leader, my business partner and a very busy man?" You asked with a tilt of your head.

"You make time." With a wink, Kylo pulled the sheets over the two of you.

Lying down beside him, Kylo turned you and held you to his chest as you sighed. "I'll see what I can do."


	17. Infatuated and Mistaken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request:
> 
> Hi lovely! Congrats on the 6k, you deserve it - you're a wonderful and kindhearted person! I was hoping to request something based on a cute prompt I saw; Kylo is completely smitten with the reader (a high ranking officer) but he misinterprets it as a rivalry because he never felt this way about anyone before, Reader is oblivious to this "rivalry" and always goes out of her way to be sweet to Kylo which inevitably makes him flustered every time. Thank you sweetheart! xx

"Who is she?" Kylo asked Phasma as he stood beside her, the two standing on the bridge of their new base, much like Starkiller but with a lot more advancements and—of course—security. Being the new Supreme Leader, Kylo made sure the past did not repeat itself. He did not want to lose the new base, nor did he want a Death Star 2.0 dilemma in which their base was destroyed before even finished. But, with his luck, it wasn't.

"Who is who, Supreme Leader?" Phasma asked as she looked over at Kylo, seeing his eyes directly focused on something... Someone.

" _Her_." He firmly spoke, eyes fixated on a young woman who had been standing amongst the sitting officers, busied with her duties. "Who is she." Kylo demanded rather than questioned.

The curisotiy her superior was feeling only made her smile from within her helmet, not once seeing this side of him before. Kylo Ren didn't normally pay attention to any of his inferiors unless he had to... But the officer that was standing there before him, speaking to an officer that had been sat at their post, Kylo's eyes hadn't left her figure once. "That is Colonel Y/L/N. Recently transferred to the base as per requested by, the General, himself." Phasma informed as Kylo gave a slow nod, eyebrows narrowed and practically glaring at you. "Quite an eye pleaser, huh?" Phasma teased as Kylo's shoulders tensed up.

"Eye pleaser?" He questioned with narrowed brows and a tight jaw. "No, I don't like her." Kylo admitted as Phasma's covered smirk dropped.

"You don't even know the young woman, sir?" Phasma shook her head, looking back over at Kylo.

"I don't have to know her to like her." Kylo defended as his stare turned back into a glare, watching you move around from officer to officer, a faint smile on your lips. "Why is she smiling?"

"Some people are actually happy with their lives." Phasma lowly scoffed as Kylo's head snapped her way, eyes narrowing. "Not everyone is brooding like you, sir." At that, Phasma walked away and went up to you.

Feeling his eye twitch as he watched Phasma so casually approach you and speak to you, something she hardly did with anyone else—even Kylo himself—his fists clenched at his sides. The way you smiled, how you seemed so... kind. You weren't meant for the First Order, how was it that you were a Colonel? Let alone, how could Hux promote you when you were too... nice? "Crowd pleaser." He growled underneath his breath before storming off, not wanting to watch the interaction any longer.

Ever since your move to the new base, you found yourself much more happier. Although you didn't mind being out in the open space, surrounded by nothing but stars, you sort of preferred actually having a real time frame than some fake, set up one, where there was no sun or any moons to tell you what time of day it was. It really screwed with your body clock and was hard to adjust when you first joined the Order.

But now, you were positioned mainly on the bridge that had a great view that wasn't just open space and your subordinates were tolerable. It wasn't like they never were, they usually were too busy or too afraid to even step out of line—especially when Hux was around. Unlike Hux—or nearly any other upper ranking officers there was—the officers preferred having you around. You were a very... positive force amongst everyone. And, unlike the rest, you tried keeping your life that way. Just because you worked with the First Order did not mean you had to be brooding like the rest.

Then, there was Kylo. He couldn't seem to understand you and it was getting under his skin. _You_ were getting under his skin. For a reason unbeknownst to him, you were on the back of his mind when you shouldn't have been. Every time he saw you, there was always something new that he didn't like about you. Whether it was your smile or hair, the way you carried yourself, your figure or even your hands—in which he somehow always found himself comparing to his own—he grew far more irritated. What was so special about you that his mind was so hung up about it? And why did everyone seem to like you? _He_ was the Supreme Leader, _he_ was supposed to be the one getting all the attention, _not_ you.

"I think you are overthinking this, Supreme Leader." Hux spoke as he held in a laugh. Kylo was going overboard, coming with up with excuses and terrible reasons why you should be demoted and sent elsewhere. "Colonel Y/L/N is one of the finest officers we have. Just because she seems a bit too nice does not mean she isn't doing her job well. If anything, her kindness is a plus to her, her subordinates actually get things done under her supervision."

"That's outrageous, they should feel fear from their higher ups, not adoration!" Kylo exclaimed as Hux bit down, not wanting to laugh in the Supreme Leader's face—although he really wanted to. "Fear is what makes them work faster and harder."

"Adoration is making them work better and less sloppy. Things are working out far better under her watch than it was with the previous Colonel." Hux shrugged as Kylo's jaw tightened, nose flaring. He couldn't believe that everyone, including Hux, was defending you. "Why are you so worked up about this, may I ask? Is it because she's beautiful?" Hux teased as Kylo's eyes widened.

"NO!" He shouted before storming off, leaving Hux standing there with a wide grin, knowing very well that what the Supreme Leader had was not envy—rather—a _crush_.

"This is absolutely pathetic. Unbelievable." He spoke to himself, stomping down the halls with tight fists and a scowl. His mind was running all over the place, instead of worrying about more important matters like the Resistance or even the men that worked around him, he was stuck on you. And only you. "Fuck!" He shouted as nearby stormtroopers and officers scurried off, knowing very well that their Supreme Leader still had that temper within him.

Comming off of a small break and making your way back to the bridge, you turned a corner and saw the Supreme Leader—Kylo Ren—walking down the hall. "Good afternoon, Supreme Leader." you greeted with a bow of your head, Kylo looking up and narrowing his eyes, looking at you with such disgust as you smiled at him.

"Why are you so _happy_?" He seethed as you shook your head.

"No reason... Just, lightening the mood like I always do." You said as you took in a deep breath, Kylo's glare growing stronger as you still had your smile—a smile that was making his heart race faster than it did when he was angry.

"Ugh!" He scoffed before rushing off, you turning and watching, brushing it off as you returned to your post.

Taking in deep breaths, huffing and rubbing his chest as his heart had been beating roughly against it, Kylo's anger intensified. All you had to do was smile at him and that made his head want to explode from the heat rushing up to it.

His skin felt as if it was on fire and he was feeling uncomfortable. His stomach flipped and something was caught in his throat. The sensation that moved through his veins and all throughout his body made the lights flicker around him as his Force almost felt out of his control. If he couldn't get you demoted, then, he'd have to stay far away from you as possible.

Which, as he feared, was impossible. Everywhere he went, you were there. And, if you weren't there, you were in his mind. He could feel you in the Force, as if it was taunting him, reminding him of what exactly got him riled up; what was missing around him.

And it was only growing worse as the days had passed. It was almost as if you were doing it on purpose to upset him. Always greeting him, flashing a smile, bowing your head... And with respect. Were you mocking him and his power? Were you trying to belittle him... Were you trying to gain his _title_?

Gritting his teeth as he saw you down the hall he was walking through, speaking to Phasma and Hux, Kylo trudged over with heavy breaths. His cheeks were burning and he felt as if he was about to be lightheaded. He had never despised anyone so much in his life. Well, almost. There was his uncle and then there was Snoke... And Hux. But you, you were his ultimate rival.

"I couldn't agree more." You spoke up to the two that nearly towered you. "I was thinking that-"

"What is this?!" Kylo spat as you, Phasma, and Hux all looked over at him.

"Here we go..." Hux rolled his eyes, already knowing what was going to happen—and the same went for Phasma. As for you, you were completely oblivious. To you, Kylo was just being his normal self. Not a man who had been so fascinated in you that he thought it was a rivalry.

"What are you three scheming?!" Kylo seethed as your eyebrows narrowed. "I know- I know you want to take my title!" He pointed a finger at you as you shook your head. "And you two are trying to help her!"

"Oh, stars... Ren, please. This young woman is not trying to take the Supreme Leader title from you. If anything, that would be Hux." Phasma said as Hux scoffed.

"I would not! And if I were, I would be less obvious than just being nice to the man _solely_ because someone is nice." Hux said as he leaned his head towards you, Kylo's eyebrows deeply furrowing as he was hunched forward.

"I'm sorry... Am I missing something?" You questioned as you eyed both Hux and Phasma, Kylo's eyes screwing back as he was bout to open his mouth, only for Phasma to beat him to it.

"No, you're not. The one who is missing something is the Supreme Leader." She said. "You see, he is heavily infatuated in you. He's always staring at and watch you from afar because he thinks you're some sort of threat to him. That your main purpose here is to upset him with your wonderful personality and charm." Phasma nodded as you blinked, Kylo instantly shaking his head, just about to defend himself but Phasma kept speaking. "What we have here is a simple issue: Kylo is mistaking his _enormous_ crush on you with a rivalry. He thinks that that's what he's feeling in his chest and all throughout his body... Rather, it's actually adoration."

"W- What?!" Kylo shouted, shaking his head. "No, that's-"

"It's true." Hux nodded. "He wanted me to demote you because you were too nice and your smile had upset him. We know that that's just butterflies in his stomach." Hux snickered as you felt your cheeks burn.

Turning to look up at Kylo, you swallowed. "Is... Is that true?" You asked and he quickly shook his head.

"No. No! I do not have to explain myself! I know what I'm saying and you are trying to-" Seeing you smile, he instantly lost his train of thought. "Stop that!"

"See." Phasma pointed.

"It's the smile." Hux nodded.

Staring down at you, eyes focused on your smile as he gulped, your smile only widened. "Fuck." He cursed, looking away as he felt his heart sink.

"We will let you two be." Phasma bowed her head, patting your shoulder as Hux followed her.

"Don't accidentally kill her, Ren. I'm sure this is the only person who would ever like you on this base—let alone—in the _universe_." Hux snickered as he walked off, Kylo being too focused on his racing heart to do something about it.

Standing in silence as you looked up at Kylo, seeing he was still looking away, cheeks tinting with red, you sucked in a small breath and grabbed his hand carefully. Feeling your hand gently wrap around his, his head snapped in your direction as his eyebrows narrowed. "What are you doing?" He asked, more than ready to snatch his hand away, but you flashed him your smile again.

"Supreme Leader, would you look to go to dinner with me?" You softly asked as his heart raced, standing in silence and just staring down at you, unable to even speak. "I'll take that as a yes." Turning in your spot and walking away, you pulled him with you as he so easily obliged, not understanding as to how he had become so... weak. He was so easily letting you tug him away as if he were some lost puppy.

Seeing you look over your shoulder at him, you grinned and winked, causing his eyes to widen. "Don't worry, I'll make it worth while."


	18. The Stars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request:   
> Hi lovely, I was wondering if you could write something about the reader who is a queen and had a secret relationship with Ben Solo and when he turned, he was told reader 'died' in childbirth along with their twins. Later on, when Kylo becomes supreme leader, he finds out they're not dead and he reunites with them? Sorry it's so detailed, but thank you in advance. ❤

The fresh scent of newly blossomed roses filled your senses as you had shut your eyes, taking in the euphoric smell. It sent chills throughout out your body as you felt the cool breeze hit the exposed parts of your body that your gown hadn't covered. The gentle blaze of the sun shined on your figure and brought a comforting warmth. Spring time was always the loveliest to experiences, the sweet smells, the soft weather, the pale blue skies free of any clouds... It was one of the few things that kept you at ease...

Aside from the sound of giggles from the pair of children rushing and swirling around the stretched field of bright red roses. The gentle echo of their laughters reverberated within your ears and brought a sense of tranquility to you as your eyes opened, seeing the duo interlock arms and hop in their spots, twirling together.

Smiling, you bent forward and picked up the basket filled with freshly picked berries from just off the hill and over to the private field filled with all sorts of growing fruits and vegetables. "Lets go, my sweet stars." You softly called out to the twins as they ushered over to you. The one with soft brown hair that reached just before their bottom was your daughter, Jaina. She was as lively as they come, full of energy and joy, a soft soul but had quite the sharp tongue. Then there was the one who stood just beside her, holding Jaina's hand as she held yours. Jacen's hair was much darker and shorter, soft curls reaching just above his shoulders as his precious ears peaked out faintly from the darkened hair. A contrast of light and dark. He reminded you much of his father. With this honey brown eyes and dimpled smile... to the hair and warm heart.

It didn't pain you, it was more of a gentle reminder. Of what you once had. Of what you were once blessed by the stars with. Two beautiful children who had given you the world by  _being_  your world. After six years of just being you and the two, you felt as if you've found some sort of balance.

It took a lot in you, stepping down from being a queen, disappearing, having everyone assume you were dead for the greater good... It pained you, but it had to be done. For you and for the safety of your twins. Only so many knew about your whereabouts. You weren't too far off, but, you were hidden within the overlapping hills, towering trees and distant cliffs that lead to the ocean. Your little, secluded home that smelled of sweet scents, something you were now approaching.

It was a nightmare that haunted you every now and then. The day you had lost it all. The day you lost  _him_.

Ben Solo was your world, you loved him more than life, itself. He was your everything and more. Your moon and stars, your universe.

He was troubled, you knew this very well, and from time to time he was able to sneak into the palace, and right into your room to find comfort in your warm embrace and sweet words. That soft aura and gentle complexion. Your existence being his anchor.

But, the less you saw him, the worse it had become.

You missed him, and every passing day took a piece of your heart with it. You just wished it hadn't been under those circumstances...

He knew of your pregnancy, it wasn't something you could hide when the Force was strong within him. And you wouldn't  _dare_  hide it. You saw him in your future, saw him to be your husband one day, the father of your children... even if it was all in secrecy. But things never went according to plan, no matter how much your heart longed for your beloved Jedi warrior.

"Come along, sweethearts." You waved your hand as the twins rushed in, hand in hand, with a fit of giggles.

"Mama, when will we see nana again?" Jacen asked as he had let go of his sister's hand, settling his small basket on top of the table just beside him.

"Hmm..." Sitting your much larger basket beside his, you knelt down and placed your hands on his waist. "I'm not so sure, she's quite busy..." You said as Jacen sighed, Jaina walking over to you and playing with your hair. "She will come soon, I promise you that." You nodded.

Leia was one of the few that knew about your secret relationship with Ben. She read her son too well. Although she didn't see him quite often, the New Republic did have a treaty with the people of your home planet and she could see the shine in your eyes each time she mentioned her son. After all... she was the one who introduced him to you long before you started seeing him.

Reaching out for Jaina with one arm as your other held Jacen, you pulled the two you into a tight embrace before kissing their puffy cheeks. "Mama loves her little shooting stars so much." You said, smiling down at them, caressing their hair as they looked you in the eyes. Eyes that reminded you much of Ben's... Although Jaina's weren't the same color as his, they were still much like Ben's in their own way.

"We love you, too." The two said in sync before giggling and nudging one another for copying the other, you watching with a bright smile before tickling their pudgy tummies as they rushed off.

Standing up and preparing for dinner, getting the food ready by cooking the meat, rinsing and chopping vegetables before you served two small plates, and then a bigger one for yourself. Setting up the dinner table as you called out to the twins, you looked out the window of your small cottage and eyed the distant ocean, taking in a small breath. Quiet moments like these made you wonder what life was like with Ben there, beside you.

Not out there as a different man, believing you to be dead...

The sad thing was, the lie wasn't for Ben. The lie was for the cruel entity that lurked out there and lingered within the Force and in the darkest corners of the galaxy. One you wouldn't dare speak or think of.

"Mama, the food smells good!" Jacen nodded, taking his seat at the small table before Jaina rushed over and hugged your leg.

"Thank you!" She smiled up at you.

"Of course, sweetheart." You smiled, running your fingers through her hair before guiding her to her seat, across from her twin.

Settling in your seat as the twins gave thanks to the Force and the stars for their food, they dig into their plates with their usual mannerisms. The two giggling at one another, kicking and exchanging vegetables for meat. You couldn't help but chuckle as you shook your head, knowing very well they had some sort of telepathic communication going on. Besides the fact that they were twins, you had a strong sense that they were Force sensitive. Although they didn't entirely show any signs that they could levitate items or use the Force to persuade you into letting their bed time be later, there was something about them that made you believe it.

Eating your meal and finishing up as the twins had as well, they helped you clean up the table as you gave them a bowl of berries for dessert—enough time for you to clean the kitchen up. Once they had finished, they patiently waited for you to help them get ready for bed.

Leading them to the washroom you gave them a bath, helped them change into their pajamas before they went to brush their teeth. As they had, you leaned against the doorframe and watched with a smile, reminding them not to miss any of their little teeth and to rinse out well.

When it came to tucking them in, the two had separate beds that were quite close to one another, sometimes you'd find them holding hands, other times you found one in the other's bed—knowing they had physical contact to their twin helped them sleep better. "Alright my starfighters, tomorrow I'm thinking we can have a picnic on the beach. Would you like that?"

"Yes, please!" Jacen exclaimed as you chuckled.

"Jaina?" You asked, looking over at your daughter, who had been gazing out of the window in her room. "Honey?"

Looking over at you, she nodded with a sweet smile. "Okay!"

Letting out a small breath in relief, you leaned over and kissed her forehead before she hugged you. "Goodnight, sunshine."

"Goodnight, mama." Jaina yawned.

Moving over to Jacen, you kissed his forehead as he hugged you tight, kissing your cheek. "Goodnight, moonlight."

"Goodnight, mama!" Jacen breathed, cuddling you for a moment before letting go. "I love you."

"I love you, too." You smiled, sitting up and ruffling his hair before looking over at Jaina and seeing her gazing out the window once again. "I love you, Jaina..."

"Love you, mama." She muttered, too caught up in her thoughts. You wondered what it was she had been thinking about, what she had been seeing or observing...

With a small exhale of breath as you stood up, you eyed the twins once more before turning away and leaving the room, over to your own. Undressing and stepping into the refresher, letting the warm water ease your muscles, you freshened up before exiting and drying yourself. Wrapped in a towel, you grabbed your undergarment and nightwear, changing before undoing your updo and brushing through the long strands of hair.

Standing from the small vanity you had sat at, you walked over to your bed and pulled the sheets back, but before you went to rest, you looked out the window. Searching the expanse of stars with a longing that lingered deep within your soul, you felt a small frown form on your lips before you turned your head away and made your way underneath the sheets. Somewhere, out there, Ben was. Somewhere, alive.

━━━━━━

A violent tremor had shaken you awake as your eyes shot open. Your heart began to race as you looked out the window to see a distant fire, as if the forest was ablaze. Peeling your sheets off of you and stumbling out of bed, rushing out of your room and into the twins, your heart shattered. "J— Jaina?! Jacen?! Panicking, you searched the room, every crevice you could. "Jaina! Jacen! Where are you, babies?!" Feeling your eyes prick with tears, you sprinted out of the room and searched every possible inch of the cottage. They had to be somewhere, hiding. No one could've taken them and they were smart not to run away! "JAINA! JACEN!"

Barging out of your home, running into the hills and across the fields, your heart sank at the sight of the fire. Spinning in your spot, eyeing your surroundings in hopes you'd find them, you heard distant shouting. Gulping and turning in its direction, you ran off into the woods, not seeming to care if your feet were bare and that rocks and broken twigs were piercing your skin. You weren't even thinking about yourself or the sheer consequences of running in there, alone with no weapons or any sort of protection.

"Jaina?! Jacen?!" You called out once again, sprinting past the tall trees, heart racing faster and faster as your breathing quickened. "Jaina! Jaina, baby! Jacen!" Crying out, feeling your bottom lip tremble as your tears streamed down your cheeks, you tried picking up your pace, but your calves were burning and your feet began to ache in pain. "JAINA! JACEN!"

Stumbling to a stop as you spotted men cladded in white armor, holding weapons that exerted fire, your heart sank. Taking quiet steps backwards, breathing in heavily, you spun around, only to gasp. At the sight of the chrome armor dressing the towering figure, something knocked harshly against your head and sent you back into a world void of color.

━━━━━━

"Who is she?"

"I don't know. I found her within the woods during our search."

"This wasn't part of the mission."

"I understand, but she had seen it all and was about to run off."

"Then why didn't you kill her?"

"Because, she is the mother."

"The mother?"

"Of the twins we found."

Bolting awake in your spot, flinching as your wrists and ankles had hit metal, you blinked a few times to adjust your eyes. Seeing a pair of figures before you, your heart sank. You knew the patch on the red man's shoulder. The First Order. Feeling your breath hitch, your eyes jumped over to the chrome armor, then down to the restraints holding you. "Wh— Where am I? Where are my twins?!" You frantically asked, looking at either of them.

"And it was wise to bring her, because..." The ginger spoke.

"Those twins are no ordinary twins, Hux." Hearing the voice, your heart skipped a beat. A woman was underneath all that armor.

"Where are they?" You breathlessly asked. "Where are my twins? Where are they?!"

Sighing, Hux shook his head. "I will not deal with a distressed mother looking for her twins. We either turn them into the stormtrooper program—"

"No!" You exclaimed, shaking your head violently as the tears resurfaced. "Those are my children! I will not give them to you for your use of evil!"

Snarling, Hux's attention was caught by a stormtrooper that had marched in. "Sir. Captain." They bowed.

"What is it, FN-2058?" The woman in chrome asked.

"The children have gone missing—"

"Unbelievable." Hux screwed his eyes back. "Just what we need. Two beasts running around freely!" He stomped out of the room.

Feeling your heart pick up in speed, you shut your eyes for a moment.  _Please, be safe. Please, be safe. Please, be safe_. You thought it like a prayer, hoping the twins were smart enough to sneak around through tight passages only they could fit in if they were to escape. All that mattered now was them being safe, not you.

"You." Looking up with a blurry vision, you blinked. "What is your name?"

Gulping, you furrowed your eyebrows.

"I asked you a question." The captain tightened her grip around her blaster, your eyes trailing down to her finger that was ready to reach for the trigger. "What is your name?"

"Y/N..." You nodded, looking up at the shiny helmet. "Why are we here? Why—" before your questions could be answered, the captain and stormtrooper left you with nothing but silence. Nothing but the hum of whatever vessel or base you were on and the distant echo of the air. You tried not to think deeply, afraid you'd worry yourself more. The twins (although very young) were very smart. And, if you were right about your theory, the Force would be on their side.

Shutting your eyes and letting your head hang, your thoughts melted back to the day you had given birth, the moment you had to run off before anyone could see you. You only had so little help, and the cottage was your only safe haven. No one had heard of you ever again when you disappeared that night, those who had known you were pregnant spread the word that you—and your children—had passed away during the process. It reached all throughout the galaxy... at least, to those who know of you and your planet. Your kingdom mourned for you, they held a funeral with an empty casket. No one ever knew what truly happened to you and you knew it was best that way for the sake of your children.

But, in the position you were in now, it was absolutely pointless when the one thing you didn't want to happen, happened. You feared  _he_  would find them and manipulate them the way he had their father. You were afraid he would turn them against you like that and that would be the end of you. You were terrified and your raked sobs were proof of that. All you ever wanted was love and a family, but it seemed as if you were cursed to have a loose grip on either.

Feeling exhausted from the worrying and fearing, the whimpering and whining, your head throbbed in pain as your heart ached in sorrow. This was never meant to happen, this  _shouldn't_  have happened. You had failed your children like you failed the love of your life.

Hearing the hiss of the door open before you, your chest caved in as your eyes squeezed shut. You knew this was the end for you. They found the twins and declared your execution. You had failed as a mother and the weight was coming down all at once. Your heart echoed within your ears as your blood rushed, the anticipation was eating you alive. You knew this was the end of the line for you, after so long of trying to keep hidden.

Sucking in a sharp breath, the sound of the restraints popping open made your stomach turn as your body fell forward. Just as you thought you were going to collide with the floor, your body pressed up against... someone else's. Falling to your knees as they knelt before you, your aching wrists bent as your hands pressed against their chest. Forcing your eyes open, they trailed up the black material before you, towards a semi exposed neck, then a pair of lips. As your eyes lifted, your heart rate grew faster and faster.

That is until your eyes landed on their eyes.

Those eyes.

 _His_  eyes.

Staring in disbelief, rounded eyes welling up with tears all over again, your shaky fingers tried grabbing fistfuls of his tunic.

Kylo Ren stared down at you, not one set of emotion apparent as too many were fighting for first place. His eyes trailed all over your face, every bit he had known long before. It was you. His beloved queen. His forbidden lover. His anchor.

Clenching his jaw the more he looked at you, the shine in his eyes grew more visible the longer he stared. "Ben..." You breathed, breaking the silence. Reaching a trembling hand up to his face, your digits carefully trailed down the scar that had caught your attention. He looked so much older and... tired. His eyes were darker than ever, surrounded by dark circles and flesh tones that showed he hardly slept. His hair was different. Longer, flatter, yet... still the hair you loved to feel. It was him, but it was a torn up version. "I am so s—"

Gripping a fistful of your hair, he brought you to him as his lips crashed against your own, the taste of tears blending in as you whimpered into it, shaking against him as you held on. He kissed you until neither of you could breathe, until you felt lightheaded and wavered. He kissed you and kissed you until the feeling of your lips had left an imprint.

Pushing back to catch your breath, you looked over his shoulder and felt your heart skip a beat at the pair of figures. "Babies..." You breathed as they rushed over to you, falling into your arms as you wailed out, feeling their small arms wrap around you tightly. "You're safe, you're okay..." You whimpered, caressing their backs, worrying slipping away.

"Mama..." Hearing Jaina, you leaned back and looked at her. "I found him."

Eyeing her, you blinked. "You found who?"

"Papa." She softly spoke as your heart staggered.

"Wh—" Unsure of what to even ask, you looked over at Jacen. "What..."

"Jaina told me to come with her. To find papa." The little boy explained. "She felt him in the stars."

Looking back over at Jaina, she nodded. "He spoke to me in my dreams."

Blinking a few times, you looked over at the man before you. "You... did?"

Eyeing you, Kylo nodded. "I felt her presence when the Force had awakened within her." Feeling your chest cave in, almost as if out of breath, you took in shallow breaths. "I didn't know what it was or who it had been coming from, but I saw her in my dreams. Then I saw him in them." He continued. "Then I saw you. She showed me everything through her eyes."

Trying to breathe properly, nearly hyperventilating, you gulped. "You..."

"You hid them to protect them from Snoke." Kylo calmly spoke as you looked at him with such emotion. "You did what was  _right_."

Gulping, you looked at the twins for a moment as they kept their focus on you, still holding on. "You're not... upset?" You asked, looking back up at him... but, he shook his head. "What if  _he_  sees—"

Sensing your panic, Kylo shook his head once again. "He's gone."

"Gone?" Your eyes widened, but with the look in his own, your shoulders sank. "You did it?"

Seeing him nod, Kylo carefully reached over and placed his hands on the twins backs. "I am the Supreme Leader now. There is nothing and no one left to fear." He assured, looking deeply in your eyes. "You and the twins no longer have to hide." Feeling your fears slip away as your eyes shut for a moment, relishing in the relief, you reopened your eyes. "You are forever safe with me."

Snaking his arms around you and the twins, you slumped into him as your heart felt heavy, more than it had ever before. "Thank you."


	19. Homecoming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request:  
> YO BEAN, I GOT ONE FOR YA. One Ben Solo x Reader where the reader grew up with Ben since they were kids and are the best of friends until Luke's Academy kinda separates them. They go on their first important mission together and it takes like a billion wrong turns with reader getting hurt/sick and Ben protects her and they basically "re-bond" with each other while finishing the mission/getting home. Anything is up to you!!

The hum of your lightsaber echoed across the training room walls. Twirling your weapon, sweeping across the floor and practicing self defense movements, you fell to your knees and took in deep breaths. Feeling the sweat drip form your forehead as strands of your hair from your braid stuck to your cheeks, you deactivated your lightsaber and swiped at your face. You were completely wiped out, body exhausted and begging for rest, but you wouldn't give it just yet.

Standing to your feet, forcing yourself up, you tried steadying your breathing so you could continue on. Twirling the hilt of your lightsaber as you activated it once again, you went to slash it in the air, but your lightsaber fell in your grip as you fell back. Not even bothering to stop yourself from falling, you were ready for the impact, but only felt an arm wrap around your waist as your lightsaber floated in the air.

"You masochist." Hearing that familiar voice, you smiled.

"I've gotta train..." You spoke in a scratchy tone, clearly overexerting yourself and on the verge of collapsing. "I have to train..."

"I'm sure you do." Ben snickered carefully settling you down before him, reaching out his palm so your lightsaber would fly into it. "But even you need to take a break." Holding the lightsaber, Ben waved it as you tried reaching for it, but he pulled away.

"I won't train anymore." You shook your head, but Ben arched an eyebrow. "I won't!"

"I don't believe you..." He hummed, but you tilted your head and gave him a look.

"Come on, Ben. You know you're just as bad as me." Crossing your arms, Ben only sighed, knowing you were right. "Uh-huh. That's what I thought." Smiling at him as you sat there, rubbing your wrist as your hooded eyes begged for sleep, you let out a small breath. "Why are you here?" You couldn't help but ask, the question lingering as you eyed your lightsaber in his hand.

Furrowing his eyebrows, Ben didn't expect that sort of reaction out of you. It had been so long since the two of you had one on one them. As best friends, it was abnormal not to hang around often, but after joining Luke's academy, a wedge placed itself between the two of you. Either of you grew distant—unintentionally. Ben was on another level, one of the most skilled... if not, the most skilled of the padawans. Then, there was you. You struggled here and there. You weren't terrible, but you weren't all that amazing. That's why you trained so hard when everyone else was asleep. When no one else was supposed to be around.

Of course... Ben  _had_  to be the one awake.

"What do you mean?" He asked, narrowing his eyebrows further. "To see you, of course!"

Shaking your head, you stood to your feet. "Ben, we haven't seen one another like this in months. Maybe even a year. I don't know anymore." You began as Ben looked up at you. "We... We're too busy. Too busy with training to even care."

Frowning, Ben blinked. "What are you trying to say? That we can't be friends just because we're at different levels of training?" He raised his voice.

Lifting a finger, you sucked in a breath and shook your head again. "No. I didn't say that. I never said that."

"You're suggesting it!" He exclaimed. "Ever since we first started training we've been separated and you've distanced yourself from me!" Ben pointed accusingly.

"Don't turn this on me. You know it happened on its own. You're you and I'm me." You spoke, exhaustion in your tone.

Taking in a deep breath, knowing he was overreacting, Ben watched as you walked away. "Where are you going?"

"To rest. Some of us aren't as blessed to be as skillful in the Force, naturally." Lifting your hand, the lightsaber flew from his own, into yours before you left the training room.

Standing in his spot with a hunch in his back, Ben rubbed his face with a low groan, the hollow room echoing with the wind and natural sounds. The last thing he needed was for you—the one person he appreciated the most in the universe—to feel lesser than him.

 

* * *

 

You must've been dead. You had to have been. At least, that's what it felt like. Your body was heavy, heavier than it had ever been, and you couldn't seem to even open your eyes—a simple task as that. A groan left your sealed lips as you forced yourself to turn over from draping your arm over the side of your bed. Late night training was catching up to you dearly.

Lying flat on your back, opening your eyes as they fluttered from the natural lights that seeped into your hut, you sighed. Another long day of training. Sometimes you wondered if it was even worth joining your best friend in his uncle's Jedi Academy all because you were sensitive to the Force... Sure, it was a lot of help, but it was also exhausting. And it made you practically anti-social from the world around you. Not to mention, disassociation was at an all time high. "Humph..."

"Hey!" Groaning at the sound of a knock you anticipated the moment your eyes opened, you rubbed your forehead. "Master Luke is requesting your appearance!" Furrowing your eyebrows, you suddenly sat up, earning an unsatisfying head rush.

"Hell..." Sighing as you shut your eyes for a moment, you then stood from your bed and went on with your morning routine before getting into your robes. You wondered what it was that Master Skywalker wanted to speak to you about... Had Ben said something? You hoped not, you knew he wouldn't.

Making your way into the temple and towards the main hall, feeling your lightsaber at your hip, you took in a deep breath before approaching your master. Light on your feet with your hand at your sides, you came to a stop a few feet behind him before he sensed your presence and turned. "Good morning, Y/N." He greeted with a nod as you had done the same.

"Good morning, Master Skywalker." You greeted.

"I have an announcement for you... once your fellow Jedi comes." He sighed with a shake of his head at the thought of his padawan being late. As for you, your eyebrows knitted. An announcement? For what?

"May I ask... what this announcement will be for?" You pushed, in hopes he'd let something slip before whoever you were waiting for would show up.

Looking over at you, Luke took in a small breath. "A mission." He nodded as your eyebrows lifted. "Your very first."

Blinking a few times, more than positive that you were still asleep, you were just about to speak out but someone beat you to it.

"Sorry I was late." Hearing Ben's voice, your heart sank as your parted lips sealed shut. Just as he was walking in, his pace slowed down at the sight of you. "Master Luke..." He began, forcing his eyes away from your back before taking your side.

"Tardiness is a sign of lack of responsibility, Ben..." Luke arched an eyebrow as his nephew sighed. "I called you in with Y/N because I have a mission for you two to go on. "

"A mission?" Ben's eyes widened, excitement filling his veins. "Where to?"

"It's a small one, but you still have to be cautious. Coruscant carries some old Jedi records that I need to retrieve. After the Empire took over the Jedi Temple, most of it has turned to dust. But, the building still stands and there is a high chance that there are some documents..." Tuning Luke out as you stood there, focus elsewhere, you realized Ben hadn't even acknowledged your presence. He seemed much happier than you expected to be—although, you weren't upset about that, you liked him being happy... You just wondered if the minor argument meant nothing at all and just faded away from him.

You hated thinking too deeply into situations, it was enough that you hardly ever spoke to him... or anyone for that matter. Your life was training and nothing but training, and you were starting to wonder if it had been your fault that the two of you drifted.

"...and I think the two of you are the ones most skilled for the task." Snapping out of your thoughts, you looked over at Luke with a stutter in your heart beat. "Ben, you are the most advanced out of all my students. And Y/N," Your master said while turning his attention to you, "You are extremely tactical. I can tell. You think before you do. That would balance out with Ben's do before thinking." He nodded as Ben groaned.

Feeling your lips form into an 'o', you blinked a few times. Had you heard him right? Was he relying on you as well? "Th— Thank you!" You nodded with a smile, heart racing with excitement. And Ben could sense it as he looked over at you. He couldn't remember the last time he saw a genuine smile on your face like the one you had been wearing at the moment. He had hoped it would stay for a while, he missed it.

"The Resistance was kind enough to lend us a small vessel for us to use for the mission. A two seater with enough room for you to stay on overnight should you need to. The mission shouldn't be any longer than a day." Luke explained as Ben turned his head back to him.

"When do we leave?"

"Well..." Looking at the shadows before him that melted from you and Ben, Luke lifted his head and smiled. "Right now."

Feeling your breath get caught in your throat, realizing you hadn't paid a single attention to look when he discussed the mission, your heart sank.

"What about packing?" Ben asked.

"There's nothing you need to pack. This shouldn't take you a whole two days." Luke crossed his arms as Ben sighed. "The ship awaits you!"

Shaking his head, Ben turned and walked away from the great hall, towards the main entrance of the temple. You stood there for a moment, unsure of what to do, looking over at Luke awkwardly before smiling and scurrying off to follow your best friend. As you rushed down the steps to catch up with his long strides, your stomach grumbled as you instantly frowned. "Kriff..."

"Didn't eat?" Ben asked as you held your stomach, looking up to see him with his back still facing you.

"...Possibly..." You mumbled.

"Today's your lucky day." Sensing a change in the Force, your hand extended out as a protein bar instantly fell into it. These were meant for training sessions, not replacements of breakfast... but anything was appealing. "I knew there was a reason behind me getting that. Just thought my breakfast wasn't enough." Ben shrugged as you looked at the back of his head where he now placed his hands.

"Thank you..." Pealing away at the wrapper, you looked around before shoving majority of the bar into your mouth, too eager to eat it bit by bit.

Looking over his shoulder and seeing you struggle to eat the bar as a whole, Ben held in a snicker, turning his attention ahead and seeing the Resistance spacecraft in the distance. "I'll be piloting." He said as you nodded, mouth still stuffed with the bar.

"Mmmf— Okay!" You spoke with your mouth full, using your hand as a shield. Seeing Ben look over at you, your cheeks reddened, trying to avert his eyes as you walked a head and entered the ship before him.

Watching you walk away and disappearing into the ship, Ben couldn't help but grin to himself, knowing very well that you were flustered. He felt it. The two of you may have drifted, and hiding your emotions from Force users may have been something you [the padawans]have learned... but he felt yours. He felt yours so easily no matter how hard you tried to hide it.

Entering the ship and making his way to the canopy—where you had been patiently waiting—Ben took the pilot seat and worked on the panel. Occasionally looking over at you as you sat there with your hand over your mouth, still chewing, he bit back a laugh.

"What?"

Hearing your muffled voice, he shook his head. "Nothing."

"Sure..." You grumbled, finally swallowing before sitting back in the seat with a sigh. "Do you think you'll need me?"

Furrowing his eyebrow, Ben looked over for a moment, seeing you adjust in your seat. "I'm the son of an expert pilot, I'm positive I can do this in my sleep."

Scoffing, you shook your head. "Good, cause  _I'm_  going to sleep."

"Wh—"

"Good luck!" At that, you shut your eyes, leaving Ben there to himself as he huffed.

 

* * *

 

 

"Wake up, sleeping Jedi." Hearing Ben speak up, you sighed, fluttering your eyes open and seeing that you had—in fact—landed on Coruscant. Sitting up and adjusting your focus, you leaned forward to see the cityscape.

"Wow, we didn't die." You joked, Ben rolled his eyes as the two of you exiting the ship.

"Of course we didn't die. I'm an expert pilot." He emphasized as you slowly nodded. "Let's get to it, the temple isn't too far off." With a look over his shoulder, Ben lead the way. He expected you to follow, but when he didn't hear your footsteps, he sighed and looked over.

"I spoke too soon..." You blinked, as you had your hands up, an man with a blaster aiming it at you.

"Don't try anything, pretty boy. I've been waiting for someone to land nearby so I can steal their ship!" A small creature, the height of Ben's knees, snarled. "And I'm taking—"

With a swift flick of Ben's wrist, the creature went flying back. Walking over and kicking the blaster away from the creatures grip, Ben stepped on their hand. "I think it's best you get as far away from here as possible. Understand?" He seethed as you watched. "You're lucky I didn't decapitate you for pointing a blaster at my best friend."

" _Ben_." You spoke up, causing him to step away as the creature stood up. Just before it could reach for its blaster, Ben extended his palm as the weapon flew into it.

"Damn wizard!" It yelled before running off.

Loosening his jaw and tossing the blaster to a side, he looked at you. "Don't even."

"How could you have not sensed danger?" He asked, leaning into you.

"You didn't sense it, either." You defended, crossing your arms.

Sighing, Ben grabbed your upper arm and pulled you with him. "Now is not the time to play this back and forth game."

"Psht! As if  _I_  started it." You grumbled but Ben ignored you, pulling you with him.

Pulling your hood on as you walked along the crowded walkways, Ben lead the way through tight spaces as his towering frame was able to see above the crowd unlike your own. Staying closely behind as you two walked along, a figure bumped into Ben. " _Hey_."

" _Hmph_."

Furrowing your eyebrows, you watched the figure walk away before doing a double take, seeing something shine within their grip. "You!" You shouted, turning around and running after as they broke into a sprint.

"Y/N!" Ben called out. "Dammit, not now..."

Chasing them down, shoving past people, you looked up and used the Force to cause crates to block their path. A few had hit them but they jumped over most, causing you to do the same. You really didn't want to rely on your saber.

"Y/N! Y/N!"

You could hear him call your name, but you were too focused on the living being you were hunting down to look over. "HEY! STOP!"

Watching you run further out, Ben shook his head. Before he could ask what you had been doing, you instantly tackled whoever it was as Ben nearly skidded to a stop. "What the hell was that—" Feeling something hit his foot, he looked down and spotted his lightsaber hilt.

"They stole your lightsaber." You hissed, keeping the creature still. "You're lucky I noticed in time." Hearing it spit out in its native tongue as it squirmed beneath you, Ben picked up his saber before looking down at you.

"I ought to cut his hand off." He muttered under his breath. "Let him go. We have more important things to handle."

Taking in a deep breath as you looked up at him, you nodded before standing up, the creature shoving you back as Ben caught your arm. "A subtle choice you've made." You spoke, brushing down your robes before turning. "This mission better not be filled with bad luck. We've run into trouble twice already." You reminded as you lifted your fingers.

"I am well aware of that." Ben nodded, turning away and leaving the path once again. But, before he want too far, he grabbed your hand and lightly pushed you in front of him. He didn't want to risk you getting kidnapped or killed.

 

* * *

 

"So much for good luck..." You mumbled to Ben as the two of you hid from afar, eyeing the temple. "Stormtroopers galore. What are they doing out here? I thought the old Jedi temple was nothing but an archive? Why would they be here?"

"Maybe for the same exact documents Luke needs." Ben suggested as he eyed the white armor. "We don't have time to conjure ideas, we must go immediately before one sees us."

"Right." You nodded. "Let's go this way," you pointed, "they are least likely to notice us."

Immediately ducking as you rushed off, Ben took in a deep breath, shaking his head before following. "The last thing I need is to get on her bad side by not doing as she says." He grumbled to himself, making sure not to lose track of you as you had hurried your pace.

"There's more of them..." You spoke in a hushed tone. "We have to find a way in..."

Sucking in a deep breath as he peaked over, Ben scratched his head in thought. "I'll distract them—"

"No!" You quickly reached out, latching onto his wrist as he looked at you. "If you go out there we'd be in a whirlwind of trouble!" You shook your head.

"How else are we supposed to get inside?!" Ben furrowed his eyebrows. "I can handle a couple of bucket brains."

At the sight of Ben's smirk, you narrowed your eyes. "A couple? Ben, there's easily a few dozen, if not, more."

Sighing, Ben looked over to the 'troopers once more before looking back at you. "What do you suggest then?"

Taking in a deep breath, you bit your inner lip. "We go in disguise. Dress like one of them."

"As if I haven't heard that one before." Ben rolled his eyes but you arched an eyebrow.

"Have you got any better ideas than that that isn't willingly throwing yourself at them?" You tilted your head, but Ben sealed his lips shut. "We have to get two that are alone. It shouldn't be that hard." Looking around you then spotted a pair guarding a side entrance. "Those two."

"Alright, not hard, we—" Before Ben could finish, you stood up and quietly rushed over, using the Force to cause the two stormtroopers to bang the other against the head with their blasters. "Huh..." Eyeing the 'troopers collide with the ground, Ben's eyes fell back to you as you waved your hand for him to join you.

"Okay, you take one and I take the other, we take their armor off and put them on." You ordered as Ben nodded, grabbing one of the bodies and dragging them into the building's shadow.

"Are you sure you're gonna fit in their armor?" He asked as he began removing the armor from the 'trooper he took. "You're a little short to be a stormtrooper."

"No one will notice, it isn't like they're clones." You shook your head.

Quick to place the armor on, you and Ben placed the helmets on before making your way inside. Casually dismissing other 'troopers as you passed them, you felt a shift in the Force. "There's something wrong..." You mumbled to Ben.

"Yeah, it's our height difference."

Rolling your eyes, you shook your head. "No." Looking over your shoulder, you saw a pair of stormtroopers in the distance slowly following. "We're being followed."

"What? How? No one noticed." He shook his head. But then he felt it, too. "They don't know and we're almost there."

"Ben, you feel it, too." You said, looking over once more and seeing the pair pick up their pace. "We need to hurry up."

"Follow me." Turning a corner, you quickly followed him.

Your heart began to race faster as your instincts were kicking in. The plan was starting to fail and the Force was trying to warn you... but you were so close, you couldn't quit now. Not when you had a mission to fulfill and not when you were smack in the middle of the guarded temple-then-turned-palace.

"We're almost there." Ben said as you nodded, looking over once more to see another set of troopers appear from your left.

"There's more. They're catching on." You uttered, looking back over at Ben.

"We're almost there, that's the entrance right there." He nudged his head as you looked ahead and picked up your pace. With Ben's long strides, he reached the door before you, walking in, but before you could make your way in, the door shut.

Instantly turning around, Ben's eyes widened.

"Kriff..." You breathed, feeling the life force's coming closer and closer. You were gonna have to do something you wouldn't be proud of. " _Go on without me, I will handle this._ "

Hearing your voice in his head, Ben removed his helmet and shook his head. "No—"

" _Go on, it's up to you now!_ " At that, the sound of blaster fire made Ben flinch before he turned and rushed off.

Hiding behind a pillar as you removed your helmet and tossed the blaster to a side, you activated your lightsaber and began deflecting blaster fires the moment you jumped out. You had to make sure not one of them would get inside, Ben had to retrieve what Luke needed.

The more stormtroopers you took down, the more that appeared. You were outnumbered, easily two dozen now surrounding you as your heart was in your throat. It almost felt like everything Luke had taught you was seeping away and leaving your memory.

You started to panic, you were overthinking the situation rather than acting.

" _Being rational is good, thinking before you act is good. Overthinking is not_." Luke's words rang in your head. " _Once you overthink, you fear, and when you fear, you allow the darkness to take over_."

Taking in a deep breath, you clenched your fist and slammed it.

Hearing a rumble as the ground shook, Ben's head snapped over to the door as he secured the documents Luke needed. Rushing back over and pounding his fist against the panel for it to open, he hissed before stepping back and firing the blaster at it. Hearing the door slide open, his eyes widened at all the stormtroopers lying on the ground, unconscious. Lifting his focus to you, Ben couldn't help but send a smile your way.

Looking over at Ben and smiling back, a sharp pain was suddenly felt against your thigh as you grunted. "Y/N!" Ben shouted, reaching his palm out as he sent the stormtrooper flying back, colliding with the ground. "Y/N!" Running towards you as you held your thigh, Ben was quick to wrap your arm over his shoulder and guide the two of you out.

"We— We need to get back to the ship and leave." You breathed.

"I know, I know." Ben panted, rushing through the halls. "Just as long as we don't run into anyone else. "I promise we will get out of here in one piece."

Making your way back to the ship was anything but easy. The amount of stormtroopers you had to avoid along with the hordes of people in Coruscant, you eventually found yourself being placed down on a crate with your wounded leg outstretched.

"We need to patch this—"

Lifting your hand and pressing it against Ben's shoulder, you looked him in the eyes. "We need to get out of here first, we don't know who followed us."

Sucking in a deep breath, cursing under his breath, Ben turned and rushed to the canopy, doing as told. All he wanted to do was clean out your wound and make sure you were okay, but he knew better, he had to get the two of you away from danger and back to where it was safe.

Making the jump to hyper space and ending up in another point in the galaxy, Ben put the ship on autopilot before getting the first aid kit. "I'm s—"

"Don't." You shook your head as you breathed in. "We got what we came for, right?" You softly smiled as Ben looked up from the kit, towards you. "We did..."

"We did." He nodded, taking in a small breath before tearing the hole in your pants to reveal the wound, cleaning it properly as you bit your tongue. You watched as he carefully treated the injury, wrapping it up in a temporary bacta bandage for the time being. "That should do it..."

"Thank you." Looking down at the bandage, you carefully touched it before Ben grabbed your hand. "What is it?" You asked, lifting your focus and eyeing him. Standing up from his spot, Ben gently pulled you towards him as he leaned in, lips pressing against yours as your heart fluttered. Pushing him away, noses just barely touching, you shook your head. "What are you doing?"

"I... wanted to kiss you?" He said, blinking. "Did I just ruin our— Do you not like me like how I like—"

Reaching for his tunic and tugging him back to you, you kissed him, smiling into it.

 

* * *

 

 

"One day was all it took, huh?" Luke asked as you and Ben found yourselves standing before him, finally back at the temple. "Explains the blaster wound."

"Wasn't easy but we did it." You nodded. "I'll be fine, Ben tended to it."

"Good, good..." Eyeing the small drive in his hand that held the files, Luke slowly nodded before tossing it on the floor and smashing it with his heel.

"Master!" You gasped.

"Luke?! What the hell?!" Ben exclaimed.

"I needed to do something about this exhausting tension of two supposed best friends. You two kept acting as if you were too busy for one another, I don't need that sort of energy in the temple! You two can be friends and still be the greatest Jedi there is." He nodded, but Ben glared.

"You're telling me Y/N got injured over a false mission?" He said through gritted teeth, but you held his hand and patted his shoulder.

"Are you two okay now?" Luke asked, dismissing his nephews anger.

"No—"

"Yes, we are." You nodded.

"Good, then you and Ben will share training sessions starting tomorrow." At that, Luke walked away, leaving Ben there with a snarl.

"Damn that old man..." He shook his head, but you tugged at his hand.

"Ben?"

"Hmm?"

"My thigh."

"Right!" At that, Ben lifted you in his arms and rushed you to the small med bay in the temple. “Uh, how did you do that back there?”

“Do what?” You asked as Ben rushed along the halls. “Knock all those stormtroopers out?”

“Yeah...”

Grinning, you shrugged. “Just a little something master Skywalker taught me...”


End file.
